Matilda Djerf: What Really Happened At Djerf Avenue (& How I Kept Building My $36M Brand!)

You were the first person that Haley Bieber and Road ever collaborated with.

How did that come to be? It was on my DMs. Haley reached out to me. She was

like, "It would be so fun to do something like this collab, yada yada."

I freaked out. You're one of the most Pinterested girls. Like, you were

Pinterested girls. Like, you were setting trends across everything that you were doing with your life and also Griff Avenue and Gathered. Growing up in a small town, I did not have exposure to

allowing yourself to dream big. Was

there a moment that you realized this is not just like me sharing my life? I have

chills listening to you say that. Doing

modeling jobs. I remember one job they had edited me probably like three sizes smaller. Even my neck was skinnier. I

smaller. Even my neck was skinnier. I

did not know you could even edit a neck skinnier. And I just felt like I can

skinnier. And I just felt like I can create a brand that makes people feel good. Did it take you a long time to get

good. Did it take you a long time to get there?

Yeah, it did.

No, not a full sentence. I went through a really difficult time when that article came out, but also I'm a business owner, so I had to show up.

December 2024. What happens that day?

This is new information. Okay. You've

done a collab with both Sophia Richie Graange and Haley Bieber. Who is next on your list?

In case you missed it, you're allowed to be hot, smart, and rich. So, let's get into it.

Mattel the Jerf, are you ready to get hot rich? So ready. So I need to know if

hot rich? So ready. So I need to know if my team was just hyping me up. They told

me that you sometimes listen to the show. Is that true?

show. Is that true?

Yes. Love that. Are you a podcast girl?

When I fly, it's the only thing I do.

Okay.

Take my little sleeping pills and then I listen to an episode and then I have to relisten to it like five times. Well, I

was so excited to have you on. I even

did my hair in an updo because I knew that I could not rival the iconic blowout that you have today. How does it feel to essentially have taught an entire generation of women how to do

their hair? Honestly, it feels really

their hair? Honestly, it feels really good cuz the hair is like such a big part of how you show up for yourself in your everyday life. And I think that like we talk about makeup, we talk about clothes, but I just think about like,

you know, taking care of your hair and doing like hairstyles in your everyday life is not talked about enough.

It's really not. And even from an investing perspective, like watching what's happening in Sephora, obviously we did like beauty, skin care, now there's fragrance, but like I feel like we're just getting into the hair

category where it's being talked about.

Growing up, was your mom really into her hair or did you just learn that through different exposures?

Honestly, my mom is the coolest woman on planet Earth. She's blonde, like

planet Earth. She's blonde, like naturally blonde, and then you know, like Scandinavian hair like goes a little gray when you get older. and

older is like when you're 30 it goes a little bit gray and sweet and I feel like maybe not for everyone but for a lot of people. So my mom started coloring her hair like she's done red,

orange, blue and now she's had pink hair for like ever but growing up she didn't have pink hair but I think that like her way of like expressing herself has always really inspired me. And with hair

I think it was just like I've always had a lot of hair so I've always had to like style it and take care of it. So I think it just kind of snuck up on me. So, we

have one more year basically until you have gray hair as a 30-year-old. Oh my

god. Yes.

Um, I need to know if you in high school were voted most likely to, do you think it would be related to hair, bringing people together or fashion design?

That is such a good question. Honestly,

like looking at myself in high school, I don't think any of those probably. What

would you have been voted most likely to? Maybe like most likely to like

to? Maybe like most likely to like travel world, something like that.

something with traveling I feel like.

When did you start to develop this relationship with beauty and with hair that felt really intentional? Then

I feel like with fashion it started at a very young age. I've always loved clothing like styling. I've always been like the stylist in my family. So with

fashion basically like 12 or 11 or something like that. Probably even like younger. But with makeup, makeup has

younger. But with makeup, makeup has never been my thing. I've never really been good at makeup. Like today I had a makeup artist do my makeup because I'm like same girl.

I don't know how to put on an eyehadow.

For the life of me I don't know how to apply eyeshadow. When I turned 30 I need

apply eyeshadow. When I turned 30 I need to know that. But I don't know that today which is very unfortunate. So I

think with like hair I think maybe it got a little bit more intentional at like when I was 20.

And this is post you living in the United States. So you did a little bit

United States. So you did a little bit of a 2year living in California. Yeah.

What were you like being the foreign girl that was moving to California as a youth and trying to fit in, not speaking the language? I mean, I was so young. I

the language? I mean, I was so young. I

was like 8, nine, didn't know the language when I moved here. My mom could be with me for 20 minutes in school, which was really scary. I just remember crying. I was like balling my eyes out

crying. I was like balling my eyes out the first days of school. But then I think it was like 2 weeks in cuz at that age, you're such a little like sponge and you just like learn everything. So

after 2 weeks, I got the basics down. I

started like speaking. But I mean it wasn't a military school, but a lot of kids had military families. So I feel like it was very mixed. So I feel like me being from Sweden wasn't like a wow

kind of thing. So were your parents in the military? My dad was in the

the military? My dad was in the military. So you were only here for two

military. So you were only here for two two years.

What was it like moving from Sweden into a place where like you didn't know anyone, you didn't speak the language, you're making friends, and then moving back to your hometown and trying to reintegrate yourself as a youth.

honestly really strange because I think that like those two years it was only two years but no at that age like those two years felt like an eternity and also it brought like you know our family

together and then moving back I think all of the sudden I saw the world in a new kind of in a new way like my the town that I come from that's very

difficult to pronounce want to try no I would just make [ __ ] up yeah you have to know a little bit about me that's like close enough. Burus.

Burus.

Yeah. Okay.

Lowkey Swedish.

Okay. Here we go. Next language.

Literally. Um, no. So, when I moved from Buros to Monteray, Boros is like a very small town in the sense of like everybody kind of stays in their own lane, like you're not allowed to do something that other people haven't

done. If you do that, like people kind

done. If you do that, like people kind of frown upon it. So, like dreaming big wasn't really it wasn't familiar for me.

And then moving to Monterey where like, you know, kind of like the mindset of Americans. that's way more, you know,

Americans. that's way more, you know, like the American dream, people dream big. You kind of feel like you can

big. You kind of feel like you can achieve anything. Coming back with that

achieve anything. Coming back with that mindset to a really small town was really strange, extremely difficult. And

I don't think I really understood it growing up, but now that I look back, so much of what I went through, I'm like, "Oh, that also plays into it." Well,

when I was doing research about you, this is one of the things I was so curious about because I think a lot of people when they achieve fame or notoriety or entrepreneurship, they think they have to move to an urban

city, like they have to move to New York, they have to move to LA specifically. And I'm so fascinated that

specifically. And I'm so fascinated that you have chosen not to do that. What is

it about your home country that keeps you there?

My family.

Was there ever was there ever like a I need to be in LA?

Absolutely. I've had those moments where I've been like I mean I signed with an LA agency. I was with that agency for a

LA agency. I was with that agency for a little bit then signed with another one that was based in LA and New York and both times I was like dang it I just you

know I should move there but then like I just kind of felt like but I can also do this from Sweden. But I mean I do have the privilege of being able to travel.

So I mean I can jump in and out of you know the US when I kind of have time for it and when it works for me. But

absolutely. But I just also am such a family person. So I'm like what do you

family person. So I'm like what do you mean? Like how would I know? You know my

mean? Like how would I know? You know my grandparents are still alive and I'm so grateful and I just you know I can't not not see them for that long.

But that mindset that you were just talking about right like the small town don't dream big quiet yourself down. Do

you feel like that exists where you currently live when you're not in LA or New York?

I mean, in some ways, yes. But I also feel like it's up to me to go against it or to kind of like lean into it. And I

feel like me, if I look at myself and my personality and how I like move through life, I don't let it get to me. I just

know that, you know, I can do bigger things. I can be bigger if I want to. I

things. I can be bigger if I want to. I

can, you know, I can achieve whatever I want to. Even though the mindset here is

want to. Even though the mindset here is a bit more lowkey and, you know, like make yourself smaller. What motivates

you out of to get out of bed when you get an invitation to something and you're like, "Oof, this is really good.

I'm going to get on a plane and go and do it." It's so funny that you ask cuz

do it." It's so funny that you ask cuz not much, but the Hannah Montana like anniversary premiere.

I told my team I was like, "Guys, I think I'm going to like take a plane.

Like I'm going to go to LA. I'm going to do like the 14-hour plane just for like that anniversary, like the premiere."

And they were like, "You're insane, Matilda. What do you mean?" cuz I'm

Matilda. What do you mean?" cuz I'm really scared of flying.

Oh.

So I like I hate flying. So for me, Hannah Montana, Miley Cyrus, that was like the biggest thing. Yeah. I wouldn't

have done that. I didn't do it though.

So you're here in LA because you just started something called Gathered.

Yeah.

What inspired you to start Gathered?

Well, for me, Gathered kind of came from the same want as starting Jer Avenue.

Like I wanted to bring our customers and our community into the world that we're building. I'm invited to all these fun

building. I'm invited to all these fun things and like these, you know, great events and dinners and I get to meet so many cool and inspiring people and they're all over the world. So, it more came so from a place where I was like, I

just want to gather people that inspire me and then I want to write a substack about it and make sure that my community can read about it.

The most important thing is just that you can get the knowledge out to so many more people. And I think that when you

more people. And I think that when you put a small amount of people around a table, conversations just go deeper. And

I like that deeper perspective. And I

also like making sure that as many people as possible can kind of get that information and get that knowledge. I'm

going to Harvard and I'm doing a gathered with students at Harvard and I've really like I'm really really excited about that one. I think why I love having you in this chair is like you've seen such an evolution of the

creator economy. you started so many

creator economy. you started so many years ago just like going on trips and funding it and getting hotel rooms and getting a bikini here and there.

Do you think that the relationship that we've had with creators in social media has gone deep and then maybe gotten a little bit more shallow and now we're going back into getting like the real

relationships and dynamics with the people that we have these relationships with online. When I started, I think

with online. When I started, I think that everything was very, you know, perfect and edited and curated. And I

think that's kind of like the perspective that I came with that I was a little bit more like scaled back. I

came from the perspective of like sharing the ups and the downs. And then

with like TikTok, everything became very like you just shared everything and everything. And now everybody's talking

everything. And now everybody's talking about, you know, you have to share a different point of view. You have to like bring something to the table. And I

think that yes, while that is true, I also think that the space right now that we're in, the human connection, like that's what people want. So yes, like people want to know who's behind the

screen. They want to get to know you.

screen. They want to get to know you.

They want to form a relationship with you. And I think that you can obviously

you. And I think that you can obviously do that in different ways, but yes, I think that people do crave that kind of deep relationship, like the need to just get to know people a little bit more.

Yeah.

Do you have boundaries with that though?

We were like, I'm willing to go all in on these parts of my life, but this part of my life is just totally off base.

Yeah, I have boundaries. I didn't have boundaries before starting out and I think that I have gotten better. But I

also think that I kind of got to the point where I felt like I was giving away so much of myself at all times that I never had anything just for myself. So

yeah, I do like with my family, with Rasmus, like I do keep things a little bit more private while also sharing the things that you know I know that my community enjoys. Hi angels. Did you

community enjoys. Hi angels. Did you

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if you wouldn't mind, subscribe to the channel. And thank you. You, to me,

channel. And thank you. You, to me, became a household name. And I don't really remember like what year that was, but I just remember being like Matilda Jerf. And it wasn't just the hair. It

Jerf. And it wasn't just the hair. It

wasn't just the style. Like you were setting trends across everything that you were doing with your life.

Was there a moment that you realized like this is not just like me sharing my life? This is

life? This is maybe not in your mind becoming a household name, but like building a brand that is living beyond a specific niche. I don't know. So much of what I

niche. I don't know. So much of what I do just comes from pure passion and I love it so much and I just genuinely enjoy what I get to do every day and like you know the setting trends and all

those things. I just I've never really

those things. I just I've never really thought about it that way. But

absolutely like after the pandemic I remember traveling to LA and we did our first popup here. And I think that was like the first time that I was like what is this? like what the actual like cuz I

is this? like what the actual like cuz I you know I was driving down I can't remember what street we were on but it was in like West Hollywood where the pop-up bus was and I was so nervous I was like nobody's going to show up who's going to show up cuz also we had been

you know in Sweden through all the pandemic my mom was in the high-risisk group so I was like social distancing like practicing all of those things so I hadn't really you know I hadn't met customers and then being in LA and doing

that popup and seeing everybody show up that was very like what is this how many people do you think game.

I don't even know. But it was insane.

Like it was the best time. And I also think cuz it was right after the pandemic. I think we were all just like

pandemic. I think we were all just like craving that human connection and like meeting in real life and like people were lining up in their blazers and like midsummer. It was so hot outside and we

midsummer. It was so hot outside and we had a Blue Stone Lane at the corner of like that street and it's sweet cuz now we work a lot with Blue Stone Lane. That

was like the first time I interacted with that brand, you know, like everybody was buying coffee from them and like coffee cups all over the street and I was so nervous. I'm like, "Oh my god, we're littering. Like, what do we do? We have to clean up." And I was so

do? We have to clean up." And I was so like everything was just so new and it was the first time doing something at that scale and it was just like the craziest thing.

Do you think that's because it was like part this Scandinavian lifestyle that you had birthed into like more mainstream culture?

Yeah. How would you describe Scandinavian lifestyle?

Intentional.

Okay.

Slow in the sense that I think that we prioritize our well-being and our health and setting boundaries in a way that like, you know, some other cultures

maybe don't cuz it's very like go go go.

I mean, I'm I can't speak for all Scandinavians, but if I look at the ones that are like close to me, like nature, you know, like yeah, intentional, slow boundaries,

nature, gratitude. It's so funny because when I

gratitude. It's so funny because when I started dating my husband, I had this saying that was like, I live a slow life in a fast-paced world.

And it's so hard to do that in practice in a place like LA or New York. I feel

like when I look at your Instagram on a Saturday morning, it's like everything I dream of.

Yeah. What is a day in the life living a slow life in a fast-paced world like Monday to Friday? A lot of times also people ask me like what's the like how do you balance it? And I want to start off by saying I haven't found the

perfect balance of it. I work a lot and I think that on my social media like I I think sometimes maybe it comes off as me just having full control of my balanced

life. I really don't. But for me balance

life. I really don't. But for me balance is like also making sure to prioritize myself. So it's I wake up early. I'm a

myself. So it's I wake up early. I'm a

morning person, so preferably at 5, you know, drink my morning coffee. I do that like in the stillness, in the quietness.

It's just I'm the only one awake. Rasmos

and Rupus, they're like dead asleep.

They're not even like they don't know that I'm awake. I love doing my little like journal. That for me is such a huge

like journal. That for me is such a huge part of like keeping a balanced lifestyle. But then, you know, yeah, I'm

lifestyle. But then, you know, yeah, I'm at the office 8 or 9. I'm there until 6 and then like throughout the work hours I try to you know like because I have

Rufus I do my lunch walk with him. I try

to get air whenever I can. I try to move around. It's just setting time for

around. It's just setting time for myself with this scandi life.

I feel like you really did popularize it. Like I had not really seen it.

it. Like I had not really seen it.

You're one of the most Pinterested girls with this aesthetic. What did it start to feel like when you saw this Scandi lifestyle expand to like other people that were doing stuff very similar to

you? You always want to go back to being

you? You always want to go back to being authentic to yourself. And I think there's always ways to be inspired by things, but then making it to your own thing. Like let's say you're a brand in

thing. Like let's say you're a brand in the US and like you like the Scandinavian lifestyle, you know, like doing that in an American way is also so exciting and fun to watch as a Scandinavian. So, I think it's, you

Scandinavian. So, I think it's, you know, how it's always just like you want to be inspired, but you also want to make it to your own thing. I'm happy

that I inspired people.

I never thought I would like growing up.

No.

Why? I've always been very much like my own person. Like, I've always known what

own person. Like, I've always known what I want. I've always been very like I had

I want. I've always been very like I had my own style when everybody else was wearing, you know, I don't know, like a floral dress. I was like my mom. I was

floral dress. I was like my mom. I was

in like jeans and t-shirts and boots or like when we lived in the US, everybody wore their, you know, whatever they were wearing. and I like went to Target and I

wearing. and I like went to Target and I got my little like heeed boot and I wore that with my like purple lace tank top and like bracelets all up my arm. So I

think that I've always been very like I'm myself. I am who I am and I I won't

I'm myself. I am who I am and I I won't apologize for it. This also kind of goes back to like growing up in Sweden. So in

Sweden we have this thing called Yantal Yantog.

Yeah. It's essentially like everybody's worth the same. Like we're all the same.

Like you're not allowed to be a little bit more successful. you're not allowed to, you know, be a little bit more than somebody else. So, I think that growing

somebody else. So, I think that growing up in Sweden, that is very much like instilled in you. Like, everybody's

always just like talked about it. And

again, like growing up in a small town, if you're doing a little bit more than everybody else, you're kind of reminded of that kind of social code. So, I think that, you know, when I started even like

social media and then when I did get on the Forbes 30 on a 30 European list, I didn't really celebrate it enough. And

looking back at like the early years of Jerf, I also wish that I celebrated more. Like I wish that I would have just

more. Like I wish that I would have just like applauded myself a little bit louder and just been like, "Fuck yeah, you did that, Matilda." But it's like you said, I think that also like

success is such a in Sweden it can kind of like be like a word that you don't want to touch cuz everybody else kind of shames you if you touched it because you're not allowed to be better than anybody else. And I think that like the

anybody else. And I think that like the recent years I've kind of more been so that I'm like, but I did this. Like I

did this. So yes, I'm allowed to be really proud of myself. I'm allowed to celebrate it and I'm also allowed to be loud about it. Where are you at as 29-year-old Matilda in terms of like

owning what you've been able to build cuz it's incredible. Honestly, right now I'm very much like I did this

period and I'm really proud of what I built and I'm really proud of what Rasmos and I have built together and I'm really proud of what our team has accomplished and being able to do all of these things while still being in Sweden

and being a fairly like small brand in terms of everything really but still being able to have such an impact. It is

something that I'm really really proud of. I want to hold silence for that for

of. I want to hold silence for that for a second because I can actually feel it inside of you and there's a difference with just like saying it and there's a difference with like feeling that energy in the room and I really want people

that are listening to this to like absorb that I have like chills listening to you say that. Did it take you a long time to get there?

Yeah, it did.

No, Matilda, it's not a full sentence.

We're going to go there. What do you think you had to do to get to a place where you were proud?

Honestly, I think I also had to own all of like the hurdles that I've been through. I think I've have to like own

through. I think I've have to like own so much of myself and everything that I've been through, all the highs and all the lows and all the work that I've done on myself and, you know, with myself.

And I think like being able to sit with myself has really gotten me to the place that I'm so proud of everything that I've done. I really believe in working

I've done. I really believe in working on yourself. Like I see my therapist

on yourself. Like I see my therapist every week. I love my therapist. I love

every week. I love my therapist. I love

sitting down with her every week. And

some people are like, "What do you even have to say every week?" Girl, so much.

There's always things to talk about. And

I always want to just be a better version of myself. I always want to evolve. And if I ever get to a place

evolve. And if I ever get to a place where I stop evolving, that's not that's not where I want to be. And the mission that I'm constantly on is making sure that everybody feels good about

themselves and making sure that, you know, if I just look at like my running my company and our customers, putting the customer front and center, making sure that they feel good in what they're wearing and in, you know, how they're

showing up and in what they're seeing around in the world. Period. Again, that

is a full sentence. I feel like that really was a long that's it's perfect.

Okay, so it's 2019. Yeah, you're Matilda the Derf. you're about to launch a

the Derf. you're about to launch a brand. Why? So, I came from a background

brand. Why? So, I came from a background of working with Instagram and doing modeling jobs and also doing design collaborations for other brands. And I

loved it. I thought it was the most fun thing in the entire world. I didn't love modeling. That was more kind of a thing

modeling. That was more kind of a thing that I did to make money and to be able to fund my trips. Cuz when I did the modeling jobs, I started doing them when I was in Bali with Rasmos and we were

traveling. And then I got back home to

traveling. And then I got back home to Sweden and this company like one of the bigger Swedish like ecom companies booked me and I was like okay. It was so fun cuz that campaign was with Rocky Barnes love.

And at that time that was like I mean I would have been like I don't know 19 or 20 and I was like oh my god Rocky Barnes like what do you mean? Like I was that for me felt so huge. I had never modeled

before really like I I didn't know what I was doing but I was like yeah I'll do it. And that's kind of been my mentality

it. And that's kind of been my mentality always like I don't have, you know, education. I like I went to high school

education. I like I went to high school but after that no more education. I

haven't had any like proper, you know, real jobs in quotation marks, but I've always just been like, of course I can do it. Like if I set my mind to it, I

do it. Like if I set my mind to it, I can do it. So I was like, I'll do the modeling jobs. And then when I got the

modeling jobs. And then when I got the design collaboration requests with different brands, I was like, yeah, of course I'm going to do this. Cuz again,

I always like always loved clothing. I

always loved I was the stylist in my family. I would always like style my

family. I would always like style my friends. It was just my way of

friends. It was just my way of expressing myself. But then through all

expressing myself. But then through all of these things, there were so many things that I saw that didn't really align with what I believed in and what I thought was important. Things like, you know, heavy editing. Like I remember

doing one job in Italy that was also, mind you, the worst job I've ever done.

It was me and a photographer. The

photographer was so sweet, but we were shooting for this brand and I think we shot like I don't know like 60 looks on location in Positano and we were like running up and down all the stairs. It

was awful. It was so hot. And then when I saw the photos, they had edited me probably like three sizes smaller. Like

even my neck was skinnier. And I was like, I did not know that you could even like edit a neck skinnier. I didn't know that was a thing. And I just remember seeing those photos and I came from a background of an eating disorder. And I

remember seeing those photos and I was like, "This feels horrible." I felt so bad. I felt so bad about myself. I felt

bad. I felt so bad about myself. I felt

like I wasn't good enough. And when

you're at that age of like 19, 20, like you're just kind of like entering the adult world. And for me, I was just

adult world. And for me, I was just seeing so many things that I that it didn't sit right with me. Like it didn't make me feel good. Same with like, you know, when I started with like the influencer parts, I was like, why are we

not inviting the customers into the room? like why are why am I invited to

room? like why are why am I invited to everything but why aren't the customers invited like are we asking the customers what they think about this all of these things kind of like form the why for me

and I kind of just felt like I think that I can create a brand that makes people feel good and that makes you know that puts the customer in the center of the room like how do I make sure the customer is always seen always

celebrated and how do I make sure they're always in the room and it wasn't about you know cuz everybody talks about like the gap in the market you know you need to find a gap gap in the market.

There's not a gap in the market for the fashion like in the fashion industry.

There's so many brands. So, it was never about finding a gap in the market for me. It was more so about like really

me. It was more so about like really believing that we could bring something new to the table where the customer was front and center of every decision that we took. But it's really hard to

we took. But it's really hard to separate yourself from that, right? Cuz

it feels like I can see the energy. It's

like that's Matilda as much as as much as it's Jer Avenue. In your mind, was there always a segregation or were they always interlin? They were always

always interlin? They were always interlin. Durf Avenue is it's me like

interlin. Durf Avenue is it's me like it's an extension of myself and my values and what I believe in and what I want for the fashion industry. And I

think that even like when we started 2019 and even more so today, consumers also want founders to be shown like they want to get to know the people behind the brand. And I think like looking at

the brand. And I think like looking at myself in my shopping kind of you know habits like I go on a website and I hate when I can't find information about like

materials or factories or like sizing.

So like for Jer it's always like we link to the factories. We do interview with every like with the people who work at the factory. We talk about how to take

the factory. We talk about how to take care of the materials. We you know we tell people this is where we found the yarn. This is you know where the fabric

yarn. This is you know where the fabric is from. This is how the fit is. Like

is from. This is how the fit is. Like

you'll find photos from extra extra small to triple extra large on each of our products. And when I shop, that's

our products. And when I shop, that's what I want cuz I think that consumers also deserve all of that information.

They deserve to know. I even like when I can see the founder, like when I see a brand and I don't know who the founder is and I'm like, who created this brand?

What is their why? It brings me back to like when we were kids and you learn that Victoria's Secret is owned by a bunch of men. like it has actually nothing to do with women in the corporate work space or like anything to

actually do with what they're selling to. So even for me, I like to see who is

to. So even for me, I like to see who is behind this brand.

Obviously, there's risks to that.

There's like you're so tied to your brand.

Was there and is there a plan where you can like start to separate yourself from the brand a little bit more where it can like live on without you one day? For

me, it's like, yeah, I want your family to stand on its own two legs, but I am the founder and I am like the chief creative officer. I think that I just

creative officer. I think that I just like our community and our customers, they want to see me involved, but also I mean, we have a lot of people who don't know who I am and that makes me happy

like when, you know, when we do a popup and I help someone and they're like, "Okay, like do you work here?" And I'm like, "Yeah, I work here. Like, I'll

help you with the sizing." Or somebody like comments, they're like, "Oh, there's the model." And I'm like, "Oh, it's me." Like I love that. That gets me

it's me." Like I love that. That gets me really excited cuz that means that people have found your Avenue not through me but through another, you know, like well somewhere else. So I

think it's it's a question that gets me really excited, but also it's such a big question. And I feel like so many people

question. And I feel like so many people are tackling it right now.

Even Haley Bieber to a certain extent is so tied to road. Like although that it is separate, it's also not a thousand% completely separate. You were the first

completely separate. You were the first person that Road ever collaborated with.

Yeah.

How did that come to be?

That was so fun, by the way. Like, that

was such a fun collab. Haley reached out to me. She sent me a DM.

to me. She sent me a DM.

Did you freak out, first of all, when she reached out to you? Um, yeah. I was

in a board meeting and I like, usually I don't check my phone when I'm in meetings, but I don't know. I think we had like a break or something and I was on my DMs. I'm always in my DMs and I was in my DMs and I was like, "Haley."

And I was like, "Oh, what's this?" And I just it was like oh you know like we d like it would be so fun to do something like this collab yada yada and I was like the [ __ ] Also I was in a board

meeting so I couldn't like the people around the table like if I told them they would have been like okay what do you mean? I just wanted to be in a room

you mean? I just wanted to be in a room where I could tell people who like understood but also it's like you don't tell people at that stage cuz you don't know if it's going to happen and it's everything is like so secretive. But

yeah I freaked out. Of course I did. I

mean, this must have been like 2022, maybe like fall 2022, and then it came out winter 2024. So, it was a long time in the making. It was really fun. The

team, like Lauren, Kelsey, Taylor, they're all the best, and they just made the experience really fun. And

obviously, Haley's amazing. Like,

working with her was really special. So,

it was just such a fun collab. We really

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subscribe. Obviously, they're looked at right now as like one of the most successful brands. I mean, even in a three-year period selling for a billion dollar self. What are some of the things you learned from Haley doing

that collab as like the creator side that you now take to Derp Avenue?

Why I really love Road and why I really loved working with them because they also really prioritize every single detail. Like they go into the

detail. Like they go into the nitty-gritty like nothing is left to coincidence. like everything is so

coincidence. like everything is so thought out and I think that really makes the difference when there's a sea of just like skincare brands and beauty brands and fashion brands. So I really

love their attention to details and how perfect and you know immaculate everything is even you know like the campaign that we did that was like you know kind of like the Christmas vibe and

like the hair and the colors and how that tied into like the PR box that we did. Like every single detail was just

did. Like every single detail was just so perfect and I love brands that really pay attention to details.

That shoot will forever be ingrained in my head. It was like so iconic.

my head. It was like so iconic.

How is it working with two creatives?

Like you obviously have such a creative vision. Haley has such a creative

vision. Haley has such a creative vision. How do two creatives like that

vision. How do two creatives like that collaborate so successfully? I think

it's successful when you let you know the other person be creative and when you kind of like play with it. I think

that when you trust the person that you're doing something with, that's when a collaboration becomes really beautiful and really successful cuz you have to have that mutual trust and that mutual confidence in each other. When you did a

collab with Sophia Richie Graange, how did that come to be? So, we have a mutual friend and I believe I don't know why, but I think that me

and my mutual our mutual friend, we were like talking about Sophia's love for PJs and I started I sent her jar of PJs and she loved them and my our mutual friend, she reached out. She was like, "She want new PJs." So, I'm like, "Yeah, I'll send

new PJs." So, I'm like, "Yeah, I'll send her whatever she wants." She got the new PJs. She loved them. And then it was

PJs. She loved them. And then it was actually Rasmus, my business partner at Fiance. He was like, "We should really

Fiance. He was like, "We should really do a collab with her." And I was like, "Yeah, do you think it's possible?" He's

like, "Yeah, of course it is. Like, we

can do this." So, I reached out to her mutual friend and asked her like, "Can I have her contact information?" And then we just asked her and we made it happen.

And it was a really short like the turnaround. I think we must have reached

turnaround. I think we must have reached out to her in like May and the collab came out in like November. It was very quick and it was so much fun. It was

like the we did a holiday party here in LA and the party was so beautiful. Like

again the attention to detail like we had a dessert table and we had this like big gingerbread house that was a copy of the house that we had rented for the party and it was just like so magical and the drop went so successful. How do

you know if a drop is going to be successful with a certain person?

You kind of like see it right away like you start teasing and then you see the feedback from the consumers right away and that's how you know if it's going to be you know a good drop or not. It's

even like the same like I always wear like Jerf samples and I always say like I always you know because I wear Jerf all the time and then I'll post it in my stories and if I get a question like I wore this cardigan the other day and I posted it and people were DMing me like

where's the cardigan from? Then I'm like yes cuz then it's Jerf and then I know that people like it but then it's almost too late because if you're only waiting until Have you ever done a collab with

someone where you put all of this money R&D into it and then it drops and it doesn't go anywhere?

No. the top of your collabs um that's coming to mind right now for Jer that was definitely like Frankie's bikini, Sophia, and then MJ. And all of those went really really well. And I think that when we do collabs, it's usually

from like a gut feeling, but I also always say that a gut feeling is collected data throughout like previous experiences that I've had and like through different things that I've seen and like the DMs and everything. So, I

feel like gut feeling is also data. You

know what word I love to use for that?

Momentum. Like I truly feel like when I've looked at brands and studied them, the ones that are just like the they just have this momentum about them that is like you can look at it qualitatively

and quantitatively and be like oh this is like something that's coming up.

Are there a few people or andor brands that you're watching right now that you're like those brands or people have momentum? Recently just got back on Tik

momentum? Recently just got back on Tik Tok. I deleted the app for a very long

Tok. I deleted the app for a very long time cuz I was just like I can't do it.

Now, my TikTok, I'm just seeing a lot of Chrissy was on your podcast the other the other week, the other month.

I love her, by the way.

No, same. She's an absolute icon and she is so incredibly sweet. Like, we've had we've actually never met, but we have a really like we've texted back and forth.

Like, when I've gone through things, like I've been able to text her. Like,

she's so incredibly supportive. And I

really feel like they're having this like moment right now where I see them all over my TikTok and I'm like living for it. I'm like, "Yes, girl." Are we

for it. I'm like, "Yes, girl." Are we going to manifest a Jer Avenue times otter collab? How cute would that be?

otter collab? How cute would that be?

Like imagine a pair of just like like a little summer berries tiny tiny micro sport bra. I'd die. I would be the first

sport bra. I'd die. I would be the first to sign up for that. And I don't even live for this like drop model. Like I've

never been that girl that's like 9:00 a.m. I'm purchasing stuff.

a.m. I'm purchasing stuff.

But like I would 9:00 a.m. be purchasing

that.

I would make sure that you would have a so you wouldn't have to. But yes.

Thank you so much with Chrissy. This

woman, I can tell you, everything you think she is online, she is 10x like that offline. Like, she is texting me just like when Haley Bieber reposted Hotsmart Rich in her stories

the other day, she's like, "Yes, girl.

Get this." Like, this is you. And I'm

just like, there are people that you meet that are such girls, girls. And I

got to say, she is one. I've met quite a few of them actually on this podcast.

One of my favorites is Valeria Lipovetski.

Oh, yeah. And I love when we talked about this on the show, she talked about celebrating her failure of her clothing brand, Valyria Inc., she was like, "It just wasn't for me. I realized like my

sweet spot is content. I popped a bottle of champagne to celebrate the closure of my brand." And I think it was so brave

my brand." And I think it was so brave and so honest. And it it did make me really think about the brands that like have had so much success and then the ones that just like don't work. As

someone who has a successful brand and also the content arm, what do you think separates the ones that end up working from the ones that like could work but

just don't? Honestly, I think it's like

just don't? Honestly, I think it's like kind of like the why and the purpose and the passion behind it. And I think that obviously like you start a company for

so many different reasons. And you know, some will start a company just to make money, some will start a company because they want to change the industry, like whatever it is. But I really do think that like if I look at the space where

you know that we're in not the fashion space but more so like the founder brands and like in the social media space I really do think it's the brands that make it are the brands with like the really strong why and the really strong purpose.

Which brings me to what I was going to ask you.

You have a why. And you know how I know that? Because you've been through some

that? Because you've been through some [ __ ] Yeah.

And you are still here. And I'm actually not going to call it the elephant in the room because you came on here today and you were willing to talk about that and I think that says so [ __ ] much about

you and I respect it. Can we talk about December 2024? Yes. Take me back.

December 2024? Yes. Take me back.

This goes out to the news. Where are

you? How did you feel? I am in a rented house in Sweden. I'm trying to figure out the name of the place, but I can't cuz I was very I was like we were actually driving on like the highway and

like the intersection like where you drive off the other I think it was like a year ago now and I was like this is actually really traumatizing for me to see this. Um but now I'm it's not

see this. Um but now I'm it's not traumatizing anymore. So um but yeah, I

traumatizing anymore. So um but yeah, I was in a house and I call it the glass house.

Okay, cuz the house was just like glass. It

was like I could see out and there was a lake and there was the woods and I obviously did not feel good but I I knew it was coming. I had known since August.

You did know it was coming.

Yes.

How did you know that?

Employees and former employees reached out and said I did this.

No, they said a journalist has reached out to me and they they're writing an article just so you know. So, a lot of former employees and a lot of employees reached out.

So, you had some time to kind of like come to terms with this.

Oh, yeah. And we were in contact with the journalist. Like, we were speaking

the journalist. Like, we were speaking to her.

This is new information. Okay. So,

you're in December, but you've known about this since August.

Yeah.

Okay. So, what happens that day?

I I mean, I was logged off. I was with my people. I was with people that I

my people. I was with people that I trust. And then, you know, we had a team

trust. And then, you know, we had a team who worked with everything. Um, but I was very much like logged off that day.

Did you have like a few months of just that that pit feeling and then it was kind of over once it came out or how did you like actually feel when you knew that it was out to the public?

Obviously, it was very difficult, but we had been because we knew that the article was coming out. I had had time to sit with myself and to sit with it and to sit with you know the team

members like everybody in the company knew the article was going up. Everybody

was informed like we had informed everyone months ahead. So we had already had those conversations. So more so when the article came out like yes I am a human being and I went through a really

difficult time like when that came out but also I'm a founder and I'm a business owner so I had to show up. So

the article came out on a Friday. I was

in the office on like Monday or Tuesday.

I can't remember the exact day. For us,

like for Rasmos and I, the number one priority was just everybody within the company. How do we make sure we take

company. How do we make sure we take care of them? How do we make sure they feel good about, you know, where we're at right now? And how do we make sure they feel good about going on Christmas, like the holiday vacation, cuz that was

coming up.

Was it helpful to have Rasmus as your partner in life? Like going through that experience?

Both. Yes and no. One aspect of it was like we're founders together, so we both have to go into this like founder mode.

And when the article went live, when everything happened, like he was in the founder mode. Like he was not he didn't

founder mode. Like he was not he didn't have time to be I mean I would have wished for him to be at home with me at that time obviously cuz at that time I was just this small girl like it felt

like I was tiny little kid. Um but I also as a founder I also wanted him to be at the office with everyone. So yes

and no. I wish that he could have been with me, of course, cuz I was going through a really difficult time, but more so, I really wanted him to be at the office.

When you were in that moment, and I'm sure your head is going like a million different places. How did you reenter

different places. How did you reenter your brain?

I'm again like I've done so much work on myself throughout the years. Like I

started seeing a therapist when I was a teenager and I was going through my eating disorder and my self harm. And

then I had a period where I didn't see a therapist and then I started seeing a therapist again. And I, like I said, I

therapist again. And I, like I said, I see my therapist every week. I did so that fall as well. And I think I just got a lot of tools from her. And she

said one thing that really stuck with me and I'm trying to translate into English now.

Like in crisis comes development.

I always say in crisis there's tons of opportunity.

Yeah. So it's kind of the same. And for

me, that saying really stuck with me.

And kind of like when those firing thoughts came and, you know, when I was like really deep in it, I just always told myself that. And it honestly like it's still like one of those things that

I say to myself today that I really really like. I find so much strength in

really like. I find so much strength in it.

Mhm. I feel like even dealing with my own situations and as any 30-year-old, I think in your life, whether it's workrelated or friend related or whatever, you're going to deal with

situations where like there's context and nuance that's needed to like every single situation. Has there been parts

single situation. Has there been parts that you feel like haven't been given context to your story as like now the 29-year-old Matilda Jerf?

I mean, absolutely, yes. Um, but I think it's also like I don't think people are very interested in context. Like I don't think that's I mean people have you know

you'll always be a different version to people you meet. Like I will be a version of myself to one person that I meet and another version cuz people reflect what they think and what they're going through on you. So I think that yes, absolutely. I mean I was on this

yes, absolutely. I mean I was on this other podcast and I was talking about the 2020 I went through an octopic pregnancy and looking back that was like it was in the middle of summer. We

weren't a big team at the time. I don't

know, maybe we were like six or something and you know it was like peak everything like you know we had just started the brand. No, we weren't even six. We were like I think we were four

six. We were like I think we were four people including Rasmos and I crazy.

And I just remember going through the ectopic pregnancy and I remember afterwards and I it was awful and you know for so many different reasons. And

looking back, I really wish I allowed myself time to heal. But again, like the business owner and the founder in me just kind of like took the front seat and like I didn't allow myself to heal.

And there were so many things that happened that has happened in my life.

Like I remember a year I think this was like 2022 and 2022 was our massive growth year. But that year, my grandpa

growth year. But that year, my grandpa ended up in the hospital and my grandpa is one of my like best friends. And I

remember I was in a meeting. He my mom calls me and she said like it's very very bad. He's in the hospital. And I

very bad. He's in the hospital. And I

remember taking I was like, "Okay, I'm I'll drive down to my hometown. It's

like a 4-hour drive." But I continued the meeting. I continued my day. Instead

the meeting. I continued my day. Instead

of just like knowing to set those boundaries and to be like, "Okay, Matilda, you're allowed to go home. like

you don't have to show up every single minute of every single day. And if you can't show up as the version that you want to show up as, like maybe it's better to just go home. Like at a time like that when I'm so sad, obviously it

would have been better to go home. But I

stayed and like there's been times of things that I've gone through and I look back and I'm like, dang, I really wished I showed myself more grace and I wish I was just like kinder to myself. Do you

think that being the leader that you are today, you had to have gone through what happened to become the Matilda Derf that you are as a leader today?

Yes, but I never like I never want anybody to feel bad.

Your response felt very intentional.

Was there and this is funny coming from me because like I am such a protector.

Like I can already tell when the first video comes out where there's a difference out of the story, like my reaction is like immediately to like protect and defend and like it's going

to be hard for me to like sit in something else and sit in other people's experiences and be able to listen to that.

I feel like it takes real restraint to come out with like a very intentional and very like honest response like you did.

Where did that come from?

Wanting to show up for my community?

And I don't think like looking back I think I could have done it a million other ways, but at that time I was just like how do I reach my community here and now? Like how do I make sure that

and now? Like how do I make sure that I'm still showing up for them?

How did you do that?

I continued to just push through. Like I

continue to show up at the office. I

continue to show up on my like Instagram. Yes. I stopped with Tik Tok

Instagram. Yes. I stopped with Tik Tok at the time cuz for me like Tik Tok or any so like any form of media that I do, I do need to enjoy it cuz if I don't enjoy it, it's not worth it for me. So

with Tik Tok, I was just like this is not fun. Um so I just didn't really want

not fun. Um so I just didn't really want to do it. Tik Tok has never been my like form of content. I've never been a Tik Tok girly. Yeah, I'm very much more like Instagram. But yeah, so for me

it was more like I'm going to continue to show up for them. I'm going to continue to reply to my DMs, which I've always done. I'm going to continue to

always done. I'm going to continue to post for the people that do want to see it. And like I'm going to continue to go

it. And like I'm going to continue to go to the office to show up for our team members. I'm going to continue to work

members. I'm going to continue to work on myself. Like I would I just felt like

on myself. Like I would I just felt like I'm going to continue. I'm going to continue to push through.

That is honestly like something that like takes so much strength. Like I

don't when things are going on in my personal life that are like hard for me to deal with to even show up online when it has like nothing to do with my personal life is actually very hard for

me. Is that something you think that was

me. Is that something you think that was like innately in you or that is something where you were like I have to do this and learn this as I'm going?

Yeah. I think I have to do this and learn it as I'm going. Cuz for me sometimes I'll wake up and I'll be like dang I really wish I wasn't a part-time influencer. Like I wish I wasn't a

influencer. Like I wish I wasn't a founder brand. Like I wish that I could

founder brand. Like I wish that I could just kind of wake up and not share every part of my life or even like bits of my life, but I've kind of just, you know,

I've decided like it's my own decision that I'm working with what I'm doing.

And I love my job like I said. So I'm

going to continue to show up. And I

think that also like showing up, it'll look different throughout my years and it has looked different throughout the years and it'll continue to look different, but I'm going to continue to show up.

How do you feel about the situation now?

I mean, I feel really good about it. I feel really I feel very secure in myself and I feel very secure in, you know, how I lead and

how I show up at the office. And again,

like it comes back to me setting those boundaries. Um, and also it comes back

boundaries. Um, and also it comes back to me knowing that I'm not perfect. I'm

really not and I probably will never be perfect. And like I said, I always want

perfect. And like I said, I always want to continue to be a better version of myself. But I think that being a leader,

myself. But I think that being a leader, you can't be expected to be perfect. You

know, I will continue to show up and I will continue to learn as I go. But I do think that so much of what I've gone through has definitely made me a better leader. Also in terms of just like

leader. Also in terms of just like knowing I think that I found more so a confidence in what a good leader looks like for me.

What is that leader like?

That leader is so just to give some context like before I really thought being a good leader meant you know like I need to be available at all times. I

need to like no matter what I'm going through I need to show up at the office.

I need to be the first one there, the last one to leave. I need to you know if somebody calls me in the middle of the night like I have to pick up. I have to know everything. So, if anybody wants

know everything. So, if anybody wants help, I need to be able to jump in. And

being a hands-on person is not equivalent to being a good leader. And I think that throughout the years of running the company, I have learned that for me,

being a good leader means that I'm available when people need me to be, but not at all times.

Being a leader means a lot of different things, but that's a very short answer.

Did you have exposure to entrepreneurs like when you were growing up or are you like the first entrepreneur of your family?

Yeah, I am. I did not have exposure to it and I did not have exposure to any sort of like running a business or you know like self-funding a business or

even like allowing yourself to dream that big. Sometimes my mom will be like,

that big. Sometimes my mom will be like, "How did dad and I like create you? Like

how did you become all that you are today?" And I mean, I give so much

today?" And I mean, I give so much credit to them because they've always allowed me to be myself and they've always allowed me to be a little bit, you know, bigger and dream a little bit

bigger. And I really think that their

bigger. And I really think that their confidence in me has really given me the confidence to feel like I can do anything. So you and Rasmus

anything. So you and Rasmus run Jerf Avenue.

Yeah.

Who like describe the the Jerf Avenue employee to me? Like, is this like the cool girl that's from Sweden? Is she

like moving from a small town in Europe to work for you? Like, is she a fan? Is

she someone who actually doesn't know who you are? Like, who stands out and who works in this office? That's like

that is the Jerf Avenue girl or guy. In

the beginning when we started hiring, we hired very young. Like from like 2021 to probably like 2023, I think the like the age like what's it called? Like the

medium Yeah. Yeah. The median age.

Yeah. Yeah. The median age.

Yeah. was probably like 21.

Wow. So we were a very young company like not only in terms of like how many years we've actually had the business but also like in the terms of like the people at the company and at that time it was very like very young everybody

was like their first job straight out of school and today it's a little bit more and then we have I will say we also had a period where we like started hiring a lot more senior people in terms of like

experience but also in terms of age and I think that now we have a really sweet spot of having a good mix of like some people are younger and they have more of that like Jerf Avenue like essence in

them like this style and their way of thinking and like the community and then we have some that are more like coming from the outside but really are so inspired by what Jer Avenue is and they

want to be like they want to tap into it. So I think that today it's more of

it. So I think that today it's more of like a good mix where so before it was a little bit too young or like too senior and now I feel like we have like a good

you know a good mix of people.

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And make sure you use our link so that they know we sent you. So, when you do something like Selfridges, how does that come to be when you first hear about it at the office to like you are now

launching at Selfridges?

Oh my god, Selfridges, when I think about it, I'm like, how did we even do that? Um,

that? Um, it's like an iconic institution. It

really is. And we do not have like, you know, some companies still have like somebody on wholesale and, you know, they have like a like a team for it. We

do not have that. That's why I'm like, how did we do it? But we did it. Um, and

we did it because our team, like our team members, they're just so passionate and they're so determined to get things done. So, I really feel grateful for

done. So, I really feel grateful for that passion because I've always said that like passion can take you anywhere.

And it really did take us to Selfridges.

So, that was really, really fun. Um, but

yeah, I remember Selfridg just reached out and Alex told us and I was like that's actually insane cuz like as a young girl when you travel to London it's like you always go to Selfridges.

It's just like a non-negotiable. I'm

like what do you mean your family might be there but I'm also one of those people that like until I sign a paper I don't fully let myself enjoy it. Like I

want to I want something to be signed.

I need to learn a page out of your book because like I will my husband will come home and I'm like guess what happened and it's like the first intro message.

I'm like it's gonna happen and I'm manifesting it and he's like babe you cannot celebrate until you have a signed contract and then like 90% of the time they fall apart and he's like I hate to tell you but I like I feel like it

should be a mix of both cuz sometimes I'm also like I really should be celebrating at an earlier stage cuz then when everything is signed I'm kind of like moving on to the next thing. So, I

feel like a good mix would be beautiful, but I think that yeah, I'm just not good at celebrating until something is signed. And with Selfridges, it took a

signed. And with Selfridges, it took a very long time cuz it's not like we did not like it wasn't like an agreement that we signed. It was a purchase order.

Um, and that was very like Yeah, it was a very long time period where I was like, will this happen? Will it fall through? Like, what's going to happen?

through? Like, what's going to happen?

But then when that was like when the purchase order came in, I was like, oh my god, yes. Are you a manifesttor?

I am. Yeah. I actually very like sidetracked but a sweet story. I was for the Hamilton anniversary. I love that I can always find ways to come back to Hamilton

but for the Hamilton anniversary I like looked through old photos and I found an old document that I had written. I think

this was like 2013 or something and I wrote about being on a plane to New York and it was like it was very very sweet.

It was like in a few years I will be on the same like I will be on a plane to the US and I will have like the entire world ahead of me like I can achieve anything that I want like in a few years I'll be sitting on the same plane with

my dreams achieved yada yada and I don't remember writing it but when I looked at it I was like that is really sweet queen of manifestation.

It's really sweet. What are you manifesting right now? Both for you and for Jerf and for gathered. So for me, I'm just everything that I'm manifesting

right now is like very much connected to our wedding. For Jerf, I am manifesting

our wedding. For Jerf, I am manifesting a permanent store. Okay. Love New York.

I feel like it probably will be New York, right?

New York.

Yeah, I think so. I'm like I really think so. Um and then for gathered, I am

think so. Um and then for gathered, I am manifesting. I'm really excited again

manifesting. I'm really excited again like about the Harvard Gathered, but I'm manifesting something that's a more um at a bigger scale.

Can we talk about your wedding a little bit?

Yeah.

Okay. So,

there's not much to say unfortunately.

Okay. But more like you and Rasmus.

Yeah.

So, you guys started dating when you were how old?

17. He was 18.

You've been together for obviously over a decade.

Yeah.

What is your one lesson or piece of advice that you have to keep a relationship working over a decade?

So many. I feel like the biggest thing is like always being interested in each other. I think that like throughout the

other. I think that like throughout the years like what I find really fun and really fascinating, something that I love is like all the different versions that I have seen Rasmus in and like I've seen him grow from being this like

teenager to like being this young adult to like you know when we moved in together and then he became a dog dad and then he became like you know we became founders together and I think

we've just I've seen him through so many different chapters of his life and to keep being interested and keep choosing him to like actively choosing each other

is really beautiful. And I think that in a relationship you have to actively choose one another always cuz I think sometimes it's easy to just be you know like well and obviously if you even heard on

Chrissy's podcast she was like I couldn't work with someone that I was in a relationship with because it was like we never were able to turn off. So I

love being able to shine a light on the other side where it's like you guys have successfully worked together. You've

been through super high highs, super low lows. Like, how do you keep that dynamic

lows. Like, how do you keep that dynamic so exciting, but also professional when you're in the office?

When we're in the office, I think we just kind of like, you know, we just go into this mode where it's like we can't kiss. Sometimes I'll call

kiss. Sometimes I'll call I would hate that.

No, it's sometimes he'll be like, "Baby," and I'm like, "Oh my god, no.

Did I call you that?"

Um, so it's obviously something that we're always working on, but I think it's more so like when we're at the office, we have like I mean we have completely different schedules. Some

days I won't even see him and like our lives look really different when we're at the office. So it's not that difficult. And then sometimes we'll, you

difficult. And then sometimes we'll, you know, sneak away for a kiss when nobody can see us like teenagers. And I also think that's like sweet and like add something to it. But I said like he's my

best friend. We have so much fun

best friend. We have so much fun together and he always makes me laugh.

And I think that just, you know, it just does something to a relationship.

When you guys were figuring out even starting a business together, were you like, "Let's get serious about contracts and like how much each other owns and like set everything up from the beginning or did you just like kind of

just use trust as like your biggest guardian angel as you guys started building things together?"

Yes. Okay.

Contracts. No, just trust. I love that you thought that though.

Oh, girl, like my husband and I are psychos. We have like a contract and

psychos. We have like a contract and operating agreement for everything.

Honestly, good for you. Um, no, we were just like I think also like we never thought would be what it is today. Like

we really didn't think it would be. So I

think that when we started, we're like, "Okay, you're going to own this percentage. I'm going to own this. Let's

percentage. I'm going to own this. Let's

just start." And then now we're like, "Oh, it's really difficult to like actually make changes to a contract." So

now it's just a lot of trust and building a life together and like owning properties like owning houses and apartments and you know like we just yeah there's a lot of mutual trust.

Well you guys have been together for such a long time so it's like I think that there's a level of that trust that you earn. Are you someone that gives

you earn. Are you someone that gives trust right away or someone has to earn your trust?

Someone has to earn my trust.

I think I've also like been burned through many like too many times in my life where it's like I don't Yeah, I don't trust anyone. You in the beginning, not at first, you know, you

had to I'm very much like a relationship person. I've always like my therapist is

person. I've always like my therapist is like she always explains me as this like you like you're such a relationship builder like you really thrive on

building relationships with people and that's like a pro anacon. Um, but for me, yeah, I'm very much like trust is earned. But it's not that

difficult to earn it, though.

Okay. So,

so like at your wedding, are you going to be one of those people that has like 300 people cuz you're big on relationships or like 50 people?

Like 100.

Okay. So, you have your guest list.

We've tried to like That's the worst.

Yeah. I mean, you got married last year.

I've got married twice to the same person. One was 12 people in our

person. One was 12 people in our backyard and one was 250 people. And I

will say my husband's list was like 200 of that and I had 50. He just he was like I've waited 47 years to get married. Like I am doing this and I'm

married. Like I am doing this and I'm doing a bit really sweet.

Super sweet. But the guest list was hard. And we even went for lunch

was hard. And we even went for lunch with someone this weekend. And he goes I got your save the date and didn't get the invitation. And I was like oh why

the invitation. And I was like oh why didn't you say anything?

Why didn't you say anything? Weddings

bring everything to the surface. It

really does. like relationships,

friendships, issues, you see supportive people, like everything.

Are you having bridesmaids?

Yes.

Okay. So, you're doing like a little bit more of a traditional wedding.

Yeah, I think that I was actually speaking to my friend the other week and I was saying just that that I think that my wedding will be a little bit more traditional than people think it will be. And are you making a moment out of

be. And are you making a moment out of it with Jer? Like you're going to do like you know how some people that own brands they do like a collab for their bachelor party or like these things. Are

you going to try to combine two? Oh, you

best believe I will. Duh.

Okay. I was like I was in a meeting with Alice and Matilda who's in our production like we're this like little production team and I was like Alice who's the designer she's amazing. Um and

I was like we need to design like bachelorette like wedding guest like morning of like everything. and she came back to me. She was like, "I built out this story line where it's like from

January through like when you're getting married." Like it's kind of like a

married." Like it's kind of like a Taylor Swift song. It's like it kind of like builds to the actual wedding. And

I'm like, "Girl, yes." It's really sweet. Oh my god. Wait, so have you just

sweet. Oh my god. Wait, so have you just have you told outwardly you don't have to? But do people know when you're

to? But do people know when you're getting married?

No.

Okay. So, I'm going to ask you offline.

Okay. Matella Jerf, I could talk to you forever. You will probably have to come

forever. You will probably have to come on a second time, but can we do a little rapid fire?

Yeah. What is the last thing you put on your credit card?

An iced vanilla latte.

Love from where?

Alfred's.

What is the last most expensive thing you put on your credit card?

The last Well, I'm trying to source a Chanel bag that I want to put it on my Gabler.

Yes, Gab. She's sourcing it for me. So,

which one is it? A Matsu. Yeah. Okay.

Tell us more.

I mean, I wish I knew the name of it. I

don't. I just found it and I loved it.

It's this like burgundy like perfect little Yeah, I know. I know. Literally

everything burgundy. Imagine if I had it here.

That's what you'll come back on. You'll

bring it.

Exactly.

Okay. You've done a collab with both Sophia Richie Graange and Haley Bieber.

Who is next on your list? So for me, beauty is I love beauty and I love wellness and I love like you know supplements and things and I really want to do like a Jerf Avenue go slow like

berries kind of like a magnesium like powder or like like with lei like a little gummy or just like something or like with a ray you know like a little flavor like something that's very like

connected to like going slow like slowing down in your PJs and your robes.

Love.

Yeah.

Love. Okay, we're going to manifest it for you. Thanks. You can only pick one

for you. Thanks. You can only pick one for the rest of your life. Your eyes

just go crazy. I don't like this. A good

blowout or a slow Saturday morning with your two boys. That's rude. That's not

okay. Um, damn. I'm going to have to sacrifice the blowout.

There you go.

Imagine me. You know that she loves you.

I'm going to have to sacrifice ruin wrath. I would never.

wrath. I would never.

You can only use one for the rest of your life. A Dyson Air Wrap or a road

your life. A Dyson Air Wrap or a road peptide lip treatment?

A Dyson Air Wrap.

Okay. I need it for my hair. I'm like

cuz otherwise I would have to do like a round brush.

Yeah. No,

that's not that's not going to work for you.

No. I need to save time.

Okay. New York City or LA? To live.

To live. Like LA. LA.

Mhm.

Right now, I would probably say New York City. I never thought I would say that,

City. I never thought I would say that, but I love New York. What neighborhood

would you live in?

I love Tribeca.

Okay, I love that's such a good answer.

You can also only pick one for the rest of your life. Being really

are not fun.

I'm being really mean to you today. A

comfy robe or an oversized blazer moment.

I think I have to go for a comfy robe.

Really? Okay.

Or wait, do No, you're such an oversized like comfy robe moment.

Yeah.

Like little icons everywhere. Yeah, but

also like an oversized bler. I was going to wear my bler today, but I was like, I can't. That's all I wear. I love an

can't. That's all I wear. I love an oversized bler cuz you can wear it with like active wear and you know with like you're going into board meeting, you're going to lunch dinner. That's difficult.

What would you do?

Oversized blazer. I'm actually going to buy a Drip Avenue robe after this because I've been wearing my husband's like XXL and it's just not a vibe.

It's just not a vibe. I do these things called HSR love notes because I have a very toxic brain and they're basically an affirmation that like retrains my brain to think positively about myself.

If you could only tell yourself one HSR love note for the rest of your life, what would it be called?

What would it be?

Maggie, I don't know.

In crisis, there's growth.

Yeah, I guess.

Let's do that one.

Okay.

If you could title this season of your life, what would it be called? I would

do it, you know, like the trailers for like the 2000 movies. Yeah. Where it's

like Matula woke up one day and I would do something like really powerful.

Something about like, you know, she's stepping into like this new kind of like era where she feels like very confident, you know, like turns out the

critics steps into herself, you know, just like poom poom poom.

Love it. Matilda Derf, where can people find you?

everywhere.

Literally. No. Instagram, YouTube,

Substack, Tik Tok.

Do you have a favorite platform?

Instagram. Okay. Oh, fully.

It's where I connect with everyone. It's

like where my community is, where Jerp's community is. I love DMs.

community is. I love DMs. Okay.

I love DMs. Like, I love being in my DMs. I'm not even going to ask for your number. I'm just going to DM you and be

number. I'm just going to DM you and be like, "Girl, I'm in Sweden. Let's hang."

But please also ask for my email. That's

my number. I think that's going to be better. And last question. How can ASR

better. And last question. How can ASR help you?

We have September 3rd every year which is our Jerf Avenue holiday. Like it's a national holiday. I'm going to get into

national holiday. I'm going to get into the calendars worldwide. It started with us having a big event at Guggenheim. We

rented out the entire Guggenheim, like closed it down for a day, did a fashion show where the community walked, did a sit down dinner, 270 guests, and then an afterparty and the best vibes. And ever

since then, this was 2023. Ever since

then, we've been like, "Oh, we need to do something every September 3rd, which is a very unfortunate date cuz it's right after summer." So, it's a little difficult, but yeah, we're doing something really special this year. So,

we're going to give it to the HSR people. We're going to give you guys a

people. We're going to give you guys a tease soon. Gish Matilda Derf, thank you

tease soon. Gish Matilda Derf, thank you for coming on. Thank you for sharing so much of your story, being so vulnerable, and I can't wait to see what you do next.

Thank you for having me. This was so fun. Good. Can we do it again?

fun. Good. Can we do it again?

Yes. I'm just going to move into this beautiful house.