5 Speaking Traps That Make Smart People Look Insecure

There are five communication traps that even the most intelligent people fall into without realizing. And these traps don't just make you look unprepared or unqualified, they make you look insecure. How do I know? Because even as a communication skills and public speaking expert for over the last decade, I still fall into these traps. And if you don't become aware of these traps, you'll keep wondering why people overlook your ideas, why they interrupt you, and why they only listen when

someone else repeats the exact same point you've already made. But imagine walking into a meeting, knowing exactly what habits quietly destroy your authority, and then removing them so people instantly take you seriously. So, in this video, I'm going to uncover five communication traps, the deeper reasons why you do it, why I used to do it, what it signals to others, and how to fix it instantly. Let's start with the first trap. And this one is the hardest for

smart people to see in themselves. Trap number one, the delivery blind spot. Some of the most brilliant minds of our generation will remain completely invisible to the world. Why? Because when they speak, 100% of their cognitive capacity goes into what they say and 0% goes into how they actually say it. I mean, for the next 15 seconds, just have a listen to this clip of this brilliant physicist sharing something deeply profound. So, the last statement means what I've given you is only a hint of

this fact. But deeper investigations uh from this starting point show that somehow the notion of what space and time is at short distances is quite different in string theory from what it is. Sorry. Did you also struggle to get through that? I don't blame you. They were so focused on the content what they were saying and they were paying no attention to their delivery how they were saying it. And that is what causes a lot of smart people to lose authority. The reason why they stay invisible

this fact. But deeper investigations uh from this starting point show that somehow the notion of what space and time is at short distances is quite different in string theory from what it is. Sorry. Did you also struggle to get through that? I don't blame you. They were so focused on the content what they were saying and they were paying no attention to their delivery how they were saying it. And that is what causes a lot of smart people to lose authority. The reason why they stay invisible

because they haven't learned the art of engagement, the art of effective communication. And this is the fascinating reason why most people don't focus on their delivery. Many people grew up their entire lives being rewarded for their expertise, for their technical knowledge, and for their skills, not their communication. Let that sink in just for a moment. It's crazy, right? at school, at university, even early in your career, you were graded on technical knowledge

and technical ability, not delivery, not communication. So, you subconsciously develop this belief. If the idea is good enough, delivery shouldn't matter. My idea will speak for itself. But it doesn't. Because if you don't focus on delivery when you speak, they're going to think you don't believe in what you say. Even if you do, they'll think you're boring, even if you think you're not. and they'll feel as if you're not confident in what you're saying. Even if you are technically brilliant, say

you're a 10 out of 10 with your technical skills, you're a genius. But if your communication skills are a 3 out of 10, people will find it hard to listen to you. Remember that initial physicist that I showed you from before, the one that was a little boring who didn't focus on delivery. Now, I want you to watch a physicist like Neil Degrasse Tyson, who's an incredible expert, but he's a great communicator. He does focus on delivery. Watch the difference.

>> In textbooks, they have to fit the moon on the same page as the Earth. So, you think moon is much closer than it actually is. We've been lied to over all those years. If you drew Earth as a natural 3-in size circle on a textbook page, the moon would have to be several pages back from that. You need a fold out to check it out. Wasn't that way more engaging? And wasn't that much more easy to listen to? So, how do you fix this? You have to split your attention

50/50. 50% of your time goes into you focusing on the words. And then the other 50% you need to focus on your delivery. And the easiest way to do this is by using the vocal, visual, and verbal framework. Vocally add melody. When you're talking about something serious, speak with a lower pitch. But when you want to convey passion, speak with a higher pitch. That vocal variety keeps people engaged. Now, visually match your facial expressions to the tone of your words. If you're talking

50/50. 50% of your time goes into you focusing on the words. And then the other 50% you need to focus on your delivery. And the easiest way to do this is by using the vocal, visual, and verbal framework. Vocally add melody. When you're talking about something serious, speak with a lower pitch. But when you want to convey passion, speak with a higher pitch. That vocal variety keeps people engaged. Now, visually match your facial expressions to the tone of your words. If you're talking

about something fascinating, show that fascinated look on your face and verbally simplify your words. Stop using complex jargon to try to sound smart. This is a big signal of insecurity. This is just a generic list of behaviors that you can apply to your communication immediately. But if you want a more personalized list of behaviors that's specific to your communication style, I created a free three-part video series that's going to help you identify those

specific behaviors that are specific to you that you can use and apply to yourself to improve. And if you want access to that, just click the link in the description below or check out the QR code. You can scan that, too. Now, let's move on to the second trap. Trap number two, the impostor disclaimer. This trap shows up when people start their sentences like this. I'm not the best person to answer this, but or they say this might be stupid, but or they use the following. I haven't really

thought this through, but this is you disqualifying yourself even before you speak. Let me show you how ridiculous this is. When you use it in the wrong context, it sounds like this. All right, Ken, listen. I'm probably not the best bomb technician in the world. I'm probably wrong with this one, but I'm just going to go cut the red one. Okay, here we go.

Okay, here we go. >> Ken, no need to panic. We survived. Everything's fine. And what the hell? Did we unnecessarily buy a smoke machine just for this scene? And then now we're trying to justify it.

It's good. Okay, I know that's a very dramatic example, but I'm a dramatic kind of person. Now, obviously, you're not diffusing bombs in your job every day, but emotionally it has the same impact. When you predisqualify yourself like that, at the start of a meeting or before an idea, before a suggestion, people panic a little on the inside. They think to themselves, wait, if you don't trust your answer, why should we? And suddenly, your idea loses credibility before it even leaves your

mouth. Now, why do some of the smartest people do this? Why do you maybe do this? Firstly, many people genuinely value being humble, and humility is truly beautiful. There's a time and place for it, but saying these disclaimers before sharing something that's genuinely valuable just undermines your credibility. Secondly, imposter syndrome kicks in and you think to yourself, "Ah, if I lowered the expectations, then I can't disappoint anyone and I don't want to disappoint

mouth. Now, why do some of the smartest people do this? Why do you maybe do this? Firstly, many people genuinely value being humble, and humility is truly beautiful. There's a time and place for it, but saying these disclaimers before sharing something that's genuinely valuable just undermines your credibility. Secondly, imposter syndrome kicks in and you think to yourself, "Ah, if I lowered the expectations, then I can't disappoint anyone and I don't want to disappoint

anyone." If the bar is low, you think to yourself, "I can always jump over it." But the goal isn't to set the bar low. not all the time. And the third reason is a big one. The fear of being judged for sounding too confident. Most of us don't want to come across arrogant or cocky. You don't want anyone to think to themselves, "Oh, who does this person think they are?" If you keep making these disclaimers, the people around you will start to believe your self-doubt.

anyone." If the bar is low, you think to yourself, "I can always jump over it." But the goal isn't to set the bar low. not all the time. And the third reason is a big one. The fear of being judged for sounding too confident. Most of us don't want to come across arrogant or cocky. You don't want anyone to think to themselves, "Oh, who does this person think they are?" If you keep making these disclaimers, the people around you will start to believe your self-doubt.

You look less competent than you actually are, and your intelligence never gets the spotlight that it deserves. So, how do you fix this? You cut the disclaimers out completely, but you keep the idea. Start directly with here's my idea. Here's my perspective. Here's one idea we could explore. A recommendation is no disclaimer in any of those. Did you notice that? When you do this, you show up as someone who owns their contribution without apologizing for existing. Trap number three, the

content shield. The content shield is one of the most common traps for high achievers. It's when you hide behind big words, long explanations, and or overly complicated frameworks because you think to yourself, "This complexity equals credibility." It's the belief that if I sound smart enough, no one's going to question me. Here's me holding a content shield up to make myself look and sound smarter than I actually am. >> So, Vin, give me a brief description of what happened.

content shield. The content shield is one of the most common traps for high achievers. It's when you hide behind big words, long explanations, and or overly complicated frameworks because you think to yourself, "This complexity equals credibility." It's the belief that if I sound smart enough, no one's going to question me. Here's me holding a content shield up to make myself look and sound smarter than I actually am. >> So, Vin, give me a brief description of what happened.

>> To answer this properly, we have to define what we mean by happened. There's an objective chain of events which neither of us has full access to. And then there's a subjective encoding of those events shaped by my expectations. So when I tell you what happened, I'm not reporting pure data, Peter. I'm giving you a theory laden narrative about cause, blame, and meaning. What the Be honest. Do you know somebody who does this? Are you the somebody who does this? If you are,

don't stress. It's okay. That's why this video exists. If you've fallen into this trap before, here's what's happening internally. You're afraid of being wrong. You're afraid of being asked a follow-up question. And you're overcompensating for imposter syndrome by trying to outsmart potential criticism before it even arises. And when you do this, you overwhelm the people around you. You confuse the people around you and you sound defensive rather than sounding confident. Even if your ideas are

don't stress. It's okay. That's why this video exists. If you've fallen into this trap before, here's what's happening internally. You're afraid of being wrong. You're afraid of being asked a follow-up question. And you're overcompensating for imposter syndrome by trying to outsmart potential criticism before it even arises. And when you do this, you overwhelm the people around you. You confuse the people around you and you sound defensive rather than sounding confident. Even if your ideas are

brilliant, it gets buried under the unnecessary detail. To fix this, say the headline first. One clean sentence that represents your actual point. Then add detail only if somebody asks for it. That's it. Use one simple rule. One sentence to share the idea and then one sentence to support it. Like this. >> So Vin, give me a brief description of what happened. >> Yeah, a brief description. I went pee pee in my pants. That's why there's a stain. Hash vulnerability. # true story. Look,

don't over complicate things unnecessarily. You know, great communication, it's clear communication and clear communication is simple to understand. The goal isn't to impress others. The goal is to help others understand. Trap number four, the microchecking loop. Let me know if you can catch or identify what the microchecking loop is in this scenario. All right, Peter, I'm going to draw a square. Do you know what a square is? >> Yeah. >> Good. What we're going to do is this,

this, and then hang on. This looks a bit small, doesn't it? Does it matter if it's small? I >> I don't really care. >> Okay, great. Great. Great. But does this make sense? >> Yeah. >> Let me Let me draw that part one more time. Now, does that make sense? >> What? Did you spot what the microchecking loop was? Did you notice it? This is when every sentence you say ends with a right, yeah, or does it make sense? Or do you know what I mean? And sometimes it doesn't even happen at the

end. It happens in the middle of the sentence or even at the start with phrases like, "Sorry, I just have a quick question internally." This comes from hyper awareness of people's facial reactions and hyper sensitivity to how you're coming across sometimes, so much so that it pulls you out of the present moment. You're constantly scanning the room looking for consistent and constant validation. And beneath that is the subtle need for approval in real time. But here's how it lands to others.

end. It happens in the middle of the sentence or even at the start with phrases like, "Sorry, I just have a quick question internally." This comes from hyper awareness of people's facial reactions and hyper sensitivity to how you're coming across sometimes, so much so that it pulls you out of the present moment. You're constantly scanning the room looking for consistent and constant validation. And beneath that is the subtle need for approval in real time. But here's how it lands to others.

People start to feel responsible for emotionally supporting you at all times and your authority drops every time you check in and it communicates to others that you don't fully believe your own point. So here's how you fix this. Finish your sentences on a low pitch and then just pause. Let your words land and instead of you asking for constant reassurance, you ask for clarity after your point. You can say things like this instead. Is that clear? Did you have any

questions? Would you like me to expand on any of the points that I spoke about? It's subtle this change, but it shifts you from seeking constant reassurance to you now leading the conversation with authority and credibility. And the final trap, the disappearing spine syndrome. This happens to the best of us. Have a look at this. And this is why I believe that even though upper management said we should stop the campaign, we shouldn't. We should keep pushing forward with it. Okay, obviously a bad

questions? Would you like me to expand on any of the points that I spoke about? It's subtle this change, but it shifts you from seeking constant reassurance to you now leading the conversation with authority and credibility. And the final trap, the disappearing spine syndrome. This happens to the best of us. Have a look at this. And this is why I believe that even though upper management said we should stop the campaign, we shouldn't. We should keep pushing forward with it. Okay, obviously a bad

idea. That's fine. I didn't think it was good either. That's >> Did you notice that the disappearing spine syndrome happens when you start speaking really confidently, you're sharing an idea, but the very moment you sense disagreement or resistance, you see it in someone's facial expressions just for a moment, you abandon your point immediately. You say things like, "Look, it was just an idea and it's totally fine. Actually, you know what? We don't want no don't don't even worry

idea. That's fine. I didn't think it was good either. That's >> Did you notice that the disappearing spine syndrome happens when you start speaking really confidently, you're sharing an idea, but the very moment you sense disagreement or resistance, you see it in someone's facial expressions just for a moment, you abandon your point immediately. You say things like, "Look, it was just an idea and it's totally fine. Actually, you know what? We don't want no don't don't even worry

about it." Or you say, "Ignore me. Forget I said anything. It's all good anyway." your idea disappears before he even has a chance to stand. There are an infinite number of realities that could have taken place as a result of you sharing your idea. But because you have disappearing spine syndrome, you go straight to the thought that, oh, everyone hates this idea. I'm just going to shut it down before anyone else shuts it down. But the truth is, maybe they weren't disagreeing at all. Maybe they

about it." Or you say, "Ignore me. Forget I said anything. It's all good anyway." your idea disappears before he even has a chance to stand. There are an infinite number of realities that could have taken place as a result of you sharing your idea. But because you have disappearing spine syndrome, you go straight to the thought that, oh, everyone hates this idea. I'm just going to shut it down before anyone else shuts it down. But the truth is, maybe they weren't disagreeing at all. Maybe they

were just confused because they needed you to explain things more. Maybe they were just processing. Maybe they were just about to sneeze. And you'll never know now because you've abandoned your idea halfway through. And the reason people do this is because they place way too much weight on the first sign of resistance. Even if it raised an eyebrow or someone shifting in their chair, they immediately think, "Oh, that means my idea is bad." You also have this desire

to be agreeable and you don't want to cause any conflict. But when you do this, people stop taking your ideas seriously. And leaders don't trust someone who abandons their thought midway through their sentence. Here's how to fix it. When you're sharing an idea and you sense some resistance, pause, take a deep breath, and slow down your rate of speech, and finish sharing the idea with confidence. You can also use what I call the anchor and invite technique. You anchor by saying, "I

believe this is the right direction for us because," and then you invite them by adding, "And I'm open to hearing your perspectives, too." Once you commit to sharing an idea, commit to completing the idea. This is the balance of conviction and openness and the combination leaders respect the most. If you fall for these traps, it doesn't mean you're not smart. It simply means you've been conditioned to value content over communication and delivery. It's time to change that. If you want a

personalized breakdown of the exact behaviors that will improve your communication based on your unique communication style, check out the three-part video series in the description below or you can scan the QR code that you see on screen. See you in the next video.