How To Become The BEST Engineer At Your Company

All right. On becoming competitive when joining a new company, uh, I'm very curious about this because I know that a lot of people what they end up doing is they just work super super duper hard.

This is what I did every single time.

They develop a reputation for working super duper hard and then you get burnt out. That's what I did. That's how I got

out. That's what I did. That's how I got onto team Falore and that's how I ended up hating programming JavaScript.

Really, that's like where my hate of JavaScript started is right there. I I I absolutely destroyed myself. Context.

This uh this is a sort of write written down blueprint of how I became competitive when joining a job. Being

competitive means to me being able to work on most of the issues I want in the company in some fashion. Having

accumulated a certain stature and respect from both engineering and business side which I can trade for space and agency. Being in a place where I can break company soft/h hard rules to get things done. These are all very very

good things. It is shocking how much of

good things. It is shocking how much of life is building kind of like a social capital with people such that you can do stuff that normally is not okay at jobs.

Do you know what I mean? It's like being able to do stuff that breaks a bunch of bounds because they're like, "Oh, like a good example of this is when I did the I have talked about this, the destiny test, testing whether our play predict was actually good or not. Everyone told

me I was not allowed to turn it off. Uh

well, I built kind of a good capital of hey, I have some pretty good ideas out there and I know that if you allowed me to test it, I can do that. But people

were very worried because if the moment I did it, it could have meant it could mean bad experiences for millions of people. we could lose revenue, we could

people. we could lose revenue, we could lose millions of dollars a month if I was wrong. Well, I turned it off

was wrong. Well, I turned it off anyways. And then afterwards, everyone

anyways. And then afterwards, everyone highdived me and said, "Oh, I was totally correct." But it took two years

totally correct." But it took two years of me trying to convince people. Social

capital is a really important aspect of your job. And people don't really

your job. And people don't really understand why it's so important to have good social uh capital. I want people to think of me uh in the top five if there was a tier list of engineers and if possible ASAP. This is not really advice

possible ASAP. This is not really advice you should uh especially follow.

Everyone's different. Let's see.

Everyone's different and context matters. But there might be some

matters. But there might be some approaches in there that are valuable to pick up. Some of that advice is also

pick up. Some of that advice is also probably not super applicable to people starting out. You know, let's see. You

starting out. You know, let's see. You

will know that yourself. Let's see.

You'll know that yourself better than I.

Okay. Yeah. You want people So, his general thesis is that you want people to think of like if they had to get a project and they wanted an engineer on it, they wanted they want you on it.

This is actually a pretty good goal to have at a company because that means you're going to get much more pick and your boss eventually is going to have to give you more pick because you can't be everywhere at once. So, he's going to be like, "Okay, uh there's these three

projects. Which one do you want to help

projects. Which one do you want to help on? We They all are highly needed.

on? We They all are highly needed.

They're all really really good and so it's very very fantastic. How to destroy your social capital request a lot of changes from uh on a PR. Yes. Yes. An

easy way to destroy your social capital is to be super nitpicky on PRs. That's a

super easy way just to make everybody hate you. Like non-archchitectural non

hate you. Like non-archchitectural non things like a very very simple one, a one that I see I've seen engineers die on a hill. If you have a new promise and inside that promise is a rez and a

reject and some people will be like I cannot approve this PR, you have to call it uh uh resent and reject, right? Like

because I am filled with resentment at the end of this thing by the end of it.

Like it just gets real. Yeah. Respect

disrespect, right? It just makes me just furious. Those kind of things where it's

furious. Those kind of things where it's uh resent and rejoice. Nice. Uh

anyways, shape of the blueprint. I've

started a new job quite a few times over the last 15 years, and almost every single time I felt criminally underskilled for the position. Still

every single time within a few months, I would end up being the person to ask on any codebase or design questions to lead a new project or to assemble a new team to start on an R&D project, which usually entails having already acquired

a lot of trust. By the way, if you can get into this position, this is really where all that this is where everyone talks about all the fun stuff that happens with programming. R&D stuff is super fun to do. Often you have less

constraints than you do at like your regular like your regular projects that have to fit kind of nicely within it.

You have usually bigger projects which can be more emotionally demanding, but you get to usually make much bigger design decisions. You get to be able to

design decisions. You get to be able to try out new technologies. You get to be able to do all the fun stuff. This is

also where you get to say, "Hey, no we're not using a DSL." No DSLs. Okay?

Stop inventing languages. Because if

you're not the one on the R&D project somebody else is. And we all know what happens. Everybody in their heart yearns

happens. Everybody in their heart yearns to write their own DSL. But everybody in reality doesn't want to use somebody else's DSL. It's just like a fact of

else's DSL. It's just like a fact of life. That's what it is. It happens

life. That's what it is. It happens

every time. The truth is that the reason this happened so consistently wasn't that I was wrong. I was underskilled.

Most of the time I was. I think the difference mostly came from the fact that I was substantially more willing to spend enormous amounts of time on the job combined with having very soft skills or very strong soft skills and a

capacity to navigate social and power dynamics. The job here is not just the

dynamics. The job here is not just the engineering part. It's the power

engineering part. It's the power dynamics and relationships that make the company what it is. Who does what? Why

do they do these things? What matters to who? And as rude as that sounds, who

who? And as rude as that sounds, who matters. That's true. For someone that

matters. That's true. For someone that thinks that this is not true, that you shouldn't worry about these things. Let

me give you a very simple example of why this is super important. You're on your way to a meeting. It's a very important meeting. Some guy comes up and says

meeting. Some guy comes up and says "Hey, I need some help on this thing. Do

you have a moment?" And you go, "No, I have this very important appointment. I

have this meeting. I have something that's kind of preventing me from saying yes to you because I need to go do this other thing. I just need to do that."

other thing. I just need to do that."

Okay, let's invert it. Let's say that the CEO of the company, Reed Hastings comes up to you and says, "Hey, man. You

got a moment? and I got a couple questions for you. I don't care what your meeting is. The reality is you're probably going to not show up to that meeting on time. And when your boss says, "Where were you?" Say, "I was

talking to Reed Hastings boss. Sorry, he

needed my help." Right? It's a vastly different kind of experience. You

understand that there's people that contain more say or sway and they're the ones that you tend to be the ones you want to listen to or to please. I think

there there's most certainly something in here that there's the people you want to interact with and the people you don't. Even though it sucks and it's a

don't. Even though it sucks and it's a reality of work is that not everybody has an equal impact and if you're if you have a limited amount of hours and you have to do something, you have to prioritize that. Now, the nice part is

prioritize that. Now, the nice part is that there's always lunch and other social things where you can just hang out with the people you actually like and all that. But you still have to figure out ways to be able to understand and meet these people that are in these different ones, right? Ultimately, I

feel like I'm in the best place if I have an intuitive sense of the multi-dimensional landscape of systems features, and people. Pouring more time and care into everything I touch than

the average to great co-worker and being serviceable, friendly, well spoken, and trying to map out the essence of the company/ department depending on the context usually. This is one thing that

context usually. This is one thing that I think I really struggled with towards the end of Netflix trying to balance streaming also is being able to be

really serviceable and friendly on things that weren't that important to me just because of the limited uh amount of time. And there is something really

time. And there is something really important to that. If you fill up your time with a bunch of other things, it becomes really hard to just be a friendly person. Does that make sense?

friendly person. Does that make sense?

Like it's really really hard to do that if you're always in this state of hurry.

It's really hard to be friendly. And

that's something that I've been trying to really work on is learning how to drop this idea of hurry in my lifetime.

Not just constantly being in this like frenzy of going from one thing to the next thing. It's not simple and it's

next thing. It's not simple and it's been a truly it's been actually like kind of a heartache for me in the last few years is figuring out how to do that, how to avoid that. and my bice points out that I need to be uh friendly

every now and then. Yeah, it's really it's it's really really hard. There are

a few let's see there are a few core components to the mindset I usually have. I just joined. I am a tool to be

have. I just joined. I am a tool to be used. I must be serviceable and provide

used. I must be serviceable and provide value. No no task is too small. No

value. No no task is too small. No

discussion or person is beneath me.

Everything should be tackled head-on with a clear communication and reporting. Be fast than anyone else. the

reporting. Be fast than anyone else. the

faster I am, the more I can do, the closer I can get to being able to work on what I want. There is a truth to that. There's also a danger to this

that. There's also a danger to this though. I mean, the the problem with

though. I mean, the the problem with this kind of mentality is that I mean this is really really great. You know

there's a there's kind of like a fun internal uh phrase we used to use, which is that the most junior of tasks have to be solved by the most senior of engineers because few people have the

patience and willpower to go through really menial, boring tasks. It's it's

it feels like it it's impossible to get somebody that's that's uh newer to be able to do these things because they just they end up getting distracted.

They they're unable to execute. They're

unable to finish things. Um this is I mean these these three things are really really great. It's this one that worries

really great. It's this one that worries me. And when you take it to a job and

me. And when you take it to a job and you do that, you must understand that it's very simple for people to make this expectation of you. This is obviously why he wants this one right here. He

wants to be the engineer everyone wants to work with. But by doing that, you're also going to be like on the fast track to burning yourself out, always just working on the same project over and over again. If you end up being um if

over again. If you end up being um if you end up getting on to like a year and a half long super project, you're just going to be doing the same thing day in day out. And it may not come with a lot

day out. And it may not come with a lot of praise. And you know what the worst

of praise. And you know what the worst part is? It may come with a lot of

part is? It may come with a lot of negativity. Because usually these

negativity. Because usually these bigger, longer projects that they put you on because they think you're fast will end up being the projects that appear to have perceptually slowness

right? The perceptual velocity is often

right? The perceptual velocity is often more important than actual velocity. And

so if people perceive you being slower working on these big things, you can end up getting more crap despite you're delivering all the value you need to deliver. Dude, it's real crazy, right?

deliver. Dude, it's real crazy, right?

It's real crazy how how easy this is to be twisted, not into your favor. So, you

got to be you got to be so careful with this one. I think it's good to have this

this one. I think it's good to have this mentality though to be able to be fast and accurate is like a good goal to have. The problem is is that sometimes

have. The problem is is that sometimes when you go too fast, you forget a few details like that one time accidentally froze a billboard for a major celebrity launch. Like things happen, you know

launch. Like things happen, you know looking back at the process to get to that place, trying to reverse engineer it. A a lot of it boils down to building

it. A a lot of it boils down to building relationships, maximizing knowledge acquisition and shipping. Prerequisite

and mindset. First, the reality when you join a new job, the shorter your onboarding slash period where you lack capacity to deliver high-quality code at speed, the better your onboarding is

going to uh is going in my opinion.

Okay. So, I actually take a I usually take actually a different kind of approach here. So, what he's saying is

approach here. So, what he's saying is that the faster you can get through onboarding, the better. What I typically think of is that you actually have this grace period that exists at every single job. Let me let me let me whip this bad

job. Let me let me let me whip this bad boy out. All right. You have this kind

boy out. All right. You have this kind of grace period that exists at any job when you first join for the first little bit of time. No one expects anything of you and you get to set a lot of the

expectations in what they think of you in this moment. It's a very very important moment. And so what I think a

important moment. And so what I think a lot of people end up doing is they race.

This is what I did for a long long time.

They race as hard as they can to deliver as much value as fast as possible. I

always had this goal on day one. I

wanted to get a PR up and running. And I

did this at almost every single job except for Netflix. Netflix, it was day two when I got my first PR. And looking

back on this, I kind of wish I would do something different, which is instead of doing that, taking this time period to not only figure out what you need to do for yourself, but also just like side

quest super hard into all the tribal knowledge because nobody is going to expect a lot out of you for that first week, for that first two weeks. So, it

is your one and only time where you can be like, "What's bingo all about?" All

right, I guess I'm going to go look into bingo. What does bingo do? Why does

bingo. What does bingo do? Why does

bingo do this? I'm going to go do this.

I'm going to go meet with these people these people, these people. It's like

your one and only chance to network and to learn about all the peripheral stuff.

Don't give it to me at all. Yeah, give

me the mean. Give it to me raw. Right.

It's like your one and only chance to do this. And if you don't do it, you'll be

this. And if you don't do it, you'll be a sagge panda by the end of it because you will not have all that context that you could get for free. Like get the free context. And so my goal is never to

free context. And so my goal is never to go as fast as possible anymore during onboarding. Anytime I'm doing something

onboarding. Anytime I'm doing something I'd much rather figure out what's going on, why it's there, get as much context as possible while proving myself somewhat, you know, somewhat good, and

then wow them with bigger solutions right afterwards. I used to let's see I

right afterwards. I used to let's see I use quotation marks here because in many companies your onboarding is really also your trial period whether it's legal trial period uh is a different matter and that onboarding can be substantially

shorter longer than what it should be on paper my let's see first impressions also really do matter for that there are no tricks I spend ages in the codebase mapping systems and the relationships

out where the data is stored where where does it go who transforms it and why do we do this at all etc going up and down the stack I try and devour our PRs observe how things are done. How

problems get approached and solved and just trust my brain will absorb the patterns. It is at least for me all

patterns. It is at least for me all about the grind. Okay. Okay. So now it it actually does seem like he's actually going agreeing with what I first said which is that you should take a lot you should take this initial time as a whole

bunch of orthogonal research and try to get something like try to understand the broader company stuff because when you do do that, it's going to make you way more effective. To survive the fire hose

more effective. To survive the fire hose during the first few weeks, I try and fine-tune a blackbox filter to apply on things that seem low signal. If I'm

going down every path, I lose speed. Can

I do this task and blackbox as much as I can? If so great, I will code by

can? If so great, I will code by emulating p coding patterns of others from A to Z. Anything I believe to be low signal, I ignore and treat as a magical black box, trying to keep my focus on the most important

subcomponents. I have to deal with for

subcomponents. I have to deal with for uh that specific task. End to end understanding will come over time and through repetition. Does anybody not do

through repetition. Does anybody not do this? Is there any other way to survive

this? Is there any other way to survive in a large codebase? Right? Like is

there any other way you can get through a large a large large uh coasting obviously I don't know you get fired but honestly base take it I I don't really understand how you can do anything else

right like you can imagine that you're in a codebase and there's some like logger you don't need to understand how this logger works you just need to know

where you go and where to look I don't think you need to know a lot more about a logger right and so you can go in here and understand all the different things and try to really get it. But you also just don't need to. There's a whole

bunch of these functions where you like you just don't need to pay attention to how it works. You just need to know it's there and how to use it and that's it.

Just keep it a black box. The end.

Unless the architecture is trash.

Hashtag. Yes. Unless there's that one fun architecture where if you don't call this one function which has nothing to do with anything, you won't be able to proceed. One of the first things I

proceed. One of the first things I quickly try to map out is who are the wizards at the company? Those who are 20% guys doing 80% that matters. This is

usually a month plus long process which is almost entirely vibes based to make the wizard list is fairly simple. How do

people talk about this person? What does

this person do? How close are they to be uh to the core primitives of what makes the company tick? How is their code? Can

I see it? Is it impressive? You know

this is a very very tricky thing and I think this last part is very very very good to know about. Let's just say I've worked with some people that have that

had massive reputations at the company, but when you did get down to brass tax and you did look at their code or the things they've

done, it was almost none of it. Now

that's that's the really hard part about larger companies. Now, I've never worked

larger companies. Now, I've never worked at a company or I have worked at a company. I guess the companies I did

company. I guess the companies I did work at that were smaller, it was very easy to just understand that this person was good or bad. But once you get beyond say a couple hundred engineers, you

start getting this weird um I don't know what you call it, internal company influencer that's, you know, they're the big ideas guy and they often come out and they do a bunch of stuff and it

sounds really great and they have a huge reputation for starting things, but you can find that they quickly are a bunch of yappers and not a lot of doers. And

if you're not careful, you can suffer under their regime. I had a uh I had a time in my life I still I still think about it was like December 27th receiving phone calls to talk about

features and I just wanted a bit of Christmas and that's it. I was just like dude I'm so burnt out. I'm so tired of all this. I remember that was the day

all this. I remember that was the day that I decided I hate what I was doing.

That was the day I decided I was going to quit Netflix. And that was, you know the first time I tried to quit Netflix.

And it was just like, man, I can't do it anymore. I can't do it anymore because

anymore. I can't do it anymore because here's somebody that does all the talking, gets all of the recognition and I'm out here writing code non-stop for 60 hours a week. So, you know

sometimes the wizards, they're wizards.

Not they're wizards. Like, um, have you read the Harry Potter books? Who's the

guy that goes like this? Harry, Harry

Harry. He's the one that's not actually a good wizard, but he's the one Lockheart. There you go. Lockhart.

Lockheart. There you go. Lockhart.

Lockhart pretends to be this really great person, but what he really does is he steals everybody's story. Yeah.

Lockhart. Harry, Harry, Harry. Right.

He's constantly doing that. Lock cart.

And so you got to be careful. Are you

getting a law cart or are you not?

Right. That's a real That's a real one.

Stolen valor, right, dude? I like I said, there was there was a time period man. It was like 70 80 hours a week for

man. It was like 70 80 hours a week for a year and a half trying to get something done. And then it just it just

something done. And then it just it just I finally was just like, "Okay, I can't keep working on the same project under someone that's just absolutely changing their mind constantly that has this

great reputation at the company. I'm

going bananas." Like, I'm the one going bananas cuz I'm the one holding it up.

And and there's one other co-orker with me and he's complain. He's over there talking about being depressed and actually having really hard times. and

we're just like struggling to make somebody else look good, which is just very painful. Once I have a So, that's

very painful. Once I have a So, that's my worry about wizards, by the way. My

unwary about wizards is you find a great one and they're just great. Uh, once I had a solid list, I try to get closer. I

join the same channels. I read every message they post. I stalk their PRs. I

try to map out in which spaces they move, what people they interact with etc. I'll even look up their slack.

Ajira and get history to some vague lines of the main larger projects they worked on and let's see and the texture of their expertise. The goal here, by the way, this sounds weird, but let's see the goal. Let's see the goal. The

goal here is to understand how can I become more like them? How can I absorb their knowledge, their skills, and everything they have that I don't have?

How can I make them want to work with me? Most important, how do I get close

me? Most important, how do I get close to them so I can proceed with the above?

I would say there's a danger to this which is that it's not the stalker vibes. I mean, we all we all do this in

vibes. I mean, we all we all do this in some in some way or another. Like

everybody sees somebody who's really good at what they do and they want to they want to absorb and draft off those people. Like, I I understand that people

people. Like, I I understand that people are saying it's stalker, it's stalker fib, it's stalker fib, it's stalker fives. Just remember like how many of

fives. Just remember like how many of you guys also had somebody especially in your younger years that were absolutely top level people that you just wanted to like understand how they did and you

wanted to pursue mentorship and you wanted to like you wanted them to mentor you. You would do something very very

you. You would do something very very much like this. So I don't think that this is completely out of the ballpark.

I think just writing it down and saying it this way makes it sound a lot weirder than it actually is. This is just someone saying like hey you want to get really really good. you just pursue this person as a mentor. You pursue like you

truly try to look up and try to figure out what they're doing. So I don't want to say uh chat understanding of course he's giving advice about how to get ahead and chat says mabs I know it is there there's definitely a you got to be

careful how you read this and I could understand why people say this but I do want to say that there's also a negative to this which is the consistent this is

a very materialistic view of life which is every person and their expertise is a thing that is in your path.

that you need to use to get better. Now

notice that you can almost read this and see the transactional nature of the person with the skill. You can almost see it as a consumption. You can see the

consu the consumerism eating up like I the the the never stopping eating of consumerism lifestyle where it's just like they have something I want. I will

obtain it. I'm going to like figure it all out and consume it. Now, there's

obviously a good there's a good thing which is that I want to get better. But

there is the bad side of I want to get better always at all times and and anybody who has something, I'm going to pursue it ruthlessly until they are not worth it. And when they're not worth it

worth it. And when they're not worth it I no longer care about them. Right?

There is also a very dangerous side to this. To that end, I make a list

this. To that end, I make a list obsessively of both people and their skills or even their personal personal traits, scratching down every thought I have and making sure to feed my brain with as much data as possible. So, my

intuition and soft skills have something going on. This is how, by the way, this

going on. This is how, by the way, this is how salesmen do it. If you're ever wondering why you ever have some salesman you really really like, like have you ever met somebody that when you talk to them, they just have all this

they're just like really good at asking you all these questions and you have this really kind of like very positive experience. It's because they're

experience. It's because they're salespeople. This is what sales people

salespeople. This is what sales people do. They write down everything. They

do. They write down everything. They

keep journals. They know all this stuff.

So when they come by somebody like, "I'm going to be meeting with Bill coming up.

Let's go look at Bill." Okay, Bill. He

has two kids. They're both in soccer.

Let's talk about soccer. Last time we talked, wife was sick. Let's Let's

follow up with the wife being sick right? Bum bum bum goes in the middle.

right? Bum bum bum goes in the middle.

Bill, it's been so long, dude. Last time

I checked, the kids were in like the young leagues with soccer. Are they

still doing soccer? You know, and then all a sudden, this is how S like this is how salesman's stuff works, right? You

hate them. I don't think you hate them at all. I don't think you hate them at

at all. I don't think you hate them at all. I think all those people I know.

all. I think all those people I know.

And then they turn Italian. I'm not sure exactly how I just turned Italian. It's

me. Why? What are you doing? Right. Um

I'm not exactly sure why you would say you hate them. These are people that care enough to write a lot of stuff about you down so that they can interact with you the best. Now, obviously

they're selling you something. Now, what

is that thing they're selling? They may

be trying to get something from you.

True. But the reality is, how often are you trying to get stuff from other people? You're just bad at it. The only

people? You're just bad at it. The only

the only thing that's thing is that you're just bad at it and they're good at it. And the only way to be good at

at it. And the only way to be good at it, now you could invert this and say you should be writing. You could invert this and say you write stuff down about people. You write how they interact and

people. You write how they interact and all this because you care enough and you want to create a good company. I do say that at the end of the day, this is the ruthless version of how to get ahead out

of the company. I would say the more awesome way is that you do this for the sake of being able to connect and be a great co-orker with people and you make people feel good. the thing you're

selling them is a good team to be a part of. I think that that is much more the

of. I think that that is much more the appropriate version of this exact same execution, right? Like truly truly it'd

execution, right? Like truly truly it'd be the exact same execution. You can't

remember everything and so it's really smart of you to write things down. Like

you actually want to write things down.

It makes perfect sense. So remembering

about people is good and writing it down is somehow bad. Oh yeah. Well, I mean I'd say it's the intentions, right? I

think that ultimately it's the intentions that people feel. Again, we

live in a world where right now I think we're at a very critical time just in kind of this general at least online culture probably just in this chat where people feel that authenticity is at an

all-time low that every time you talk to somebody it's like a veneer of a person.

It's I mean effectively you're talking to J C Chad Jeppity all the time, right?

So the reason why chat jeyp is so annoying is because every time you read their responses, every time you read something about it, it's just so I don't know how to say it other than it's soulless, right? It's there's like the

soulless, right? It's there's like the the essence is all gone and whacked up.

And so you can imagine that people are tired of always being sold. NPCs, NPCs

everywhere, NPCs, NPCs as far as the eye can see. You're right. Right. But the

can see. You're right. Right. But the

the inversion is that I think it is good that if you wanted to make a great team if you want to make a great team and your goal is to create a really great environment, you have to do the exact same thing. You're going to want to

same thing. You're going to want to write down things that you've learned about the person. You're going to want to be able to have a running documents on all these things because you're going to want to be able to revisit it and be able to talk to those people in a way that you know makes them feel

comfortable. You're going to want to be

comfortable. You're going to want to be able to encourage them and make them the best teammates. And so this is like so

best teammates. And so this is like so you're going to have to write down their weaknesses. Like you're going to have to

weaknesses. Like you're going to have to do all this cuz you're not going to be able to do it all regardless of which teams they're on. Being able to drop a DM to tell them how I love they work. I

think that's supposed to be their work.

their work or I'm learning from them for uh from afar at least plants a small seed that the possibility to blossom into a concrete opportunity. So, this is obviously this is the consumption side of things. Side note, at my current job

of things. Side note, at my current job years ago, I uploaded a specific emoji from one of my wizards favorite anime and didn't say anything. He was one of the wizards that was the hardest to approach. Been in the company 15 years.

approach. Been in the company 15 years.

Superstar Free Electron. Not the most social. I waited eight months to use it

social. I waited eight months to use it on one of his messages which led him to ask wow who uploaded this which then this led to one two 10 conversations

about our hobbies and ourselves and then the company and our projects etc. We're let's see we're now really good friends and our teams ended up collaborating on numerous key projects. The amount of knowledge I gained from this

relationship and the number of projects that came out of this knowledge is mind-blowing and the story on its own dude.

Okay, so there was one good thing that anime brought to the world. Okay, it's

not all dis degeneracy. There actually

is at least one good thing. We can all agree there's one good story from it.

Here it is right here.

Congratulations. Uh life hack. Stalk

your heroes. Gaming social influence.

It's true. I mean, there it goes. Uh

jump the sociopathy uh shark there.

Yeah. I mean, for me, I feel uncomfortable reading this. Just in all reality, I do feel uncomfortable reading this because I don't like the idea of how easily I could be manipulated

right? What's the difference between

right? What's the difference between this and a misborn soother, right? It's

it's all this guy's just a soother. He

just doesn't have the ability to cause soothing and riding. Greyman level

infiltration. Dude, that's crazy. The

man's a greyman. Just walked by everybody.

you. Uh, it's easy to be manipulated. It

is shocking easy to be manipulated. It

goes without saying that relationships are needed on the product and business sides, too. This is something that isn't

sides, too. This is something that isn't always possible depending on the company you work in and how it is set up. And

writing about this here, I think, would be mostly useless. There isn't any methodology to follow on how to come off as genuine and interesting. And the way I make relationships in that space works

for me because I am who I am. Building

meaningful relationships with PMs to senior vice presidents, etc. is therefore left as an exercise to the reader. True. Talk about baseball. Easy

reader. True. Talk about baseball. Easy

peasy. Outcomes over the la over a few months nearly every single time and after going through this process, I ended up being able to participate in larger projects I'm interested in andor I let's see am in a place where I've

gained enough trust and agency/space that I can use it to barter to get to a place I want to be in. That place

usually changes over time as I understand more and more about the company, its objectives, and the people who compose it. I'm not saying that's how your job should be treated as a game of minmaxing and with it taking enormous

amounts of your awake time, but it is what I enjoy doing. I don't want to spend more time than I need sucking or being told what to do versus having the ability to just apply my intuition on

what are the most important things we should be working on. Don't buy into the popular and negatively uh conoted saying that if you do more more work will come unless that is something you want to

avoid. My entire mentality is that I

avoid. My entire mentality is that I want to be in a position where people ask more of me. So do the job, do it well, do it fast, do it a lot and with heart. Make relationships, make real

heart. Make relationships, make real relationships, that is make friends if possible, settle for trust uh allies who are indebted to you everywhere else.

These relationships will lead to more knowledge. This knowledge will lead to

knowledge. This knowledge will lead to concrete projects which will help you rise. Rinse and repeat. Make sure you

rise. Rinse and repeat. Make sure you stop before you end up in a 25 hours of meeting a week. Easy. I would say that there is, you know, even though I think there is a little bit of like I'm not

sure what the the the the internal term is for me. It's not I'm not reiling it but there maybe cringing is the best term for it. I'm a bit of like I cringe

a little bit when I hear such like consumeristic approaches. But

then at the exact same time, I sit here and think the projects that I got onto and the things that I wanted to work on.

I didn't do this. I didn't do these things. He said I I I went with a

things. He said I I I went with a different approach, which was to produce really good things and do it really really fast and then to suggest how to improve things. I was always suggesting

improve things. I was always suggesting here, let's do this. Hey, let's do this.

I'd always work on side things and then kind of present them and suggest them and find the people that were the uh influencers, if you will, at the job and present my ideas, present my ideas. I'd

always try to be in the conversation with the people that were making the big um decisions because I wanted to be there. I wanted them to see me. I wanted

there. I wanted them to see me. I wanted

to be able to say things. I wanted to be able to present my ideas because I think I'm pretty good at them. And so, by having that, I think that that has produced that that produced a lot of really great stuff in me. And I think

this is very very adjacent to what he is talking about. His uh his obviously is

talking about. His uh his obviously is like a lot more optimized shall we say is probably the best word to say it. It

is absolutely optimized minmaxed to the absolute nth degree. Um capitalism is a hell of a drug. Well, this is not really capitalism. This is just working with

capitalism. This is just working with people and trying to be able to get into the positions you want because under no because it doesn't matter what regime you're under. The ability to have freedom and

under. The ability to have freedom and to be able to work on the things you want to work on as opposed to constantly being in this toldto cycle requires you to have an elevated uh perception of who

you are. Yeah. And also in communism

you are. Yeah. And also in communism people definitely don't try to manipulate other people. That's

definitely not a thing that happens in communism. That's a pure capitalism

communism. That's a pure capitalism thing only. Um, I will say that it's

thing only. Um, I will say that it's hard for me to say no to this advice in a sense that if I were to say that you shouldn't work hard or you shouldn't attempt to present your ideas or that you shouldn't try to get in the same

rooms as the people making all the good like all the good uh or the all big decisions, it would kind of be unfair of me cuz a lot of the ability for me to do

the things I've done came through similarish behavior to this. by being

pleasant, by working hard, by making suggestions, by trying to be in the right rooms, by doing all those things I had a very good outcome. And so, it's

kind of this idea that I think you see this a lot, especially online, is there's these people that will work like, you know, during their younger years work like, you know, 190 hours in

a week, right? They're non-stop. They do

all this stuff and then when it comes down to it later in their life when they've achieved a lot and they have a lot of easy success, they tell people not to do all these things. They

effectively are like pulling up the ladder in some sense behind them. They

found something that really really worked and then they're telling you not to do that. Oh no, no, you shouldn't do that. You shouldn't do that. Don't try

that. You shouldn't do that. Don't try

to really come up with really great ways to be a good co-orker and all this kind of stuff. Don't work hard. You don't

of stuff. Don't work hard. You don't

need to do that. Right? And so I just kind of feel like, you know, I used we'll say, half of these techniques to get to where I'm I'm at. I did not go

full full boore into this. So careful.

You know, I think that's up to you. I

think genuinely here's like a here's kind of like a little bit of a secret.

I'm going to say something that's probably going to hurt a lot of people's feelings. If you're just a likable

feelings. If you're just a likable person, you can go a lot further. Like

you just have to be a nice person.

That's all you have to do. It's

absolutely true. Like that's going to help you more than anything else. If you

respond to everybody with like one-word answers on Slack and all of your feedback is just highly critical, it's shocking how little people are going to like you. I know. It's like Pikachu

like you. I know. It's like Pikachu shocked face. It's shocking. And so I

shocked face. It's shocking. And so I think this is just one approach that you can take. Honestly, this is just one

can take. Honestly, this is just one approach that you can take. Uh and I think there's actually a lot of good advice in this. And so interesting.

Interesting. Why don't you try writing down some things that you found out about your co-workers and all that? You

don't have to do it as a purely a um a stalking project, finding out the greatest person and doing that, but do it because you you say you care. And

remember that and then you can ask them again later on. And you'll find that you create a much much better um um much much better experience. Yeah. I'm not

going to I'm not going to read this um uh some somebody said that there's no manipulation under communism thing and then that it only happens under capitalism. I'm not going to read those

capitalism. I'm not going to read those stupid comments because you have to be brain dead to think that where there are humans, depending on the rules, there will or will not be manipulation and social ladder climbing, right? It's it's

it's super stupid. It's it's like one of those idealistics, super shallow Star Trek future version, right? The reality

is if Star Trek existed, Jean Luke Bard would have stabbed 900 people in the back to get to the top of the Enterprise. Like that's that's the

Enterprise. Like that's that's the reality. Okay, I hear you. I hear you

reality. Okay, I hear you. I hear you want this this great world. That's just

not there. Greed exists in all situations. Stop stop thinking that

situations. Stop stop thinking that there's some magic place that humans are just going to be like, "Oh, I'm I don't have any more greed. I'm a good guy

now." All you know, the fact that I used

now." All you know, the fact that I used to yell at my wife and sometimes when my kid would ask me the same question 16 times, I'd freak out and have to relearn.

Man, I guess that's all gone now. I'm

just a perfectly good human that operates with absolutely no uh no emotional no emotional variance. It was

actually just capitalism that made me angry this whole time. Good luck. Okay

that's just not how life works. Hate to

break it to you. Where did TJ go? Uh

there's also just uh this thing about turn uh turning your engineer brain into a useful tool for doing other tasks in life. Iterating on how to be better at

life. Iterating on how to be better at these things is fine. You have to work hard at being nice and friendly. Anyone

can do it. Yeah, there is something really cool about that. I guess it depends on how you're thinking about you know, when he says all these things.

I I I mentioned this earlier that it the other side of this is just trying to be a good co-orker to other people and knowing what they like and don't like right? Like I know my wife likes certain

right? Like I know my wife likes certain behaviors. So, it's not a sociopath for

behaviors. So, it's not a sociopath for me to do things I don't like because I know my wife likes it. It's called being a good husband. And so you could extend

this type of behavior, add infidum to every type of person. And it's very very simple. It's just like, hey, this

very simple. It's just like, hey, this is how you be a good co-orker. Hey, this

is how you be a good friend. Hey, this

is how you be a good all these things right? And don't be nice because it gets

right? And don't be nice because it gets you what you want. Be nice because it's the best outcome for everyone. Um, I'd

say both. I mean, that's the reality is if you want something that's sustainable, most people aren't going to continuously sacrifice non-stop. Like

people are like the reality is you will be nice and you will it will not be okay for you and you're going to have to make that choice from time to time. Sometimes

you got to do that. Being nice is not always the best outcome. It's true.

Anyways, real advice is to make friends who will get on a call with you and play botro for two hours. That's true. Be

handsome and attractive and don't be unattractive. That's actually one of the

unattractive. That's actually one of the easier ways also is uh lift weights exercise, be attractive. Wow. Get a

six-pack abs. I mean, I should listen to my own advice.