Discovering How to Pray: Prayer in the Psalms

I'm supposed to be talking to you about prayer in the Psalms, and of course, since the Psalms is the prayer book of the Bible, the place to learn about prayer, there's almost an infinite amount of things I could say. I mean, the Lord's Prayer tells you in a nutshell what you should pray, but it's the Psalms, the book of Psalms, that's the place in the Bible where it teaches you how to

pray. And every single possible human situation or

pray. And every single possible human situation or condition is described or depicted in the Psalms, and in every one of those conditions, you are instructed, you are shown how to pray, how to address God, how to pray yourself through it. So there's almost an infinite number of themes I could

be touching on. Instead, I'm going to just touch on one. I'm going to tell you what that theme is and why I think it's helpful, I hope, today.

And the theme I'm thinking about is in Psalm 25, verse 14. The better

translations, I think, put it like this, the friendship of the Lord is with those who fear him, and to them he makes his covenant known.

The friendship of the Lord is with those who fear him, and to them he gives his covenant, he shares his covenant, makes it known to him. Now, the word friendship is a translation of a Hebrew word, soth. It's a word that means intimate counsel and advice, the kind

word, soth. It's a word that means intimate counsel and advice, the kind of counsel that an intimate friend gives to another intimate friend. And it

also, by the way, you can find some of your translations might say, the secret of the Lord is with those who fear them. Because that's also the meaning of the word. It's to your friends you tell secrets, you confide in them.

the word. It's to your friends you tell secrets, you confide in them.

So Psalm 25, verse 14 says, it's possible to have a relationship with God that is one of intimate friendship, in which God is confiding in us that God becomes our close friend. That's what that is talking about. Through prayer, among other things, we get many things through prayer, but one of

about. Through prayer, among other things, we get many things through prayer, but one of the things prayer is a means to is friendship with God. Now, why do I think that's helpful right now? Think of the word spirituality for a second.

It's a very popular word now. And it's fine. It's with us. It means,

generally speaking, experience of God, prayer. I use the word spirituality. But there's a caution, a cautionary note that needs to be struck, I think, at this point. And

that is, our secular culture loves spirituality. As in,

I'm spiritual, but not religious. And those spirituality and religiosity can be given a number of different definitions. I think what they mean when they say, I'm spiritual, not religious, is this. I want to be inspired. I want

to feel I have some kind of connection to something divine beyond me. But I

still want to be able to live my life the way I want to live my life. I don't want the discipline of discipleship. I don't want the discipline of

my life. I don't want the discipline of discipleship. I don't want the discipline of having to belong to a community. So I want spiritual, not religious, usually means I want to feel that I'm in connection with some kind of divine reality, love, peace, but I still want to live my life the way I want to live my life. Now, what's interesting to me is the

life. Now, what's interesting to me is the biblical understanding of friendship with God gives you the intimacy that modern people are looking for, and actually gives you an intimacy with God that other religions can't offer, they don't offer, they don't try. And yet, the commitment to truth, to discipleship, to

sacrifice is all there once we understand what it means when it says, when the Bible says that through prayer we can be friends with God. So let's divide the rest of our time like this. Friendship with God, that is possible, why it's possible, and how it's possible. That is possible, why and how.

First, it's possible, that is possible. That's what the Bible says. It says, Exodus verse 33, chapter 33 verse 11, God talked to Moses as a man talks with a friend. James chapter 2, I think 23, Abraham, we're told, was a friend of God. Now, Aristotle

thinks that's outrageous. Aristotle believed that the idea that you could be friends with a God was crazy. And the reason he said that it was impossible to be friends with a God was because we didn't have enough in common. Now, what Aristotle is saying, when he says, you can't possibly be friends with a God, we don't have enough in common, Aristotle is giving us an

idea of friendship which is right. C .S. Lewis was one of the best modern -day channelers of the ancient understanding of friendship in his book, The Four Loves.

And at one place in The Four Loves, C .S. Lewis says, look, eros, which is, of course, romantic, erotic love, and philos, which is friendship love, in their essence, they're somewhat different. If you

had to depict them, in eros, two people are looking at each other, adoring each other. But in philos, friendship, two people are side to side, you know, shoulder to shoulder, and looking at something else. And C .S. Lewis says

that friendships start with the explicit or implicit statement, you too? You

love this painting too? You like this music too? You've had the same experience with your parents too? You see, friendship starts when there's two people looking at the same thing, and they have it in common. You too? And that's the beginning of friendship.

That's the beginning of the particular kind of intimacy that friendship brings. And that's what Aristotle's saying. Aristotle's saying you could never, I mean, no human being could ever look

Aristotle's saying. Aristotle's saying you could never, I mean, no human being could ever look at a God and say, you too? How can you do that?

Here's why it's possible. Here's why Aristotle, who's considerably smarter than not only me, but probably everybody else in this room, though there might be a couple outliers out there.

In which case, 3 ,000 years from now, if the world goes on, they'll be talking about your writings. Aristotle's a smart guy, got this wrong.

Here's why. Biblical theology, almost every part of biblical theology shows us why friendship with God is possible. First of all, let's talk about the doctrine of God. We have a triune God. We have a God who's not unipersonal, one God, but three persons in that one God. He's tri

-personal, Father, Son, Holy Spirit, who know and love each other, and have been doing that throughout eternity. In which case, you could actually say God, the triune God is a friendship. Now, by the way, the doctrine of the Trinity is such

a friendship. Now, by the way, the doctrine of the Trinity is such that if you put too much emphasis on God's oneness or too much emphasis on God's threeness, you run into trouble. You don't do justice to the biblical material.

So you have to always keep this in balance. But for the moment, I'm just going to look at the threeness. And St. Augustine, though, by the way, if he's ever criticized in his Trinitarian theology, he's often criticized for too much oneness. But nevertheless,

Augustine pointed out that if we had a unipersonal God, a God who existed as a person and then later on started to create angels or human beings or whatever. See, love

is only possible between persons. And so if God starts as one person, then God would be power before he was love. In other words, he'd use his power to start creating beings, and because he had beings, then he could enter into a relation with beings, and those beings, that would be love. But you see, as Augustine said, if God was unipersonal, then power would be primary, and love would be secondary

to God's being. But because we have a triune God, a God who is a friendship from all eternity, therefore, friendship, communication, love, relationship is primary. So the doctrine of God, God is a friendship. Secondly, the doctrine of creation, you and I are made in the image

a friendship. Secondly, the doctrine of creation, you and I are made in the image of God. What does that mean? Well, it means a lot. But again, let's just

of God. What does that mean? Well, it means a lot. But again, let's just take a look at one thing. It means we're made in the image of a God who is a friendship. And therefore, I've been around when people have been dying. I've been a pastor for a long time. And I

want you to know that I've never heard anybody say, as they were dying, oh, I wish I'd made more money. I wish I'd spent more time at work. I

wish I'd accrued more power. No, no, no. They always say, I wish I'd spent more time with my children. I wish I'd done better with my friends. They're always

saying, oh, relationships, relationships. Why? Because they're made in the image of God. And this

God, because our God is triune, love, friendship, relationship is primary.

And then there's the whole history of redemption. Do you know that the entire history of redemption, in a sense, is one gigantic cosmic act of friendship? First of all, God becomes a human being. God the Son becomes a human being. And you know what that means? What it says in Hebrews, he

was made like us in every way except for sin. He was

made like us in every way except for sin. So first of all, God knows what it's like to be human. God knows what it's like to live a life.

But more than that, on the cross, John chapter 15, Jesus says, the greatest act of friendship possible is to lay down your life for your friends.

No other God of any other major religion could possibly lay down his life for his friends because no other God went through the first act of friendship, which is incarnation. I'm going to become like you. So I become vulnerable. I become

mortal. I become killable. And then on the cross, what does Jesus do? He becomes

like us, not just in our life, but in our death, in our darkness. In

fact, on the cross, Jesus Christ becomes like us in our lostness.

My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? In our lostness.

Oh, Aristotle. Look. Look at Jesus Christ. Look at the Son of God crying, yelling,

Christ. Look at the Son of God crying, yelling, being betrayed. All the sorts of things that we go through.

being betrayed. All the sorts of things that we go through.

Feeling cut off from God. And now you can look up at Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and you can say, you too? See? So Aristotle's

wrong. It's possible to be friends with God. Every single aspect of biblical theology tells you that's possible. Or another way to put it is, every single aspect of biblical theology makes it possible for us to be friends with God. Now,

this is about prayer. Let's talk finally about how it's possible. That is possible. Why

it's possible. But how is it cultivated? And what I like about thinking about prayer in terms of friendship with God is that the friendship gives me a framework for the prayer. Let me show you what I mean. There's,

let's see, how many will I give you? One, two, three, four. I'm going to give you five. Five ways to cultivate friendship with God. Number one,

obedience. Didn't think I was going to go there, did you?

Intimacy with God. Obedience. Start there. Why? Well, for example, John chapter 15, verse 14, Jesus says, if you do what I command you, you are my friends. By the way, Psalm 66, 18 says, if I cherished iniquity in my heart, he would not hear me. Now, see, let's, I

can't tell you how many people I know who found that they lost their intimacy with God, their friendship with God, because they weren't obeying him.

Now, here's where Aristotle is kind of, this is probably why Aristotle was concerned about talking about friendship with God or the gods. He says, no, we're too different. Well,

I tried to show you that because of biblical theology, we're not too different because of the image of God in me and you, and because the atonement and the incarnation on God's side, because the image of God on our side, stunningly, we can be God's friends. But the fact is that God is not just like us. Yes, he's a lot like us only because of

the incarnation and the atonement, but he's not just like us. And we must never think of friendship with God as treating him just like us. There's

two reasons why obedience is necessary for friendship. Number one,

if you obey him, you're going to become more like him. It's called holiness.

And all of you know who have had friendships for a long period of time is friends rub off on each other, you know? Friends rub off on each other.

They sharpen each other. They move each other more toward one another in many ways. You have to. Now, Jesus Christ has already done his part.

He's come an enormously long way to become like us, called the incarnation, the atonement.

Okay, that's a long way. But it's only through obedience you start to move closer to him. You start to become more like him. And therefore, without obedience, there can't

to him. You start to become more like him. And therefore, without obedience, there can't be friendship because in friendship people converge. They come together. They learn from each other.

They become more like each other in many ways. But here's a second reason why obedience is necessary for friendship with God. And that is, isn't it true, don't we always say, that if this person is going to be your friend, you've got to let that person be him or herself? You've got to allow transparency. You need transparency.

You want that person not to try to be somebody that you want them to be. You need to know who that person really is. That person needs to be

be. You need to know who that person really is. That person needs to be him or herself with you. Isn't that friendship? Right. Okay, well, then how do you have friendship with the Lord of the universe without treating him like he is and letting him be himself? The only way to do that is to obey him. Obey

him. Elizabeth Elliott tells a story that I've never forgotten because you'll see why. She tells about how her little brother, Tommy, was always told by his mother that he could play with his toys but he had to put them away. And one

day he had played with them. A lot of them weren't really toys. They were

like paper bags and things like that that they used to play with. But he

had taken all these things out and he had been playing with them and he had left them all over the floor. And suddenly he noticed, uh -oh, it's time for my music lessons because his music lessons are at a certain point. So he

went into the living room and he got up into the piano and he started playing his practice lessons.

Well, evidently, Elizabeth and Tommy's mother came in, saw that he had left the place a wreck, walks in the living room and says, Tommy, you did not put away your things. But Tommy, because he was practicing, this is a Christian home, you know

your things. But Tommy, because he was practicing, this is a Christian home, you know what his lessons were? He was playing hymns. His practicing, the piano, his practice piano time was playing hymns. So Tommy says, Mom, I'm singing praise to Jesus.

And she said, and this will go down, you know, in the ages, she said, there's no use singing praises to Jesus when you're being disobedient. But I have to tell you, our churches are filled with people that come for a high on Sunday, but they're being disobedient. They come, they want to feel good. They want to be spiritual, but not religious, I guess. You know, they want to have the feeling of

intimacy, but they don't want to get their life in line. But that, you know, Jesus said, listen, if you obey what I command you, you are my friends.

So the first thing you need for an intimate friendship with God is obedience. Second

thing you need is to believe in justification by faith alone. You said, oh, yeah, I knew Tim Keller would get to that somehow. I have no idea how he does it, but there it is. Well, yeah, I think I have to.

And here's the reason why. Psalm 1, well, before I even get to Psalm 1, listen, if you are trying to have a relationship with God and you do not understand the doctrine of justification by faith alone, you do not understand that you are not saved by your works or saved by your moral efforts, but

that it's a gift through what Jesus Christ did on the cross. If you don't understand that, your relationship with God has to be a mercenary one. Basically, God

cannot be your friend. God will be your boss. Now, when you're working for your employer, you have a relationship, you're the employee, that's the employer. And you might be friendly with your boss, but you know the fundamental nature of the relationship. No

matter how friendly you are, it is a mercenary relationship. You have to do X, Y, Z. And your boss has to pay you X, Y, Z. If you don't

Y, Z. And your boss has to pay you X, Y, Z. If you don't do X, Y, Z, no matter how friendly they are, they're probably going to have to fire you. Even if the boss likes you, the upper boss is going to make you go. Or on the other hand, frankly, if you do X, Y, Z, and your boss doesn't do X, Y, Z, then you have every right to quit.

You might be friendly with the person, but you say, I'm sorry. I took this job to be paid this amount. You're not paying me this amount. I mean, I like you. You're a friend, but I got to go. So friendliness might be in

like you. You're a friend, but I got to go. So friendliness might be in there, but the bottom line relationship is a mercenary one. This person's your boss, not your friend. And unless you believe the gospel of grace, unless you have a deep understanding of justification by faith alone, then you can't have

friendship with God. It's going to be a mercenary one. You're going to be doing your thing, and you're going to be expecting your benefits. And of course, if God doesn't come through and answer some of your prayers, you're going to say, where are my benefits? And you're going to be ready to walk because you were friendly to

my benefits? And you're going to be ready to walk because you were friendly to God, but basically you're not friends. You're not loving because you've been loved. You're just

doing because you've been done for. Now, Psalm 1, interestingly enough, says the godly man or woman delights in the law of God and meditates on it day and night.

Now, I want you to know Psalm chapter 1, that statement especially, to me, makes no sense without the New Testament. With the New Testament makes incredible sense. It doesn't just say, I delight in the law of God, to obey the

sense. It doesn't just say, I delight in the law of God, to obey the law of God. It says, the godly man delights and meditates on it. You know,

Jesus Christ in the Sermon on the Mount gives you the ultimate meditation on the law of God. There's a tendency, if you just look at the Ten Commandments to say, oh yeah, I can do that. But Jesus says, let's think about it. Let's

meditate on it. You know it says, thou shalt not kill, but you know the implications of that. It means it means to love. It means you're not supposed to hate. You're not supposed to resent. You're not supposed to despise. Yeah, don't commit adultery,

hate. You're not supposed to resent. You're not supposed to despise. Yeah, don't commit adultery, but you know that means you're not supposed to lust. And Jesus is meditating on it. Let me tell you something. Once you understand,

it. Let me tell you something. Once you understand, once you meditate on the law of God the way Jesus is meditating on the law of God, I don't know how somebody who is not saved by the blood of Christ, I don't know how somebody who doesn't understand the doctrine of justification by faith alone could ever look at the Sermon on the Mount and not be absolutely

petrified by it. And I think it's Dr. David Martin Lloyd -Jones that once heard, I think he said this somewhere in his great book on that, he said one time, somebody once said, well to be a Christian you don't have to believe in Jesus, you just have to live according to the Sermon on the Mount. And Dr.

Lloyd -Jones says, have you ever read it? God saved me from the Sermon on the Mount. I mean, if the Sermon on the Mount is true, I've got no

the Mount. I mean, if the Sermon on the Mount is true, I've got no hope. And see, the only way to delight in the law of God

hope. And see, the only way to delight in the law of God and not find the law of God and everlasting despair is if you understand that Jesus Christ fulfilled the law of God perfectly. He delighted in the law of God, he went to the cross, he lived

perfectly. He delighted in the law of God, he went to the cross, he lived the life you should have lived, a perfect life, and then died the death you should have died in your place. And now because that's all taken care of, now I can delight in the law of God. Now it is now a way for me to please my friend. Why? What's the law of God? It tells me what

my friend loves and what he hates. And now that it's no longer an everlasting despair, it's something I can actually use, something I can actually do, something I can actually use in my friendship. It's no longer a way for me to basically coerce God into giving me benefits. And now it's a way for me to love my friend. And they become like my friend, you see? So if you don't, obedience

my friend. And they become like my friend, you see? So if you don't, obedience number one to cultivate friendship of God, belief in the justification by faith alone.

Now thirdly, a dynamic two -way communication. You cannot

be friends without two -way communication. And everybody knows, well, prayer is praying to God.

But how do you hear God? See, friendship isn't friendship if it's just one way.

Sometimes, frankly, okay, prayer is a flare. Lord, please.

Okay? Well, you know, Psalm 61, is it? From the ends of the earth, I cry to you. Don't you feel that way sometimes? From the ends of the earth, I cry to you, O Lord. Sure, sometimes prayer is a flare. But

for prayer to really be friendship, you don't just talk, you have to hear. How does that happen? Now, there are plenty of people who say, oh, yes,

hear. How does that happen? Now, there are plenty of people who say, oh, yes, of course, to be friends with God, you pray, but you have to hear Him in your heart. And by the way, yeah, I actually do think, especially when you do what I'm about to tell you to do, hearing Him in your heart is definitely a fair way of putting it. But I have to tell

you, when you just have a feeling that God is saying, you should move, and you should move and go to another town, or you should take, you should quit your job and take another job, or you should date this person, or you should stop dating this person, God told me that. Whenever I have people that tell me they have this strong impression that things are from God, I would say, well, that

may be, maybe the wisdom of God, it may not be. But I wish, I usually say, I wish you wouldn't say, God told me that. Because I'll tell you this, I'll tell you this. Oh, well, you know, infelicit as a rhetoric. I will say this, if I'm getting messages that I'm not sure

are from my friend, it's not the best way to communicate. So I think that's from her, I think that's from him. No, I need to know it's from him or her. And frankly, things that go on in your heart can be wrong. You

or her. And frankly, things that go on in your heart can be wrong. You

know, George Whitefield thought God told him that his son was going to grow up to be a great preacher, and then his son died as an infant of a, tragically, of a sickness. And Whitefield realized that even though he thought God was telling him that it was actually fatherly pride, which he mistook as divine prompting. And so, look, if you want to know that

God is speaking to you, and that's the only way to have a decent friendship, you have to know your friend is speaking to you, you've got to go to the Bible. Because in the Bible, God is speaking to you. Not only is God

the Bible. Because in the Bible, God is speaking to you. Not only is God speaking to you, Hebrews 4, verse 12 says, the word of God is alive and active. You know, in Genesis 1, God said,

active. You know, in Genesis 1, God said, let there be light, and there was light. He doesn't say, God said, let there be light, and then went ahead and made light. God's word was his power.

God said, let there be light, and there was light. Go to Psalm 29. It

talks about the it says, you know, the thunder, it thunders, it lightenings. And it says, the voice of the Lord thunders, the voice of the Lord lightenings. It's like Genesis chapter 1. That is, when God speaks, it happens. God's word is a power. It's not like God's word is not like our

happens. God's word is a power. It's not like God's word is not like our word. We say something, but then we have to do it. God's word is his

word. We say something, but then we have to do it. God's word is his active power. And when you hear God speaking to you in his word, when you

active power. And when you hear God speaking to you in his word, when you study his word, when you hear his voice to you in his word, that is his power coming into your life. That is his reality coming into your life.

So the, Psalm chapter 1 is the first Psalm, but Psalms is a prayer book. And Psalm 1 is not about praying. Do you notice that? It's

about meditating on the Bible. And Eugene Peterson and some other people who have studied the Psalms for years say, that Psalm 1 is a gateway into the rest of the Psalter. It's almost like saying, if you want to make sure your prayer life

the Psalter. It's almost like saying, if you want to make sure your prayer life is meaningful, you need to be deep into the word of God. When you study the word of God, God is speaking to you, and then you respond in prayer.

And you must respond to what God says to you in his word, not just how you're feeling. I just mentioned Eugene Peterson. He can say some powerful things about that. Peterson says that if it's friendship, it has to be two ways. Prayer,

that. Peterson says that if it's friendship, it has to be two ways. Prayer,

listen to the word of God, and then responding through prayer. Listen to the word of God, and then responding through prayer. That's how you have a friendship. Because you're

actually responding in prayer to the friend who actually exists, not just the friend you want him to be. You've got to let your prayer life be galvanized by the word. So Eugene Peterson says it like this, in a world

word. So Eugene Peterson says it like this, in a world of prayers that indulge the religious ego and cultivate passionate longings, the Psalms stand out with a kind of angular austerity. Left to ourselves, we will pray to some God who speaks what we like hearing, or to the part of God we manage to understand. But what is critical is that we speak to the God who

speaks to us, and to everything that he speaks to us in the Bible.

There's a difference between praying to an unknown God whom we hope to discover in our praying, and praying to the known God revealed through Israel and Jesus Christ who speaks our language. In the first, we indulge our appetite for religious fulfillment. In the

second, we practice obedient faith. The first is a lot more fun, the second is a lot more important. What is essential in prayer is not that we learn to express ourselves, but that we learn to answer God. The Psalms were not prayed by people trying to understand themselves. They were not the record of people searching for the meaning of life. They were prayed by people who understood that God had everything to

do with them. God not their feelings was the center. God not their souls was this issue. God not the meaning of life was critical. Feelings, souls, and meanings were

this issue. God not the meaning of life was critical. Feelings, souls, and meanings were not excluded. They're very much in evidence, but they are not the reason for the

not excluded. They're very much in evidence, but they are not the reason for the prayers. Human experience might provoke the prayers, but they do not condition them. It is

prayers. Human experience might provoke the prayers, but they do not condition them. It is

not simply a belief in God that conditions these prayers, but a doctrine of God.

We would rather pray by exploring our own deep spiritual capacities with God as background music, without bothering with the tedium and complexity of the scriptures. But if we elect the Psalms to train us in prayer, these are the conditions in which we will be working. It's got to be two ways you want to have friendship. You've

got to be immersed in the word of God. Your prayer has to be in response to what God's saying to you in his word. Number three, so we said, how do you cultivate friendship? Obedience, belief in justification by faith alone.

Dynamic two -way communication in which your prayer is a response to your getting deeply grounded in the word. Here's the fourth. Sometimes a real experience of his presence that the Psalms calls seeking his face.

Got to be careful here, and I am a Presbyterian, so how, I don't know, this might sound kind of strange. Sometimes you got to feel him.

Now look, let's think about what the Bible means when the Bible talks about seeking God's face. I seek thy face. Even today, in

God's face. I seek thy face. Even today, in our digital age, if you have been emailing somebody, or you connected with them online, or you even talked to them on the phone, the first time you see them in the flesh, and you shake their hand, or you give them a

hug, you know what they usually say? You say something like this, great to finally meet you. And the reason for it is to actually

meet you. And the reason for it is to actually see somebody face to face, flesh to flesh, conveys so much more about that person than any other medium possible. You're just getting all kinds of data. You're getting such a better picture of the reality of who that person

of data. You're getting such a better picture of the reality of who that person is than you can ever do through email, or through social media, or through phone calls, or frankly, even by the way, you know, Skype or things like that. To

see them in the flesh, three -dimensional. And there's something like that going on when the Bible talks about seeking God's face. I mean, the Bible uses sensory language sometimes for prayer. So Psalm 27, which I've already talked about, David says there's only one

for prayer. So Psalm 27, which I've already talked about, David says there's only one primary thing he asks, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord. To gaze on the beauty of the Lord. Don't believe he's talking about a literal vision to his physical eyes. You know, Psalm 63 says, Oh God, my soul thirsts for you.

physical eyes. You know, Psalm 63 says, Oh God, my soul thirsts for you.

I've seen you in the sanctuary. I beheld your power and your glory. Because your

love is better than life. I will praise you. My soul is satisfied as with the richest of foods. You notice in Psalm, one of the Psalms says, taste and see that the Lord is good. It doesn't just say, know that the Lord is good. Taste it. Now, why does it use sensory language? Jonathan Edwards

good. Taste it. Now, why does it use sensory language? Jonathan Edwards

is going to say, it's one thing to know God is holy with the mind.

It's another thing to sense his holiness on your heart in prayer. So that it changes you and makes you not want to sin anymore. It's one thing to know in the abstract that God is love. It's another thing to actually feel his love on your heart, sense it on your heart, so that you start to live loved

instead of living such a needy life. There's a difference. And you

can't always, you certainly aren't in control of when that happens. But friendship with God means that sometimes when you pray, you see his face, as it were.

Not with the physical eyes. John Owen, who's a pretty, you know, austere theologian in many ways, puts it like this. He says, when you're meditating on the word of God, first comes the actual exercise of the mind. He says, fix your thoughts and meditations on the spiritual truth. Then comes the inclination of all your

affections of your heart toward these things, whereby they cleave to the spiritual truths and make an engagement unto them. Now, what he's saying is, first of all, you fix the biblical doctrine in your mind. But then secondly, try to incline your heart toward it. Ask yourself questions like, if I really took this seriously, why would I,

it. Ask yourself questions like, if I really took this seriously, why would I, would I feel different? Yes, I would. Would I act different? Yes, I would. You

know, talk to yourself and say, have I really grasped this? This is remarkable. How

would this make me different if I took it seriously? So you're inclining your heart toward the truth. And then he says, finally, sometimes comes a relish and a savor in which lies the sweetness and the satisfaction of the spiritual life. We then taste by experience that God is gracious and that the

life. We then taste by experience that God is gracious and that the love of Christ is better than wine. And then he says, he adds this, if we settle for mere speculations and mental notions about Christ as doctrine, we shall find no transforming power or efficacy communicated unto us thereby.

But when under the conduct of spiritual light, our affections do sometimes cleave unto him with full purpose of heart, our minds fill up with thoughts and delights in him, then virtue, which means change in character, will proceed from him to purify us, increase our holiness, and sometimes, notice, sometimes fill us with joy

unspeakable and full of glory. So friendship

means obedience. It comes from being, it's cultivated through obedience, belief in justification by faith alone, a dynamic interplay between your prayer life and the word of God, and sometimes, by God's grace, because you're seeking it, seeing his face.

Here's one last thing. Of all the things you should meditate on in order to enhance your friendship with God, meditate on Jesus' death as an act of friendship. Meditate on Jesus' death as an act of friendship.

Derek Kidner, my favorite commentator of the Psalms and the Proverbs, he wrote the Tyndale Commentaries on Psalms and Problems many years ago, Proverbs. He defines

friendship. Now he's talking, when the Bible talks about friendship, he defines it at one point as candor and constancy. Candor means vulnerability, openness, transparency. Constancy means commitment,

openness, transparency. Constancy means commitment, sticking with you. There is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

So candor and constancy means friends always let you in, never let you down. Always have time for you, always open their hearts, but never let you down. Well, take a look at Jesus Christ on the cross.

You know, I don't remember much from my college boxing class, but I do remember they said, never have your hands at your sides. Never have your hands out like this. Always have your hands like this. Always, always, always put your hands in front

this. Always have your hands like this. Always, always, always put your hands in front of you. Never put your hands to your side. Jesus Christ not only put his

of you. Never put your hands to your side. Jesus Christ not only put his hands to his side, his hands were nailed out there. How much more vulnerable could he be? He made himself absolutely vulnerable to you. He let you all the

he be? He made himself absolutely vulnerable to you. He let you all the way in. And of course, he never let, he didn't let you down. He had

way in. And of course, he never let, he didn't let you down. He had

all of hell coming down on him, and yet he said, not my will but thine be done. You know, Charles Spurgeon, I think it was, that said, you know, and Jesus Christ looked down from the cross and saw all the people denying him and betraying him and forsaking him and mocking him and rejecting him. And in the greatest act of friendship in the history of the world, he stayed.

He just stayed. You know, there's a, in the second Boris Karloff Frankenstein movie, some of you are saying, where is this going? The second Boris Karloff Frankenstein movie was called Bride of Frankenstein. There's a pretty famous scene in that second movie

where the monster, who still can't speak, he's growling, you know, you know, he's on, he's running away through the woods. And in the middle of the forest, he finds this cottage of an old blind man. The man's blind and he's, as the monster's coming in, the blind man is on his knees praying to God, saying, oh God,

please give me a friend to be of some comfort to me in my terrible loneliness. And then in comes the monster. Now the monster, the blind man can't see

loneliness. And then in comes the monster. Now the monster, the blind man can't see him. Not afraid. But he can sense the man can't, the monster can't speak. And

him. Not afraid. But he can sense the man can't, the monster can't speak. And

he says, oh, you have an affliction, you can't speak. I have an affliction I can't see. We can be friends. So the blind man begins to be so friendly.

can't see. We can be friends. So the blind man begins to be so friendly.

This is something the monster, the Frankenstein monster has never experienced. He feeds him, he takes care of him, he sings to him. And, and you can see under the, power of the friendship, which the monster has never experienced, he starts to humanize.

He starts to say things like food and good. But then of course, some soldiers who were out there trying to find the monster, they look into the cottage, they see the monster, they attack the cottage. The cottage is burned down to the ground.

And all you see at the end of the scene is the monster, groping off into the woods, out of the fire and the, and the smoke just saying, friend, friend, friend, where's my friend? It's almost like the Frankenstein monster. It reminds me of me. Because

Frankenstein monster. It reminds me of me. Because

until I found Jesus Christ, I felt like I was sort of stitched together by what everybody else said about me. You know, my parents said one thing about me and my, you know, my friends said another thing about me and everybody had a different thing, a verdict they gave me about who I was. So my self -image looked like a Frankenstein monster. What I needed, what you need

is a friend, the ultimate friend whose love can overturn all the other verdicts and make you human. We're all out there like him. Every human being is out there looking for the friend. friend, if

I could just find the ultimate friend, then I could finally be the human being that I'm meant to be. Well, here he is.

Let's pray. Thank you, Father, for being a God who can be our friend.

No other religion offers this. They don't even try.

Many understand it as being madness, but we thank you. Thank you so much that it is not. It's God's truth. We pray that you would teach us how not just to say our prayers, but to be a friend to you in prayer. Be

a friend to us. Find us. Show us your face. We pray it in Jesus' name. Amen.

name. Amen.