Shaolin Warrior Master: Hidden Epidemic Nobody Talks About! This Modern Habit Is Killing Millions!
By The Diary Of A CEO
Summary
## Key takeaways - **Purpose is personal, not universal**: Your purpose isn't fixed; it's deeply personal and can evolve. It's about finding what makes you feel alive and how you want to contribute, rather than chasing external validation or a singular definition. [08:14], [10:34] - **Don't let 'doing' overshadow 'being'**: Constantly striving for goals can stem from a place of lack. True fulfillment comes from 'being' present and connected, rather than an endless cycle of 'doing' to prove your worth. [22:09], [23:54] - **Break patterns by training new behaviors**: Habitual behaviors are patterns. To change them, you must consciously train new ones through consistent practice, much like physical training builds strength. [28:44], [33:31] - **Embrace discomfort to grow**: Growth doesn't happen in your comfort zone. Regularly exposing yourself to challenging situations, even small ones, expands your capacity and builds resilience. [40:48], [42:03] - **Self-control requires awareness, not just discipline**: Discipline alone isn't enough; you need awareness to recognize the moments when desires or negative emotions arise. This awareness allows you to consciously manage your reactions. [43:10], [44:41] - **Let go of the past to embrace the future**: Holding onto past experiences and identities creates mental blockages. Releasing these attachments allows you to be open to new possibilities and live more freely in the present. [32:31], [48:49]
Topics Covered
- Focus is Key, Not Just Strength
- Modern Life's Choice Overload and Loneliness
- Purpose is Personal, Not Universal
- Don't Outsource Your Well-being
- The Power of Consistent Practice
Full Transcript
You said to me, "The key to breaking
this brick isn't strength necessarily.
It's the ability to really, really
focus." So, can you show me you smashing
this brick?
Master Shaw Hungi is the world's most
hardcore monk. He uses his decades of
knowledge and techniques to help people
control their minds and overcome
society's biggest problems. This world
is filled with so much choice that it's
difficult to take a decision which
direction to go. what is right to do.
And so there is a lot of suffering with
the skills that you are developing
through kung fu training involves
methods and practices that give you the
ability to do this. But there are five
hindrances that make it difficult for
you to still keep your goal in the mind.
There is sensory desires, ill will
dullness, restlessness, and then
self-doubt. And to overcome the five
hindrances, you recommend the four-step
rain method. Yes. And with this, I make
it super simple.
So many of us live in the same cycles of
unhappiness and suffering. I I witnessed
it in my life as well because I felt I
was never enough. My father and mother
put a lot of pressure in terms of you
need to prove yourself and so I did all
these type of practices and methods that
made it possible to be where I am right
now. I wanted the recognition by my
father but it didn't happen because your
father passed away from cancer. Yeah.
[Music]
How does one let go of that and
therefore break the pattern? I will show
you some practices. Number one
this has always blown my mind a little
bit. 53% of you that listen to this show
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continue to do what we do. Thank you so
much.
Master Sha
Hung, based on everything that's
happening in the world right now and the
work that you've committed your life to
what is the mission that you are on and
why is it so important right now?
I do think that in this
world there have always been different
streams, different forces.
One of them leading to the betterment of
humanity, one of them leading to the
destruction of humanity. And I do think
that there are types of wisdom and
knowledge existing out there that very
easily without any
additional help for anything
else can be very useful for the people
nowadays. Yeah, you don't need to go
anywhere. The only thing you need to do
is take a moment, contemplate about
yourself, go into
yourself and find the answers there and
then decide for yourself which part and
what type of contribution would you like
to give to the world that you're living
in. I ultimately think this is what I'm
doing. And what is it that you see
people struggling with? because so many
people write to you, they they send
messages to you, they come and see you.
What is it that you hear they're
struggling with at a fundamental level?
I would say it's diversity and choice.
This world is filled with so much choice
meanwhile that it's difficult in a way
to take a decision which direction to
go, what is right to do, what is not
right to do. But ultimately, it's only
yourself who knows the answer. Which
means it comes to the essential
point. Learn more about yourself. This
is where it starts because if you have
the wrong perspective of who you are
what you are, everything else in this
lifetime you base your decisions on is
just not not going to
be placed in the right direction.
And what are the the other things that
you hear people suffering with on a
daily basis in the modern world with the
way that the world is now? It's
digitalized. We're lonier than ever.
Mental health seems to be surging. What
are the like fundamental things they say
to you or that that you in infer through
what they're saying that they are
actually struggling with? So choice
overload of choice and an inability to
make a clear decision is number one.
So being perfectly honest, I usually do
not very much rely on what the people
tell me, what they
think, what problem they have. It's just
that I look and I can see already what I
think you need. And foremost one of
these and it's very
simple non-religious nothing about
believing it simply is the fact you
don't use your body as it is intended to
be very
simple. Yeah. You we you you sit many
people sit too much during the day. The
body is not active at all. A lot of work
a lot of energy investment is done with
the mind.
less energy investment is done really
with the body and that simply means for
me I can see there's a
disbalance whoever created us he did not
create us to sit with our butt on one
place and do thinking work the whole
time I do think a part of why we have
been created is to get out on the field
and just do something out there and what
is the cost
of not utilizing our body in the way
that it was meant to be utilized.
Unbalanced energies that can translate
into anxiety, that can translate into
dissatisfaction, that can translate into
continuously searching and never being
satisfied. And the most common thing
not
realizing how precious the moments are
that you
have. And instead of replacing them with
illusions and dreams and assumptions
which are just not
real meaning everybody is not even
Buddhist, it's not Shaolin. It is common
understanding. We don't know if we wake
up tomorrow. It is like this. Yeah. But
our plans go. We have five years plans
10 years plans. We have short-term
midterm plans. Yeah. The truth is we
don't know if we wake up
tomorrow. So of course I don't want to
make it like in sound negative. So just
live in the present moment without
planning. This is not what I'm saying.
But this is the challenge nowadays. How
do you balance out vision?
vision with
reality. Real the only thing real right
now is this. That's real for us. I can
feel it. You can hear it. You can sense
it. This is real. you nearly broke my
table and I was concerned because um
later on you will
be proving to me that you can break this
brick using your your mind and the
physical um preparation that you've done
which I find really really interesting
cuz I tried to smash this brick on the
floor and I couldn't. So all of the
things you talk about understanding
one's physical mind and and mastering it
but also understanding one's physical
body will find out if you can smash
through this brick. But on this point, I
I wanted to talk about an adjacent
subject, which is really like purpose
what to do with one's life. And if we're
spending a little bit too much time
thinking off into the future um and not
enough time thinking in the present
moment, I'm wondering how purpose and
having a having a big dream for one's
life fits into this equation and if we
should have a purpose and if so, how do
we find our purpose?
So absolutely there is the field of
becoming conscious. Consciousness is a
big field. Then we have science is is
another very very big field. So some say
okay is it that consciousness creates
matter or is it the other way around?
Which one is which one is the
fundamental basis? What is the basis of
our interaction? So the truth is the
fact right now is regardless of science
no science how our evolution developed
right now we are here your body my body
we are
here this is what we are having right
now at the same time in the way of how
this lifestyle at the moment is we won't
have more than 50 more years to go in
that
body so very simple
without believing living without any
religious aspect. Once again, the truth
is the lifetime of what you carry right
now and what I carry right now, it's
limited. And now just imagine you would
be let's say the director of your own
movie. Jump out of the body and watch
yourself right now. You are sitting like
with Shi. We sit on the same table and
you are writing your story.
How do you want to write the story? You
want to afterwards, after this podcast
you want to like feel
uncomfortable, feel unsafe, feel
unloved, feel like being just
unsatisfied with the whole life, cry or
anything like this or how do you imagine
what is a a a really nice way of living
for you the next 50 years. So and based
on
that purpose can be
different. You say I do like the travel.
I I do like to invest this lifetime in
this body to have the feeling at least
that I can contribute something to all
the fellow um brothers and sisters that
are around there. It makes me like I
wake up I like to do it. It gives me
purpose. So it is something very very
personal.
And which also means that in a way
speaking in in these terms right now I
do not believe that every human being
has the same purpose when it comes to
this type of
purpose but now there's another type of
purpose which is more or less personally
for me why do I
think that in the first place we have
been put with all these
possibilities and
uh positively said I do think it is a
blessing being able to just
experience. It's a blessing that we have
been granted the possibility of
simply experiencing what this existence
is capable of creating. including
everything, including the joy, including
the happiness, including the tears
including the heartbreaks, all of this
without the separation. Whether you
prefer one area or
not, the one sometimes the one goes with
the
other. But the purpose in a way is just
be and
experience. The only thing that happens
and which is a big part nowadays is if
you
take your current existence too
serious. If you completely base your
identity your
being on what you think you
are. But like I said, it's just a
picture right now. Yes. But just
sometimes make it very simple. jump out
of yourself and be the director. Be the
director of this
avatar and then it just opens another
perspective because in that moment you
just realize it's like a movie.
Not everything is always
positive but in the moment where there
are times of struggle
still not being caught inside your own
creation
identity
identity illusion of the self different
expressions for that it's a very helpful
way of thinking let's put it like this
because there are so many people that
say they are struggling to find meaning
in their life or they feel
purposelessness And you know, I get so
many messages from people all over the
world saying that they um they're saying
things like, "Is this it? Is this all my
life is?"
So, this is
literally also one one point that you
just mentioned is that it isn't there
more. That has always been a part that
followed me along the way. Yeah.
Especially now in the last three four
years after social media the algorithm
of social media really started also
pushing pushing us quite out
there. More requests were coming of
doing workshops, of doing podcasts, of
teaching here, of teaching there, of
making television show, of participating
in movies. And of course all together
with this doors start to open, different
things start to come in. But at some
point I just couldn't believe that this
is supposed to be the
purpose because it all still had to do
like had to do with
doing the constant
doing. Yeah. And there I felt in my life
now looking at this this couldn't be it.
So I I look for alternatives always and
always again especially feeling that
along the way of what you would say
achieving something being recognized at
something. Yeah. But the there's a
there's another side that goes hand in
hand with it that the public doesn't
see. There were times I could simply be
surrounded with like thousands thousands
of people but still feel
lonely. is not what you're surrounded
with, it's with what you are
connected. Yeah. And there I felt like
there is always again this type of
force. What is it that drives you
on? Going outwards, going outwards
going outwards, you lose
yourself. But this self is the only
thing that can give you connection in
this life. And what do you need to be
connected to then? You talked about
being surrounded by thousands and being
lonely and it's really about what you're
connected to. What does one need to be
connected to?
Maybe before I answer you this question
there's one thing I maybe want to like
mention beforehand. So when I went to
elementary school and also during my
school time, I actually for example
joined Christian Christian lesson. Yeah.
So by my parents I grew up with Buddhist
tradition let's say from the martial art
training I also got introduced into
so-called Zen
Buddhism because my father always told
me look son we are here in a foreign
country you're a foreigner it's always
better to have friends than to have
enemies that's why I made always friends
with everyone meaning I had a lot of
Russian friends I had a lot of Arab
Arabic friends. I had a lot of Turkish
friends.
Multicultural also meaning at some point
I also got like introduced into
Islam. Bottom line
is taking all of this knowledge from the
past into my
mind. No matter from which angle I'm
watching right
now, I do
believe that we all have a source.
There is a
source. So whether you call that source
is the
universe, whether you call the source it
is the God, whether this source is is
the the the infinite energy, I don't
know. There's so many different
expressions to
it. But when I look at all these
teachings, all are always pointing at
one and the same thing.
Let's just take the expression of yin
and yang. Yes, the symbol everybody
knows in the world. And there is that
nice saying yin and yang have a
mother. The mother sometimes simply
being illustrated as one
circle. So yin and yang as the
expression from duality, polarity
existence of number two. Yeah. Where do
the two come from? They must come from
one.
So simple like in our way you are there
I am here one two where do we come from
there must be something that we have as
a common
denominator and this source is the only
thing that can connect
us because it's not your family it's not
my family they're still different that
is not
enough going just looking at we are
humans animals
name. Whatever and whoever gave us the
possibility to be here is the same who
gave you the permission is the same who
gave me the permission and the blessing.
And this is what I think this is the
level of mind. This is the level of
connection that never leaves you
lonely. This this is the one that I that
I mean being connected to the source.
Yes. Now, for someone that is listening
to this and is confused at this juncture
and they're asking themselves, what is
that source? You've described it in in
many potential ways, but it's the my
attempt at describing it is it is
ultimately where we came from. That is
that is the source. Is there a better
way of describing it for people that
might be unfamiliar with the concept?
First of all, I cannot speak without it
and it would make sense to everyone.
That's already the first very very
difficult part. That's why my intention
is never to say what is it. The only
thing I can do is to to like give
pointers. But ultimately there's only
one person who will be able to find it
out and it's not me finding it out for
somebody
else. Everybody will find out for
himself or herself. So every human
being I do think is at a different level
of his um of his growth of his
development and everybody gets what he
needs exactly in the moment where he is
in which is why I think everybody at
this moment in time is exactly where he
needs to be for the next elevation to
take place. The only thing you need to
do is look at yourself right now and
just find out what is
it that makes you
unhappy. What exactly is it that at this
moment in your life is binding
you and restricting you from moving on?
And this is the same question for
everyone. But the what you ultimately
need to tackle is different. In the
past, I sometimes played Super Mario and
Luigi. And it's the same. If you don't
like manage level number one, you won't
see level number two. The challenges
from number two won't come. The end boss
from number two is not going to come.
First, you finish level one. But once
number one is finished, you won't face
the same stuff
anymore. And there is something along
this line where it sometimes is like a
game at the same time.
Don't take it so serious helps.
On that point of we're all struggling
with something based on the levels we're
at. If you had to try and
summarize what the common answer is to
what people are struggling with, what do
you think that might be? I was thinking
about my um my best friends cuz
sometimes it's easier to step outside of
oneselves and look at others and I was
reflecting on the conversations I've had
with them over the last couple of weeks
about things they're struggling with.
And I would define a lot of it as
wanting. So wanting to improve their
businesses, wanting to improve maybe
their romantic situations and find love.
I would say the essence of it, the
suffering seems to be striving for
something that they're unable to grab.
Um, but I wondered if you had a
different perspective on that. Two
things that right now would come to my
mind.
There is always the struggle between
doing and
being. I would ask why are you doing? So
why why do you want to go into action?
Mostly there is a
goal. The goal why do you have that
goal? because you're aiming at receiving
something that in the moment where you
where you have it apparently you are
lacking. So that means this type of goal
setting in in my perspective I would
automatically refer to it already that
your goal setting already comes from a
space of
lack. You feel like you're lacking
something. That's why you need to do you
feel like you're lacking something
that's why you need to educate yourself
that okay so this is the one
direction now coming back maybe sounds
again too
philosophical connected with the
source there's nothing to add and
there's nothing to take away from
you so apparently when somebody has this
very very high ambition of doing
something achieving
something, then most likely the chances
are there. This is not coming from a
connection to the
source. It is coming from the idea of
wanting to nourish or create an
identity. An
identity that represents something that
you think you want to
represent. Yeah. So this is the one area
the doing versus the being. And then the
second thing is that ultimately goes
hand in
hand with this way of living your life
is that you for that that one thing is
being forgotten along the along the
line. The truth
of that whoever and whatever you are
creating and are intending to create and
are intending to gather now and and
starting to um to attain
things your attainment maximum it's
going to last 100
years. That is the other truth.
So
and I do believe people understand
exactly what I
said. But there comes the fight now
again. The fight between
Yes. between this very strong identity
that wants to just maintain
itself and the other side of just forget
about your
identity. Be as you are. That's it.
No matter what you're going to attain
you have it for 100 years afterward is
gone. So just be don't stress yourself
too much with what you don't
have. Well
unfortunately, and this is always going
to continue like this. Unfortunately
there are always three ways how you
going to learn this.
Sometimes people just need to have the
experience to realize okay I did it I
got it now I realize I don't need it but
in the first place you need to have it.
First way of
learning second way of learning you do
trust a certain teacher you do trust a
certain guide or a
mentor you just copy the way how he's
living his life. So your approach is you
just copy because you see oh apparently
the person lives a good life. So you
just copy. Second way of learning. And
the third way of learning is you maybe
have like a teacher or a master. He
tells you some wise words. You
contemplate about it. You think about it
and because you were thinking about it
it already puts you on the alternative
path without you needing to try it for
yourself. So, and there will always be
people in this world in these three
categories because you know simply said
telling somebody look don't don't put
your hand in the
fire. They're still going to do it but
later is when they do it like two times
three times then it's done. But a lot of
people never get the thing that they're
pursuing. So, you know, someone might
say I want to be a millionaire or I want
to have a this Lamborghini sports car.
The majority of people who aspire to
that statistically won't ever reach it.
So they'll spend their whole life just
in pursuit. They'll never get the lesson
of path one where you try it and you
realize
that. So but maybe that is also already
the lesson involved in this person's
life. You have this goal in the mind.
you you put all your energy, all your
effort into trying to achieve that.
You're 20 years old, you're trying.
You're 30 years old, you're trying. 40
years already, you're still trying. 50
years, you still haven't let go of the
idea.
Well, at some point
hopefully you see
exactly
that that senseless approach of how you
personally already wasted 30 years of
following a goal with the conclusion of
two things. Number one, you haven't
achieved it yet or number two, you
didn't had the right way of achieving
it. But the bottom line is you have two
ways now. What to do? let go of the idea
that you need it and and redirect your
life
or redirect your
approach of how you still want to
achieve that goal if you don't want to
let go of it. But apparently one of
these two things is is not right.
And the more you want your life now
let's say in the future to be quite
different than what you're used to, the
more you need to be able to let
go. Let go of patterns. Let go of the
way of thoughts that you had in the in
the last years and months. Now, if
nothing changes about that, there will
not come a new life.
So many of us live in patterns, the same
cycles, and we we end up getting the
same results and those results result in
unhappiness and suffering. And I was
speaking to a friend over the weekend
about how one of our other friends has
lived in a bit of a pattern and they've
been able to unable to find love and
companionship because of some things
that happened when they were younger. I
think they were bullied. So they have
this sort of deeper sense of having to
prove themselves and insecurity. And
this shows up all the time because when
they meet someone, they present a facade
which might not necessarily be accurate.
And then very quickly the relationship
ends because it was never real in the
first place. But this person's now aware
of it, but it's still happening over and
over again. They're still living out the
same pattern in their life and still
getting the same results and
dissatisfaction. So when we think about
trauma at an early age that results in
this sort of cyclical pattern of getting
same behavior, same results. I wondered
if you had a perspective on how one can
let go of that and therefore break the
pattern. So let me draw you a picture.
I was a four fouryear-old
boy having father and
mother Asian
origin being refugees from Vietnam Laos
meaning
they they ran away from the
war coming to Europe coming to Germany
with the idea that for the children to
have a better security on the one side
feeling more safe in Germany without the
instability that they witness in their
own country. And so of course father and
mother with this
idea put a lot of pressure in early ages
already in terms of you need to be good
at school, you need to achieve, yeah
you need to prove yourself. So this is
the education from father and mother. At
the same time, with the age of four, I
went into a Shaolin kung fu school
learning martial arts. And every martial
artist practitioner probably knows
teachers and masters usually are not the
ones telling you, "Oh, yes, you did that
very good. Yes, very well." No, they
they just say, "Okay, more, deeper
faster, harder." So bottom line is from
the age of four growing up the only
thing that in the way I felt was
actually you're never
enough. No matter what I brought home in
terms of grades if it was a B why was it
not A? If it was a A why is it not A+?
If I did already 100 push-ups question
is why don't you make 150? Yeah. If I
was fast already it was still not fast
enough. So constantly this type of never
enough. Okay. Ultimately meaning and
this is all now I can just tell you 40
years later but now I can see it.
Ultimately meaning that at some point
this little boy started simply to build
up a shield. Build up such a shield to
be less dependent anymore on what other
people think about me.
Meaning I just started to rely
everything in my life purely on what I
think at the same time building up
emotional blockages and emotional walls
nothing to penetrate and at the same
time also nothing to express to the
outside.
So now having entered into like a very
new circumstance in my life where I need
to take into consideration the opinion
and the emotional state yeah of my
beloved of my partner of my
son. I can feel how my old patterns
sometimes are still trying to sneak in.
And so the only thing to do is what to
do to break patterns. Number one, you
need to see you have one. And number
two, you need to replace old patterns
which ultimately mean patterns. It's
habitual behavior. It's it's habits. How
do you build habits by
continuous behavioral patterns that you
continuously do? So there is something
about consistency and continuity that
ultimately builds a pattern.
So and this is now where for example in
this field of martial arts that's
exactly what it's
about consistency of having a training
regimen every
day. This is yeah it's not helpful to
like six days per week do nothing and
then you go one day to the gym and and
give your everything. No, it's better
you have some type of consistency
throughout the whole day. This is what
builds patterns, healthy
patterns. Yeah. And so similar like this
I would describe now what is somebody
supposed to do? Number one, look at
yourself and see yourself. We are all
not
perfect, but according to the
circumstances that you are facing right
now
today, what type of character do you
think with what do you want to equip
your
character that he is able to go through
this current times in the best possible
manner? What is not useful for you
anymore, try to get rid of it. and get
your new skills in and then train those
and then train of course those new
patterns. We don't often think about
training some of the virtues that we
want to acquire and the patterns we want
to have. We we kind of think that we
have to select them and then we'll do
our best to live them. But the idea that
I might have to
train certain new behaviors is a really
compelling one because you're right, in
the context of any physical development
I have to go to the gym and I have to do
my repetitions to build that thing, that
strength. But I um was just thinking
about creating a training regimen for
for certain behaviors
um and new patterns that I want in my
life and trying to make sure I do them
every day, which is not something that
I've I've ever considered. Three months
ago, you became a dad to a young boy to
a young son. Yes. Um, so you're now in
the process of raising a man yourself.
And there's a lot of dialogue at the
moment in the UK, but also just broadly
in the Western world around what it is
to be a man and how to to raise men. I
think much of this dialogue has been
sparked by some shocking statistics that
show young men are struggling now more
than ever in various ways. Um, I think
the single biggest killer of men under
the age of 45 is themselves. And also
there's just an overarching sense of I
think purposeless meaninglessness that
they're struggling in school more so
than women are. Some forecasts predict
that for every two women that graduate
university or college only one man will
graduate um in the near future. And it's
pretty it's pretty shocking. So when I
think about the way that you're intent
on raising your young your young man
but also what it is that young men in
particular are missing in their lives, I
wondered if you had had an answer from
this
moment. There's one thing I can tell by
myself what I would absolutely prevent
when it would come, let's say, to the
education or what I share with my son.
Like I said, I felt I was never enough.
There was always something that
additionally needed to be done. So
which literally means for me for my son
there is nothing to be done. There is
nothing he has to
achieve. If there if there would be
something it is stay
connected. So in terms
of I don't see myself as somebody who is
now having the responsibility to shape
my son. No, I only provide the
framework. I try to provide the most
safe framework for my son. He can try
out whatever he wants. If he fails, he
will learn by himself to get up again
and keep trying. So you know to fail and
then to
continue. I just want to build up this
framework as good as I can to make him
feel safe. Yeah. But trial and error is
what I do believe is the way how you
find
yourself. So definitely not being
spoiled but at the same time also not
like keeping something away from him
where where I make him feel like he's
not enough. So ultimately I do think in
the modern way of how to express it in
all these attachment theories very
simple of course it's the secure the
secure way of being a
stable own selfmade
self-sufficient
individual who knows his own value. Why?
Because he failed and got up. Why do you
think so many young men are
struggling?
No. Whatever shows up right now at at
this moment. Yeah.
2025. It didn't start in 2025.
Whatever appears right now sometimes
it's the result of how things have been
handled, how the education has been from
previous years, whether it's the last 10
years, whether it's the last 20 years.
So it's not necessarily what did the
generation right now do did wrong, let's
say. No, it's also the question of what
did the previous generation missed to
keep passing on that ultimately led to
the result that we have nowadays. So
and this is the question
where where I do think it's
multi-layered.
You gave a a TED talk in 2020 almost 5
years ago now about the five hindrances
What are the five hindrances? You
describe them as five mental states that
are holding us back. Let's put the
context
first. Take it simple. Just you have a
goal setting. You set yourself whatever
goal it is, you have your
goal. So your mind is set on the goal.
Normally the five hindrances now simply
describe there are five mental states
that would actually make it difficult
for you to still keep your goal in the
mind whatever goal that is. So the
number
one for example is called sensual
desire.
Sensual desire means you are too
receptive for any type of pleasurable
feeling in regards to your five
senses. You're being too quickly attract
when you see something
beautiful. You're too quickly attract if
you smell something
tasty. You're too quickly distracted
when like you have like physical touch.
Yeah. So the first hindrance means you
you're losing the goal already because
in the moment something pleasurable is
being presented to you. Your your mind
has shifted
already. So that means that first mental
state only means look be aware of what
is it that you are very easily attracted
to. It doesn't say it's bad. It doesn't
say it's good. It just says in the
context of you want to reach your goal
how to reach the goal the quickest, be
focused with your energy. Meaning be
focused with the mind. Don't lose the
goal from the mind. Whatever you do from
the moment of waking up until the
evening, whatever you do, keep the goal
in the mind. This is the quickest way of
making this goal become real. Number
two, simply said, you don't like
discomfort. You you don't like
challenges. You don't like
hardship. In that TEDex talk, I
described it like you're like walking
along the path and then suddenly it
starts to rain, but you don't like rain.
So instead of you just continue follow
the path, you are starting to make your
mind busy about what you don't like.
Yeah. And already that means the mind
starts to shift again losing the focus
of the goal. So this
idea num hindrance number one, hindrance
number two, actually you can easily say
it like
this. This is the goal. Two things not
to
do. Spend your time
enjoying. Don't do this.
Or spend your time
rejecting that things are not the way
how you imagine them to
be. Both of these things, one is you
follow pleasure and the other thing
you're rejecting any challenges. Both of
these things is something to be aware of
when it comes to stay focused along the
path. When we think about this first
hindrance of sensual desire, is this
where discipline comes into play? The
idea of discipline because that word is
often used, but it's often lacking a
clear definition, but also a clear
understanding of how one attains and
exhibits discipline. Because when I
think about the things that require me
to have discipline, it is these desires.
It is the five gates. It is something I
want to eat. It is maybe um some kind of
touch that I want to have etc etc. So is
this where discipline is important?
No. Even for example like in the book or
even now when we talk about we have the
five hindrances, we have the 14 virtues
we have the eight rules, we have the
four here and the 13 here and the six.
Okay, it's a very good guideline because
it makes it easy for us humans to have
something like really structured. There
are there are four steps there are six
steps there are five steps
whatsoever what I want to say
is just in this way it's also that only
discipline wouldn't be helpful if in the
first place you do not possess the
ability
to see
it to realize it to be aware of
Meaning you have discipline but you are
never aware actually when is the moment
actually appearing right now that this
sensory desire is hitting in. You're not
aware of it. So the discipline wouldn't
help you if you don't have this
awareness. So always meaning I do think
that there are
different different qualities of the
mind that come into play for you
to to adjust yourself properly. I was
thinking about my friend when you
mentioned awareness there the friend I
described earlier who exhibits the same
pattern and although they might be aware
of the pattern they might say you know I
have this pattern I don't believe
they're aware
of the moment where that pattern begins
like this the singular trigger which
sends them in that in that loop so I was
and I was thinking the same about myself
I was like there's some behaviors that I
have that I don't like and although I'm
aware of them In the moment when it
happens, I might not be conscious that
it's the pattern has begun that the
someone has said something, something
has happened and then you go on that
pattern or you reach into the
refrigerator at 1:00 a.m. in the morning
and grab the thing or you end up being
triggered by something. So I wondered if
there's a practice at all to become
increase our awareness of the trigger
moment.
Yes.
This is for example where I very much
appreciate so many different teachings
that are meanwhile existing freely
available for example through the social
media including breath work including
yoga
practices all of them if you have a
proper
teacher I'm very sure that this is
exactly what is starting to raise your
awareness for something that in this
field when you are spending some time we
refer to as energy. If you're not aware
of your
own inner layer, let's say like
this, and somebody insults you, it can
happen that like somebody so somebody
insulted me and then I just started
exploding. Yeah. But the fact is before
something explodes, before I
explode, first of all, something must be
lit already. the the the small little
flame already must have been lit. So
when I already knew who is it that I'm
going to
meet maybe that already knowing hearing
the name from him already was
ah was already the starting point of a
potential explosion to happen. Yeah. So
then ah this was where when this little
flame already started being there and
then you literally can feel things like
this. You can feel when something is has
been injected, let's say, into you when
something starts to arise because when
the fire is already too big, when the
whole house is burning, you're not going
to you're not going to
[Music]
um put down that fire in any way. You
can only put down all of these fires
before things come too big. meaning we
must find a way to be directly grabbing
the root, grabbing the core or grabbing
the source of the
explosion. And the only way that I know
is you need to become more sensitive for
everything that goes on in your
body, in your surrounding, in
everything. This is where for me
awareness does play a
role and
yes and especially when it comes to
becoming aware of your emotional states.
This is absolutely inner work. This has
nothing to do with doing work out here.
It's inner work.
How does one begin the journey of doing
that inner work?
You give trust in the vision that when
you are investing your time right now to
become more aware
of yourself, of your emotional state
then this is going to benefit your life.
That's the starting point. You believe
in it. You believe in it. So you don't
do it because somebody tells you you're
supposed to do it. You do it because you
genuinely believe this is the way. Yeah.
I want to know more about
myself. I want to really understand what
is it that I am made out
of. You want to figure out is there
something inside of myself. I tried to
look away for many years but I know it's
still there and was afraid to look at
it. All of these
things. There's only one way to make
yourself free.
You need to become
transparent. Yeah. If there are if there
are spots inside of ourself where
there's no light
yet, it can't
be. It can't
be. Bringing
light to everything that has been in the
dark. This is another area of the past.
which at some point everybody will
face. Yeah. And even though that is is
even though that this is not just like a
saying
but just the
idea whatever you're doing whatever
you're thinking whether people are
around you or you are
alone just imagine there is one who
always sees what you're doing.
So live your life based on that.
And that person is you
also.
Who else is it? It is the elevated
version of you. But it's true. It's you
and you.
Once I've shone a light on that area of
me, so I have greater awareness of its
existence and it's now transparent.
Is it a case then of what is the work I
then have to do to make a change in that
in that context? So, we're talking here
about managing one's emotions and
getting a grip of one's emotions so you
can avoid being triggered or
perpetrating the same patterns in your
life that have led you to the same
outcomes. First, you you believe that
it's possible to to change. You gain a
greater awareness of the parts of
yourself that you've kept in the dark
that you might want to change. And then
what does one do from there? Because I
came let's say from this martial art
field. Yes. Also meaning the Dao is
teaching or the principles of yin and
yang have always been the part in
there. Let me put it like this.
Whatever you are
thinking, saying or
doing
has a
consequence. So this consequence that
you have created or that you are
intending to
create ask
yourself what is that consequence
actually? Does it make you yourself?
Does it make your being, your
interaction with
people, does it make it feel more
light, more pleasurable, more enjoying
more
free more
nourishing? Or is the result that you
are about to
create going in the other direction?
Meaning you're nourishing conflict. You
are nourishing aggression. Feeling like
you are carrying the suffering of the
world on your shoulder. Feeling like
there's a burden on you. Feeling like
there's a stone on your heart. Feeling
like you're being put under pressure.
See all of these expressions have
something to do with density. Have
something to do
with
pressure. Yeah. But then when we look at
no matter which tradition it is
Buddhism
enlightenment
freedom
liberation, elevation, no matter what it
is. You see, it is just two forces in
the
world. Two forces in the world. One
aiming for
limitlessness and the other one aiming
for restricting and very clear
boundaries. These are the two
forces.
So, and this is exactly now turning the
view upon
yourself. What are you made out of? Your
your patterns, the emotional states that
follow you within a
week. Within a week, looking back the
last week, what was the most dominating
emotion you felt inside yourself? Was it
one that had the character of limiting
yourself in a way or were you in an
emotional state like through the week it
was light it was liberated free
uplifting joyful which of these so and
this simply gives you exactly from what
to what do I think you need to transform
yourself if you want
this if you want this.
So
and why do I think that this is the
goal? Lightness. Lightness. Let's just
imagine after this
conversation, your best friend or your
best girlfriend going to ask you, so how
was this
conversation? And even so that we are
maybe just talking 3 hours, four hours.
Even if you spend two days long
explaining to your best friend how this
conversation was, it's not the
truth. It is not the
truth. How is this conversation? How is
this conversation? Even right now, we
cannot even speak about
it. I tell you how this conversation
right now really is. Yes.
How you want to describe
this? You only you will be the only one
ever
knowing how this
is. It doesn't matter who's going to ask
you afterwards what you're going to tell
them. You want to feel it, you need to
experience it. There is no other way.
And this is the this is the nature of
words. This is why these these ancient
stories come. For example, one master
and his student walk up on the mountain
early in the morning. Then the sun rises
up and then the student says, "Oh
master, what a beautiful sunrise." And
then like the master like slaps him and
never takes him to a walk uh anymore.
Then you say, "Why was the teacher so
hard to him?
Because in the moment where you give
something that you
experience a
word, you limit
its
nature. You you you naturally limit its
nature. So how does this now translate
into into what we can do with this
knowledge?
Whatever is being dense and it's
limiting I don't think it's the
way I think everything for us to
practice is look beyond
limitations look beyond the
words look beyond the shape practice to
look beyond the superficiality of
things because this is where the meaning
lies or this is
where part of
the part of the realization lies.
I think in my life I I want to be light
but the way that my life tends to
operate is I might aspire for that, but
then I fall into almost a bit of an
autopilot and I run the same pattern
throughout the week and the same I
respond in the same ways to the same
external external stim stimulus. So
although might one might aspire to be
freer and to be less agitated or to be
you know all those things I quickly fall
back into my old path my old autopilot
because life does seem to come at me
pretty quickly. Um if I look at my
calendar it's just full every day. So, I
wake up and like I woke up this morning
and I'm like with one eye open looking
at my phone schedule to figure out like
what day it is and what that means and
what I have to do and what's just
happened and oh, the podcast has gone
out and I've got this email from this
person and there's my calendar or when
I'm late for by 20 minutes and although
I might have the day before said to
myself that this week we're going to be
joyful and light and free, it feels like
the week hits me like a truck and then
boom autopilot.
So our goal is set in a way and now
comes the next realization. Just because
your goal is set doesn't mean this life
is going to give you exactly what you're
looking for.
meaning you really must make sure how
important is that goal really for
you because yeah I
uh I I witness it in my life as well. So
at some point I you know when it started
become a lot public you know the
calendar went full and at some point I
said to myself okay now it's becoming
too full let's start to let's start to
settle down a bit let's start to stay a
little bit more in the background. Yeah.
But then still like requests coming in
still and then you were think ah come
this one still. Yeah. But ultimately
it's really up to you how much do you
really want it and it is going to
continue like this until you will
ultimately come to the
point and it's going to come quickly I
do think
yeah where you realize for yourself that
that it's an
infinite that it's that it's an infinite
direction of possibible abilities. They
will never run out. But you will still
have to figure out what is it that you
really want from your
life. People will say, "Well, I want to
have a mansion and I would like to have
a private jet and I would like to have
a beautiful partner or I'd like to have
a
trophy." Valid. Absolutely
understandable as well.
But I do think that this
universe is going to let you realize
your lesson in the way how you need
it. Yeah. You're going to have your
mansion. You're going to have your
beautiful, beautiful wife. You're going
to have it all. There is something
that's going to put you back on
track. There is something that's going
to put you back on track. Telling you
you need to readjust.
It is why why why
why it has always been like
this. We come with
nothing. We go with
nothing. What does it
mean? This universe is going to make
sure that you going to go with nothing.
Which means at some point before it's
time for you to go, you will be faced
with the fact of learning the necessity
of letting go of what you have attained
in this
lifetime. And if you have not learned
and have not understood that this is
going to
come, then I think it's a very very hard
awakening. It's a very painful
awakening to realize to have this
realization that you have spent 70
years 80 years following your goal and
now there is no other choice. You have
to let
go.
So
yeah is not my
invention is just my observation.
And this is why in now maybe let's jump
a little bit there are literally in the
ancient traditions in the text of chan
Buddhism Zen Buddhism is very simply
said like this. How do you know that you
have practiced this past this tradition
in a in
a in a decent
manner? It is simply
by feeling inside yourself how easy, how
willing are you actually to let go of
what you
have. If you feel that you are mentally
attached to still things, still mentally
attached to
possession, you're far you're you're far
away from from the state of being what
this chan Buddhism, what this chan
teaching is uh wanting to like reveal to
you.
What it also means is if you have the
possibility of attaining everything that
you were speaking
about, you are absolutely happy to do
so. You are you can own
everything. It's never about promoting
to have this is not good. No, but to
have attachment at least in this type of
tradition will have consequence.
So it's not about what is it that you
possess. It's
about what of these possessions are
possessing
you. That's it. And therefore, is it
possible to possess things and to pursue
the possession of things while
also having a relationship with them
where they don't possess you? I.e. Can I
go in pursuit of getting a what's
something that one might want? A sports
car. And is it possible to then have the
sports car and pursue it without it
possessing me and therefore me avoiding
the consequences that come with that
unhealthy relationship to
possession. Cuz in your life there must
be things that you're pursuing and you
get those things. So your book sells a
million copies. your YouTube channel
does exceptionally well. You pursued
those things. Let's start with a sports
car. Okay. Um
it depends on the rest of the
circumstances. So, let me put it like
this. If the salary that you have, for
example, is just as much that you can
pay your rent. Nevertheless, you want to
have that sports car. Therefore, take a
loan, then buy the sports car. It's very
probable you're going to be very
attached to the car. Yeah. Simply
because out of the out of the situation
you bought it from. Yeah. You didn't buy
it from a from a position of abundance.
Yeah. So this is already not a good
starting point to afford something that
you actually cannot afford. So
differently it is
when you have the
possibilities and you just spend the
time and spend also the money on the
sports car and see it what it is and
realistically see it what how much time
you let's say spend with it. I do think
the excitement in the beginning is there
for a week, maybe a month, that's
already long, but it's fading. And at
some point, there will even be a day you
don't even see it cuz you're busy. Then
there will be a week when you see the
car once standing around somewhere. And
then there will be a months passing by
where you are traveling the world and
you're not even sure anymore when was it
the last time that you were riding it.
So, and these are things like when you
observe them and actually realize yeah
it's the truth. This is how the how the
development of things with possessions
is in the beginning it's always like you
want to have you want to have and then
they
fade.
go and diving into this type of
mentality of really
understanding wanting. Wanting is the
one part and then realizing how is life
really. Do you need it? Is it necessary?
Can you afford it is the second part. It
just opens another perspective and then
you just decide for
yourself. Yeah. But so whether something
is possessing you or you can possess
something without being attached to it
very much is linked to all of
this. From which position did you buy it
from? Did you attain it from? And then
the second thing is how much time do you
literally really spend with it? The
second of the five hindrances is ill
will. A negative emotion such as dislike
stops you from chasing a goal.
Can you give me some context on this
one? What do you mean by ill will?
Look, it's I make it super simple when
it comes to the five hindrances
literally is like
this. No, whatever whatever appears in
our
life. If I have my goal set right now
what you are not supposed to do is to
witness
something. And now if you have like the
number one sensual desire, sensory
desire, what we tend to do is we like
start to pull things towards
us. Okay, that's number one. The second
thing, what not to do, this is what it
all belongs to that family of
non-judgment is like when ill will
something appears in your life.
Something you witness. Yeah. You meet a
person you don't want to meet. You get a
message, you don't want to read that
message. whatever it is and you try to
avoid it by doing actions in order to
push it away from you. So what it
ultimately means is don't do any of them
because whatever you try to hold on to
the nature of thing is that this is
happening swinging away. is going to
move away from you and whatever you try
to avoid and push away from you is just
a question of time
until it's going to move like pretty
close towards you. It's going to come
towards you. It's going to come towards
you.
Okay? So that
means also in the way of how it's
expressed, don't touch the
water. If you don't want to
have a life that is too
shaky, don't touch the
water because in the moment you touch
your touch is the initiation for the
ripples to appear.
Same way you want to follow that goal.
You want to have it easy along that
goal. Don't touch any additional water
along your goal. Don't touch it because
you like something and don't touch it
because you dislike something because
when you walk towards the goal and you
do here and here and here, you you're
just going to ripple your whole
surroundings which ultimately means your
energy is being just drawn away from
your initial goal. That's how I would
say it is an ill will is one of these
expressions of you don't like something
and then you invest the energy there.
You like something and it draws your
energy back to there. And ill will is
similar in this category belonging to
this idea
of don't push, don't pull. as you've
become more popular and you've got
millions and millions of views across
the internet. Your TED talk, I think
from the link, one of the links that I
saw had some 20 million views and it
probably has tens of more millions of
views all over the internet. Um, there's
going to be more and more
people sending you messages, interacting
with you
and saying amazing things, saying not so
amazing things. We experienced this
obviously as a podcaster. you just you
get you receive all kinds of feedback
from everybody. When you think about how
you manage that and you manage other
people's opinion of you does this tie
into ill will and I guess the ultimate
question is do you care what people
think about you? So there was a time I
cared a lot a lot a lot a lot very much
but within the last five six years I
really had my hard lessons being
perfectly honest. Number one thing I
need to learn is also to
really not take things too deep into
consideration especially from people
that I've never met in my life. Number
one that is the first area I needed to
learn which means all the everything
that's on social media everything that
is publicly available. This is one thing
why because what they judge or if they
judge or what they comment they can only
comment on the character that is
actually being available to them. So
which is ultimately what which is for
example also let's say that
person yeah named Shuhungi on that cover
always like having a good uniform in a
way representing something
yes but I'm simply not limited to only
this type of
representation and this is something
really really important in general now
to to bring out there to the
world. It is
not it is not good. It is not
helpful if this idea of putting people
on on how you call it on on higher
pedestal or or podest is not a good
idea.
The idea of raising somebody up to be
our guru, raising somebody up to be our
master, raising somebody up, oh yes, he
is the he is the special one. All of
these
things are doing exactly the opposite of
what I'm trying to bring into the world
of what I do believe is the key
especially in this times right now
worldwide. It is to become aware of the
real and the
fake. This is the this is the current
situation that we're in that the
threshold that the line between whether
something is real or whether something
is artificial or not real. It's becoming
so
incredibly slim that
line. This is why at the moment our
world seems seems so
fractioned. There are the ones which are
completely about let's go into the
nature and then there's the other
fraction which is all about going into
the technology into everything that's
available nowadays where ultimately
meaning at some point you will be able
to just spend your whole life in your
living room cuz everything you want to
see and want to partially experience you
just call it into your living room. It's
going to be possible at some point in
time.
So why how do we get to the point? Yeah
exactly. Because of this, it's not good
if people raise you up and make you
unhuman. And this is what is being
attacked. So this is number one. That
takes a little bit the pressure off from
me to take it too seriously because I
just know they are seeing something but
it's a fraction of what I am. This
number
one second realization at the same time
was also not helpful or wasn't helpful
and or let's say was also a lesson for
me even the close people even the very
close people in my surrounding that
stayed with me for 8 n
years sometimes even such close people
don't know who you are can also happen
hurts double as much as people saying
something about you that don't know you.
Now you have people that you thought
know you and still they didn't get you.
Also very
painful. So ultimately leading only to
one thing. It only leads to one thing.
You would have right now the impression
of so what's the only way? Just go your
way regardless of what people think in a
way. Yes.
But have understanding for
them and and no ill will against them.
Have empathy for their lack of
understanding.
Yes, that is ultimately the only thing
that me as a as a result for the current
state of
being the that I took as my consequence.
Yes. So be careful, be very aware who
are you letting into your
circle and ultimately rely on yourself
and maintain
your sorry to say, but it's the
heart. Maintain the purity of your
intention. One of the things that I've
I've noticed in your work is that you
have this huge emphasis on being able to
focus oneself. And when I talked to you
about this brick, I think just before we
started recording, you said to me that
the average person on the street might
not be able to break it. But if someone
was really, really strong, they might be
able to break it. However, the key to
breaking this brick isn't strength
necessarily. It's the ability to really
really focus. And when we talked about
the five hindrances, they will sway us
from focus. They will distract us from
that ability to focus. So, you've
cultivated that ability to focus, which
culminates in you being able to smash
this brick with your hand. And it's not
necessarily a strength thing you're
saying. It is this connection between
mind and body focused at a particular
moment. Yes. So can you show me you
smashing this brick? Absolutely.
Do you do you put the the brick in the
in the middle of the blocks or do you
just put it there? Put it like this. Oh.
So okay. Okay. So chop it down on one
side. Okay.
Do you have another brick? Yes. There's
another one
here. You're going to pick your brick.
One is one is too easy.
[Applause]
hell.
[Applause]
[Laughter]
Damn. So, what were you doing then in
the in the leadup to that? Just have
your hands like here to the front.
If I touch you like this and only do
here. Yeah. M see this like I don't have
a good feeling for you. I don't have a
good feeling for your body. Yeah.
Because it's like it's superficial right
now. Mhm. What I do is like when I touch
you know so it's not this type of
touching you. When I touch you I
literally try to sense your body
structure. Yeah. I I feel like inside
you where is the tension? Where's the
relaxation inside the
body? So it's like we call it I'm
reading your
body. I'm reading your body. How is it
where is the energy locked? Where is it
dense? Where is it loose? So the same I
do with the
stone. But when I when I touch the
stone, I literally feel inside like
sounds funny, but I feel inside the
structure of the of the stone. I feel
the density of the stone in my
fingers and then I just see okay
[Music]
now. So I I I know how the energy is
going to come down. I know how the
energy is going to come down and then I
just like see how does it fit together.
So on the one side I feel the structure
of the stone. On the other side I know
what type of energy is going to come in.
Those two I combine and then I just boom
do it.
That's it. And how does that translate
to life generally?
Good question. Because we, you know
it's not a problem I have day-to-day
but that ability to understand the
energy of something and the structure of
something and then really understand be
able to cultivate your own focused
energy when you need it.
I do. So, do you need to have this
ability to live a proper life? I don't
think so. But somebody who is able to
break the stone like this definitely
possesses some type of skill set raises
the probability that you can do
something with that mindset in your
daily life. Which means already
um the only way to do this is you know
what consistency
means. You know what patience
means. Yeah. you also knows what like
endurance means or
like training means and all of these
character attributes that make it
possible to break the stone just also
builds the foundation I would say to
integrate this now into other areas of
life yeah so it's not about the breaking
of the stone but at the same time it's
also an expression of look the human
your body is capable of doing a lot of
things. Yeah. And this is just one of
them. There are so many extraordinary
abilities that people can do nowadays
but all of them have one thing in
common. You have a vision and you find a
proper way how to nourish that vision
that the vision becomes
real. Similar like this.
So this is a consequence of
yes a long journey of several character
traits and attributes which you've
cultivated over a long period of time
and this is just a a symptom or a
consequence of those things. You know
that's that's exactly the thing similar
like you know when yeah when nowadays
you look at any type of competition
sports the event itself the competition
is being recorded that one minute
performance.
Yeah. Or that nine rings or that three
three minutes. Yeah. Yeah. But
everything that makes it possible for
them to perform in that one minute on
that show. Nobody sees what is lying in
front of there. Similar like this. Yeah.
It's it's it's with less than one second
the stone is broken. Yeah. But took like
a few years to be able to do that one
second. And how long would it take me to
learn how to do two bricks like you just
did then? How long do you think you
would have to spend training me? You're
looking at my hand. M because it's
important because it's literally not
only about um it's not just about the
focus of the mind. It literally is also
about building the density now
physically speaking the density of the
bone structure. So I I can just give you
if you like a a little
example. What we do is this part and
this part of the arm we just smash it
like this. Oh my gosh. This is like a So
like this. Okay. Okay. You just try like
one just go really. Oh my
god. Your yours is like a steel.
Yeah. And and this is what it is.
Yeah. So it is changing you if you want.
You can like touch. You can feel it's
Yeah. It's like steel. Mine's like um
polyyrene in comparison to that. But
well, yours just feels like steel. It
felt like I was hitting a a a bar or
something. Okay. So, you've got to build
up the strength. But still, to answer
the question, I do
think 3 months, but dedicated training.
Yeah. Mhm. And what would that training
look like? So right now as I explained
before this is why I also like in the
book I mentioned one of the grandmasters
that I also learn a lot of the methods
from this is now let's say it's a stone
yeah stone belonging to the family of
earth because okay earth now in a in
Asian tradition we have like the five
elements or the five transition phases
wood earth metal fire water like these
five elements So the proper training
starts with the so-called wood training.
Okay. So we are using a lot of wooden
material to actually condition our body.
Yeah. So you're not going to break
stones. You you break like first of all
wooden things. Mhm. After wood is no
problem for you. Then we go to the next
layer which is going to be stone. You
know this was this was this one for
example. After stone comes metal. And so
like this you we we go through all the
layers until your body has increased in
its abilities. You know the frequency of
wood, you know the frequency of stone
you know the frequency and vibration of
metal. And this is how we increase our
ability to just uh be able to to to
actually maintain our strength in the
field of all five elements. You can
break metal
or you can hit metal. You can hit metal.
You can hit metal. Okay. You can hit
metal. Thank you. Fascinating. Thank
you. Thank you so much. Thank you.
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linkedin.com/doac and terms and
conditions apply. I was really thinking
a lot about these
um
virtues in Shaolon tradition. Virtues
are a guiding system in both martial
arts and daily life. The Shaolin warrior
practices thinking deliberately and
mindfully about the virtues of everyday
life for his or her life. And the there
are two categories of virtues. the
virtues to be expected and the virtues
to be
leared. What are these virtues that you
speak about in the Shaolon tradition?
Prior to somebody entering now let's say
into the temple and wants to learn from
there. First of all we also as teachers
want to find
out what does the character of that
personality already
possesses. Yeah. And these are for
example what we are looking for are
ultimately the virtues to be
expected. Virtues to be expected are for
example self-control. A certain amount
of
self-control, a certain amount of
discipline. So self-control, what does
that mean in this context? If I'm
self-controlled, what am I? You don't
let your emotions run over you. Okay?
You you you don't even if something
makes you angry but in this context it's
not honorable it's not respectful to now
shout out you shouldn't do it okay you
should like be able to maintain
your emotional states maintain your
temper let's say also at least to a
certain extent this is where I would say
it comes to self-control and the second
one you said was discipline so
discipline
meaning you have like I said even if
it's called the virtues to be expected
expected means they should be visible
somehow but not to the fullest extent to
to what's what people are capable of
okay discipline just meaning this
understanding that if you come to the
temple life you know it's going to be
difficult to wake up every day at the
same time and then start to do through
the go through the daily structure. So
it it needs some type of commitment.
Let's say it needs some type of I know
it's hard but I'm willing to do it. This
type of discipline. Yeah. This is also
in a in a way expected. And then uh
another one is simply to be benevolent
as well.
So that's kindness and compassion for
your brothers and sisters. Kind of it
goes. Yeah. The virtues sometimes swim
into each other. But this idea of why do
we have these virtues in the first
place and again it's like in Star
Wars the force what you're
learning the cultivation of
energy the skills that you are learning
they are these are very very powerful
things. Yeah. But what does what makes
the difference between somebody
possessing this power and using it for
the sake of humanity or somebody using
it for the um for the not betterment of
humanity. It's the
character. The power is the same. It's
the character. It's the carrier of the
power. It's the one who is in
in who's responsible to to hold this
power to maintain this power. That one
must be trained as well. And this is
where the virtues hit in. The virtues
are building the framework of the
character of the avatar ultimately that
is then receiving all different types
of training, skill training that we that
at least in the Shaolin tradition we
would say is good to know them. Same in
business really. I looked at a lot of
these virtues and I thought they're all
the kinds of things that we're looking
for in a good team member. So we've got
discipline self-control modesty
benevolence humility respect
righteousness trust loyalty
willpower perseverance persistence
courage and
patience. So ultimately, like I said
before, in the Shaolin traditional text
is broken down into 14 different
virtues. Yeah. Four of them to be
expected. Another five virtues of
action. Another five virtues of the
mind. Just simply when you will later on
fly through it again. The virtues of
action. What does it mean virtues of
action? It is how should you behave? How
should you
behave? Behave in a loyal
way. Behave in a trustful way. Behave in
a respectful
way. Behave in a courageous way. Yeah.
So this is the how should you do
something and the virtues of mind. For
example they
say what is it that nourishes the way
for you to put the virtues of action
into practice? How can you be? How can
you learn to behave respectfully?
Because naturally if people like
insulting you, you don't behave
respectfully towards
them. Yeah. So how can you still behave
respectfully, still be loyal to
people? How do you do it? Well, then
this is where where it then comes
to the virtues of the
mind to really learn to be
patient to really know what does it mean
to be
persistent to persevere during your
training. Yeah. And this is ultimately
how I would describe it to easily
understand. Do you believe in a god or
do you believe in a religion?
If if someone asked you which religion
do you follow what would your answer be?
I would call it the religion of
oneness. The religion of oneness. The
religion of I do believe that we are
connected at some
way and it is my journey. I don't want
to just intellectualize it.
I do think it is an it is a it the path
is to
lay out and remove all the friction and
all the obstacles to just realize that
it is like
this. Yeah, this is maybe also like an a
very essential point along along the
complete line whether somebody reads the
book or whether somebody watches all
these type of YouTube
channels. I myself always grew up in the
need to attain something to add
something up on top of my life.
This tradition, the whole tradition I'm
talking about is actually quite the
opposite. That's why in in the latest in
the latest videos or publications for
example, I often mention that actually
there is nothing I can give to anyone.
It's not that you miss something in your
life.
Yeah, remember you're not in a lack but
in the moment where it feels like we are
meeting and I give you something when
you even think that I'm giving you
something and you are about to receive
something that's not the right state of
mind already. I have nothing to give
you. The only thing that I really try to
do is take stuff away from you.
Take things away from you that are
covering that you see that you are
complete. What things tend to cover us
that need to be taken away? Everything
that builds up
identity. Everything that builds up a
stronger and stronger
identity. Everything that you keep from
the past in your mind.
The more that you keep the past in the
mind, the stronger your identity is. I
do think this is one correlation that
also goes hand in
hand. The more you keep past elements
inside your mind, the less likely you
will be able to break free into the
future and open up for the possibilities
that this lifetime might still have for
you.
Are you
happy? It's a difficult question.
I'm not searching for
happiness. I'm searching for peace.
So my state of what what I'm aiming for
I would say it is
peace because happiness for
me yeah taking by this word if there's
happiness there is sadness if something
can rise something must
fall if you can attain something there's
something to lose that's why it's
difficult that's why I I stopped the
moment I don't know what type of
happiness. You mean being satisfied with
where I am standing? Yes. Does it mean
that I don't have hard moments? I have
hard
moments. And that's why for me like what
is it I ultimately look for? I would
call it is just peace. Are you at peace?
More and more. Yes. More and more. This
one. Yes. More and more. What's in the
way of your peace?
I would call it karmic
relations karmic
connections that you just think
like you cannot avoid them. You you
cannot avoid them anymore. What is
karmic
connections? Karmic connection
meaning because your mother gave birth
to you
automatically whatever your mother is
doing or not doing however the state of
health of your mother is is going to
affect
you in a way. So there are sometimes
people in this world you have a closer
karmic relation towards them. So what
they are doing is also going to affect
you. So and in my case it's the
same. Yeah. So meaning so literally real
life speaking. So my son Yes. He is a
very strong karmic relation. He's on the
one side my own flesh and blood together
with my beloved. But it also means the
way how my son feels it is affecting me.
And this is something that I still need
to regulate. Learn to
regulate which also sometimes means I
mean if you only sleep like 2 hours per
night then it is like this
but you have good training to still
maintain your peace afterwards. But it
is these are simple things. Yes. And
what is your practice in terms of your
routines? What do you do every day that
brings you back to yourself so that you
can regulate yourself? What is your from
the moment you wake up in the morning
are there any routines that you try and
execute every day?
Number one
is one of the first things is really try
as often as you can to remind yourself
and put yourself in that proper state of
what you think you are.
I wake up and try to not already have
any type of thought from yesterday in my
mind. I try to wake up empty. Let's call
it like this. And meaning also try to at
all moments immerse myself as much as I
can in the present
moment. That's what it is. Yeah. Live in
the here and now. How you do this? To
live in the here and now. Stop jumping
into the past and stop jumping into the
future. Then you live in the here and
now. But you must practice
it. And literally meaning how you do it
make yourself empty. Because the only
thing that fills your mind with past and
future is your
thoughts. The mind.
So if I watched you for the first hour
when you woke up in the morning, what
would I see on a on a typical day?
I wake up and sit on the sofa and and
and still just
sit. So just being awake and and just
breathe literally just realizing slowly
scanning my own body from the inside
going through the
body. So really making sure in a way
that everything that's going to come up
during this day is being perceived very
consciously. Yeah. By this. So it's like
I slowly build up my energies prepared.
This is how I would call it. It doesn't
look very special looking from the
outside. Unless I wake up and I
mean the sun is asking for something
then of course I have my duties to do.
But if I can really have my day after
waking up still the next hour is still I
spend alone. This is what I prefer to
do. And do you do exercise in the
morning? Yes. What do you do? Push-ups
sit-ups and standing practice. What
standing practice? No. Partially it's
also some of them are like mentioned in
the book but literally it is what it
sounds like. I choose one position that
I'm standing in and then I hold that
position for 15 minutes.
Why?
So let's take all the spiritual part out
of this because there are some positions
that are looking
so
strange that at some point I also asked
myself how would somebody even invest
his
lifetime standing and putting yourself
through such a position. Well, there
must be a reason why in ancient
times it is kept as
a as a secret practice to stay like
this. And since I discovered it, I do
have to say that
um it's not this one. At some point, the
squatting monkey is
called this is a practice that builds up
what we call energy.
How do you build up energy? It is by
giving your mind something where you
need to have willpower to maintain
it.
Willpower and development of
energy go hand in hand with each other.
The will to
live, the will to keep going, the will
the
will, strong will, iron will, energy is
also very high. And so literally some of
these positions are so demanding on the
body that in order to maintain this
position, you you have to have will. You
need to create something about yourself
where you are pushing
yourself and this is uh when when we
have time I show you the exercise.
Yes. And this is why I do it.
So how important is that for everybody's
life to do hard things do you think?
Because it's very easy not to do hard
things in the comfort world we live in.
when I mention it and then you directly
look up in a way to me or any
professionals who then do this type of
training. Of course, it's it's it's it's
it's beyond any normal person's
abilities. But it's not about you need
to learn and do the hard stuff like
this. But one thing is for
sure. This
lifetime living a life as a human
definitely is not
easy. Let's put it like
this. Living this lifetime is not easy.
The more wishes you have, the more
difficult it becomes. The more ambitious
you are, the more the more you will have
to face. So bottom line
is I do think that in the moment where
you just on a regular
basis put yourself
consciously and
willingly in different situations and
circumstances that actually represent a
little bit the structures of
life. There are moments in this lifetime
where you are going to be super tense
super
tense. And then it's good to know
already how does it feel and what is it
that you can do well to learn and
release the tension. That's why
releasing tension is also a big part of
of the exercises. The one thing is
learning to release tension. The other
thing is like when you are too sloppy
when you're too slacky, how to increase
your tension, how to increase the energy
level again for you to get into back
into structure again.
So there's always this balance and
ultimately how does it help people to
know the hard stuff? Well, because I do
think that it is symbolizing this way of
life. It is symbolizing the patterns of
what you are going to go through in this
lifetime. And so you're almost training
to do hard things because hard things
are an inevitability of the life we
live.
in this training that I went through.
Yeah, for for the moment maybe take all
the spiritual part out. Simply the kung
fu training, the Shaolin kung fu
training. There is a saying which is
Shaolin kung fu literally means walking
through the valley of
pain. So what does it mean? When you are
doing stretching, stretching
stretching, stretching, it's going to be
painful. When you are doing strength
training is going to be painful. When
you do conditioning training, it's going
to be painful.
So the whole path on this martial art
journey, it is just filled with working
yourself up to the level of where it
feels
uncomfortable. Getting some consistency
into the practice until the point where
that uncomfortable feeling just started
disappearing. Why? Because somehow you
broke that initial comfort zone. So but
then it doesn't end. Now next
level until you're building up first of
all yeah whatever we're doing later on I
will show you some practices is not that
I do not feel pain I also feel pain
maybe I feel it
later but the essential part is that my
connection my relation between the pain
of the body towards what would it affect
in the way of how I take make decisions.
That is a different
one. I feel the pain but at the moment I
feel the pain but I see no necessity to
still change something about my way
right now. Why? Because I can take the
pain. Whereas when you are not used to
this pain, you feel it and then it tells
you let's say it's painful. The mind
okay is not good. And so you directly
change something. And this is and this
is just the difference. So it's not that
I became numb. No, I just feel there is
an additional layer that I can observe
about myself. It is
painful, but it's okay for right now.
And that's a a habit you've learned, I
guess, over time. That's a process
you've learned, which is you still have
the same stimulus, the same feeling, but
you tell yourself, you've learned to
tell yourself a different story about
that feeling or you've turned you
believe something differently about that
feeling. Many people would feel the pain
of I don't know starting a new career
journey, starting a business, whatever
might be painful and they would tell
themselves the story that that means
they are not good enough or they
shouldn't do it or that it's a threat
and they might stop. Whereas because
you've cultivated this new relationship
with pain, you're able to do these
things and tell yourself a better story.
I spent my
lifetime for for some part to really
wanting to build up my body and build up
the skills related to the field of
martial arts. So I want to build this
up. Other people want to build up their
business. I do think there is something
similar in the way of building up. When
I build up my body, how do I really
build up? How do I make my body grow?
It only works if I find
a continuous way of exposing my body to
situations outside of the comfort zone
of what I know. Elsewise, it wouldn't be
called growth. If I every day just do
something towards the body that the body
already knows how to do, there's nothing
growing.
So the idea of understanding where is
the comfort zone of my body then on a
regular basis very little must not be a
big jump but very little extending this
comfort zone until the body naturally
takes it as a habit in raising the bar
of where your comfort zone actually is.
Always a little bit. Always a little
bit. Always a little. But this only is
possible I think
by well what's called going over your
limits. But now comes the thing. You can
go over the limits by really
exaggerating and risking to be injured
or you make the idea of going going over
the limit
consciously aware carefully. still going
over the limit but in a in a still
controlled way. Let's say you know it's
the limit now but at the same time at
some point you also realize our bodies
our mind is so intelligent before the
when we are stretching at some point you
feel like everything's going to rip
apart but I know and this is why if we
would stretch even though you say ah it
hurts I know we can still go more yeah
you think but I just know yeah because
your body is so intelligent that before
something serious really happens, he
tells you way before that that be
careful. And this figuring out where
where is really this limit. This is that
this is what makes the difference. There
is a limit. Yes. But but this limit
still has
a has like a range of where we can still
move inside. Yes. And I do think that
this as a general line applies to
everything if you want to grow and step
by step by doing
so the comfort
zone
extends. So how is something new
supposed to enter into your life? Well
there's only one way exactly the way
that many people are also afraid of
right
now. Go into the unknown.
But that's exactly what it is. If this
table is our comfort zone and you just
stay on here, you will never know how
beautiful London streets are. If you
just stay here, you need to go into the
unknown. You need to slowly walk your
find your way out here.
But that means
that going into the uncertainty is
nothing
bad for me. I'm really really happy
uncertainty is existing in this world
cuz I cannot imagine how boring it would
be if I would already know with
certainty where I'm going to be in 20
years.
Is there something practical one can do
to get better at stepping outside of
their comfort zone? Because in our or
everyday lives, stepping outside of our
comfort zone might just mean putting our
hand up in a meeting or doing a public
talk or starting a Instagram page for
our cupcakes or it could be small
things. It could be learning how to run.
What's the first sort of small step one
should take to develop that habit of
being okay in the uncertainty of our
growth zone? Some people
say just start
reading. I do think that people who do
like reading this is something meaning
always look for something new to
learn. Always realize that the the
things able to still be discovered is
way bigger than what you think you know.
And that means exactly the way of how
you also describe it now. Exactly. The
last 20 times you stayed quiet the next
time you raise your
hand. Whatever it is, just don't stay in
the old patterns. Break the cycle.
This is where where I would say a great
potential lies in
the thing that holds us back is fear.
Yes. How how do we overcome that fear?
So am I fearless?
No. Do I fear a lot of things? No.
I do think there's only one thing that
ultimately makes you break free from
fear which
is to find a
way and wake up from the
dream. You don't take things too
seriously in this lifetime.
to just change. Let's put like this
change your
perspective rationalize things if you
like it's similar like fear and worry.
Yes.
Oh, at least when I look at my worries I
had in the last months.
Well, for sure 80% 90% of all the
worries just didn't happen in the first
place. 10% might somehow came true. But
then again, I asked myself, good. So the
10% that came true, even though I had
the worries, what could I do about it?
Coming to the
conclusion
nothing.
Nothing, you know. And then something
just really started to to shift inside
of me where I
literally let go of
something. Let go of this
idea that that everything is
like is like onedirectional. That
everything that you're going to
encounter in this lifetime is going to
be beautiful. Everything in this
lifetime is going to be peaceful.
everybody you're going to meet along
your journey is going to be wellhearted
towards you. No, it's
not. Because in the moment where you
have well-hearted people, you have
illwilled people. And in the moment
where there is success, where you want
to be part of the success story, you're
going to be part of the failing story.
And in the moment where you want to be
part of the light story, you're going to
be part of the dark story.
This is how it
is. This is the world of what we call
it's the world of yin and yang. This is
the world of birth and
death of
aging and sickness.
And this and this is why in the in the
ancient traditions more and more even
nowadays why why in the first place
there is this whole idea about
liberating yourself breaking free and
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feet. We were talking about the five
hindrances and the first of those was
the sensual desires which we talked
about and the second was ill will. The
third is dullness, lack of motivation to
move forward in life and the fourth is
restlessness, unable to focus on the
present moment and the fifth is
skeptical doubt, indecisiveness and not
trusting yourself. And to overcome the
five
hindrances, you recommend the four-step
rain method. What is the four-step rain
method? Yes, I do think it's called rain
method. That has also been taught to me
because it's easy to remember. What is
it that you're supposed to do? Like I
said, in this context of putting it
simple, you have set yourself a goal.
There are five mental states that could
make it difficult for you to reach that
goal. Those five mental states are these
five hindrances. Yes. Could you read
those out for me again? So sensory
desire, sensual desire here, ill will
dullness, sloth topper or restlessness
and then ultimately uh indecisiveness or
self-doubt. Okay.
Now what does the rain method tell you?
Number one, it tells you with the R
recognize. Recognize or
realize. So along your journey, every
day just sitting somewhere
contemplating, learn to realize in which
mental state are you actually finding
yourself right now. This is just the
recognition, the realization of where
you
are. The A stands for acknowledge or
acceptance.
So even you know the second one was
called ill will or actually it's called
aversion. So denying something pushing
something away from you very important
right now same here you recognize
something inside of you about you of
course second one accepting it
acknowledging it is
important. Yes. I meaning now
investigation.
investigation meaning okay I see I
am I see I'm dull I see I'm like like or
I see I'm
restless okay I accept that I have this
feeling right now investigation meaning
okay what is it like how did I get into
this state have I been there this
morning already in that state of being
no this morning I really felt
So what happened now since the morning
until now that put me in this state of
restlessness to who did I talk to? Was
it a message that I received? What is it
ultimately that led to this feeling of
restlessness? So really
investigating like like a detector
investigating.
So and ultimately then the n difficult
one but it is standing for
nonidentification.
So, and nonidentification
meaning I mentioned it
before even if you just use it as a
picture right now as a concept if you
want
but try not to identify your being too
much with your body and too much with
the mind. And if you don't identify with
the body and not identify yourself too
much with the mind also you do not
identify yourself too much with all the
things that you investigated that you
felt like were nourishing your
restlessness.
If you had one last message to
share and that message
was a message you had to share for your
son because one day the inevitability of
life means that you do have to have one
last conversation and we don't always
get to choose what that one last
conversation is but if you do get to
choose that last conversation with your
3mony yearear-old son once he's able to
process it a little bit better say he
was 18 years old what would that message
Okay. Concepts are concepts. Theories
are theories. Be careful or be aware of
what you are keeping or what are you
nourishing in the
mind. Never restrict yourself to any
concept. Never restrict yourself to any
identity. Never restrict yourself to any
type of role.
What you
create you
create and you can create quite a lot of
things.
Yeah. Something along these lines
probably. I read that when you lost your
father that had quite a profound impact
on your life and
your I guess your way of understanding
the world. Your father passed away from
cancer when you were sort of roughly 28
years old. It was roughly around
2012. And this I read gave you a deeper
sense of
purpose. H how how did that impact you
as a man?
Yeah. See just imagine
like when I talked before about enduring
things going through my childhood
and always receiving let's say to to
never be enough but still I mean still I
had this internal fire going to still
always give my best but for the sake of
my
parents and so yeah from the age of four
elementary school give your best high
school give your best studying give your
best study again okay I do again so all
the time not because I necessarily
wanted all of this it's because for the
sake of my parents for the sake of they
are the ones who allowed me in the first
place to in a way be alive yeah also
thanks to them so this was in a way um
my expression of what they say as long
as they are alive I listen to them so
and then you know walking all the way up
to this this academic education then
finally graduating like
after 20
years. Yeah. And then I just returned
from the graduation back to back to
Kaiser Slot and the city where I lived
and that was the last year uh I spent
with my father. Yeah.
So literally meaning
uh spending so many years in this
academic education for my
father and now he's not even there to
witness that it has been done for him.
Now, this was like a a point where I
thought
like
yeah, this was the one area that uh that
stuck somehow a little bit hard. And
then the next things yeah I call it
maybe small but it's not so small
apparently because um I grew up in let's
say this Asian tradition with let's say
different type of beliefs or rituals or
ceremonies that we do. One of these
things was that when my father was still
uh lying in hospital and it was clear
that it's just going to take a few days
until he would pass away.
He for example also said well he only
said it to me because you know I I would
be the only one who is able to do it.
Don't cry for
me because he couldn't say to my mother
she cannot handle it.
couldn't say to my
brother. Yeah. But
because I trust in the I trust in
the in the tradition the reason why not
to cry when my father pass away. Yes.
Because we do think the body is there.
The body passes away. The spirit sets
itself free. And when the spirit simply
realize that all the sons are there, the
family is there crying. The spirit in a
way is still bound to this realm, bound
to the earth's realm, let's say. And in
order to be able to help my father
actually to get on
a to move on quicker, to move on
quicker, that was the reason why it is
sometimes so important to don't show any
grief in the moment when a beloved one
like passes
away. Yeah. But all of these things.
Yeah. No
like spending so many years for my
father, then he's not there to realize
it, then not being able to cry, and
then being in all this very very hard
field and always
like overachieving
and no problem working 16 hours a day.
Well, these are all the things that made
it possible to be where I am right
now. But at the same time, I just do
feel like especially in the moment now
when when my son started to come and all
of these things, um I just felt like
there's a lot blocked
there or there's a lot that still needs
to be released for the sake of my son.
And yeah
what is it you needed and when did you
need it? I would call it
recognition. Being recognized by my
father at some
point to finally somehow say you you did
well is
enough. But it didn't come until today.
So I still keep
going. I never heard it from my
father. From my mother I also don't hear
it. Well maybe in a different way but I
do
think it is the father's
recognition that you probably aim for.
So these are absolutely things that do
shape my character for sure.
Many people will be able to relate in
their own ways and maybe their parents
have now passed on or are no longer with
us. So I'm wondering if there is a way
to hear it from
yourself. Yes, there
is. There
is. And again, this leads to the fact of
sometimes it's very very helpful to
really shut the world, shut the world
out of you and spend time with
yourself and actually create what you
think you were missing there. Create it
cuz you're the one who creates it.
That's exactly what I do
think
that when you we were speaking about it
right now of course we could say that
what is it that I was looking for from
my father fact is is not I'm not going
to hear it from him anymore so I need to
hear it of course by
myself and this is where it comes to all
these type of practices and methods that
many specialists now they also like
emphasizing regardless of how you call
them.
Yeah. And what are those sentences in
particular that if
I if I was your
father you would want me to say to you
right
now? Well, something
like you did well. You did
enough. I see what you are
doing. But now take your energy back.
and give it to your
son. Give him everything that you feel
you didn't receive from
me. And if you heard those words from
him, how do you think he would change?
I do think there will be
change and I do think there is already
change. Yeah. And this is maybe like the
part where like specialists now they
would say it's not necessarily an area
of the conscious mind. I do think that
these are talks right now more dealing
with
subconsciously is stored inside our our
let's say in our mind. I think this is
where it plays a role. No especially
when it's about patterns that come up.
It's not consciously when you're
conscious enough you can regulate
already a lot. It's the subconscious
things that you are not aware of that
are still a part of your life. And if
you wouldn't have cuh asked about my
father, I wouldn't even think about him
for one month is all not a problem.
Yeah. But I do still think that these
are like very very deep layers that just
translate a
lot unconsciously into the way of of
doing things in way of how I see things
also and this is where I feel like it
probably would help. Have you grieved
his passing?
Yes.
Yes. I do think at at some extent when
the when the 49 days that's the period
of where it's normally said don't grief
at that time 49
days afterwards I did
yes but probably there's
still a lot more to
release. you've written this wonderful
book which describes the way to
selfmastery and it's um it's a really
transformative book that I highly
recommend everybody checks out. I'm
going to link it below. When we talk
about
selfmastery, what is it you mean? What
is it to master
oneself? So, growing up like I said in
this field of martial arts, I met a lot
of masters. I lot met a lot of
grandmasters. I always went looking for
other instructors, looking for somebody
outside of myself to be a mentor, to be
a guide for
me. But at some point, always
realizing that everybody, no matter who
it was, they possessed some type of
skill that I wanted to learn from them.
But there was one thing that in a
way none of them in a way could help me
with and that
was how do I run my my own life. I can
learn skills from you. I can learn
skills from here. I can improve in this
area in this area. But putting all these
skills, putting all these knowledge
putting all the advice, putting it into
a structure, into a frame, and then to
run my own life with it. There's only
one person who can do
this
yourself. So, and this is where I meant
that don't rely on a master for him to
run your life. Don't rely on a mentor, a
guide, whatever to run your
life. This whole journey is about you
learn and acquire the skills and acquire
the knowledge and acquire whatever you
think is
necessary to bring out the best version.
Let's call it like this. the best
version, the best
refined potential about about yourself
about what you believe you are capable
of bringing out about
yourself. Meaning the master is already
sitting inside of each
individual. It's just that we don't
nourish that master inside of us enough.
And who in particular at this moment in
time do you believe would benefit most
from the message inside the covers of
this book?
The more you feel like that your
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um that that your well-being about
yourself is being dependent on any third
parties anything outsourced. So if the
government you feel like if any decision
from the government affects you, read
the book. If like your colleagues at
work affect you by what they say and
what they
think, that's also something. Every time
when you have the feeling your
well-being is dependent on something
that you feel you have no influence
in because this is exactly this is the
antidote. This book is literally telling
you don't outsource your well-being to
anything that you
cannot influence or
control. Which literally
means place the
emphasis and the foundation of your
well-being only on things that you have
influence on. And which one is that?
your body and your mind. Of all the
things we've discussed today, is there
anything anything at all that you
think is the most important thing that
we missed for the for the person that's
sat there at home and I'll give you a
persona of the person. They are they're
feeling a little bit lost in their life.
They're feeling like they could do more.
They're maybe lacking in purpose and
meaning in their life a little bit. um
they're struggling in various areas with
their relationships, maybe a little bit
with work, and they're feeling the the
normal pressures of life that we all we
all feel. Is there anything for that
person that's listening now and that's
gotten this far in the conversation that
you might say in their ear right now?
It's sometimes really nice to see the
why I
to see the full
picture. The full picture of me is I
didn't start like being on the cover of
the book. I didn't start like having all
the abilities and skills that I have
nowadays. I didn't start with all the
social media channels as they are right
now. I started actually in the poorest
area of that city in Kaiser Slouten that
until today is known to be like the area
where people do not like to go. This is
where I come out
from. So was my life always easy? Well
I don't think so.
But there are just a few fundamental
things
that meanwhile after like 40 years
meeting people, talking with people
looking into the world, being able to
actually see some type of structures in
the world, I do believe that what you
might call successful people or people
that somehow made it in whatever way you
think is made it, I do think they have
something in common there is something
in common amongst them. Okay. So and one
thing that I would definitely say
is to really be able to
endure is one
area really having that persistence even
so okay today is not working everything
goes wrong. Yeah.
like not like cutting it off like
suddenly but this type of persistence
and consistency like just knowing and
trusting. Okay, let's do it
again. So literally trial and
error, hard times, good
times to just understand that this life
is like this up and down. There is a up
and down. The one the success doesn't
come without the failure. The brightness
right now that is being seen from
people. Yeah. But there's another side
that that built the foundation for
people nowadays to to
shine. Yeah. And just to understand a
lot of things is possible but it's never
onedirectional. Yeah.
And now to put things really literally
into practice, one of the easiest
things, how do I know what should be the
next? What should I do tomorrow? What
should I do tomorrow?
Okay, look at yourself and ask yourself
what is the most disturbing whatever it
is from the last week in your
life. What is disturbing you about your
life the most from the last week?
You can even extend it to what is it
which emotional state is it that
followed you primarily in the last one
month.
So and then maybe investigating again
okay what is it that brings up that
emotion that state inside of you? What
is is it somebody who triggers it? Is it
something that triggers it? So really
boil it down to the point that you
actually
see this is what blocks me right now in
my life. This is literally what blocks
me in my life. I want to move into the
future, but this here it follows me. It
blocks me. It takes my energy. It's this
one. I can literally see it. No, that is
the one. Now invest all of the energy to
figure out the solution for this
one. Because if you took care of this
already the last half year, the chances
are very very high. You're going to have
it the next half year, which means
you're going to have it already for one
year. And if you do nothing about it
it's going to be two years. And it's
going to be three years. And in three
years, you still sit there and complain
that you were not able to move on. Yes.
because it's the same pattern and it is
the same
hindrance still in the life and this is
for example how I know what is my next
area of
um of
development the one that let's say
shakes me the most at the moment if I
think about literally I think about is
it something in the business area that
shakes me no is it something in the
family area that shakes me No, is it
something in the in the relationship
area that and like this you find out
okay that is the next one let's tackle
it and and so and we will always find
something that in a way like we would
say we could
optimize and I do believe that in the
moment where you say
no I have
arrived I think then there's really
nothing to be
done then just to be Sweet.
We have a closing tradition on this
podcast where the last guest leaves a
question for the next guest, not knowing
who they're going to be leaving the
question
for. And the question that has been left
for you is
uh, what is your greatest regret?
I would say that 40 years
long, whatever I said and whatever
decision I took in the last 40
years, I could always stand behind
it. Yeah. I I pushed decisions through
and I gave I gave commence to to do it
the way that I wanted
because behind it my mind was always
supporting all of
this. Just in the recent months I had to
take a
decision. I would have wished to have a
little bit more time to make it to make
the transition more pleasant but I
couldn't. I had no choice.
And so despite of not feeling that it is
the right way to do it, I still had to
do it. And this is what I regret. It's
like firing someone, letting someone go
kind of like this. Yes.
Thank you. Thank you so much for the
message you're putting out into the
world because it's a increasingly
necessary message because we're I think
we're all searching for answers and for
a variety of different reasons. Um, and
your message as I read it throughout the
book, the the striking thing about it is
it's a simple one, but that doesn't mean
it's an easy one, but it's a very, very
necessary one. And for anyone that does
relate to the things we've described to
today and the situations we've described
that people are feeling at the moment
I'd highly recommend you give this book
a try. Um, because it is a completely
different message. So, thank you for
writing such an incredible book and
thank you for the wisdom that you've put
out into the world. I highly recommend
everybody goes and checks out your
YouTube channel um because there's much
more content there and you're you're a
real star on YouTube. Your TED talk is a
smash hit sensation that has changed
millions of people's lives as well. So
thank you again for your time today.
It's been a huge honor. Thank you
Stephen, for the invitation. Appreciate
it having this conversation. Thank you
so much.
I'm going to let you into a little bit
of a secret. You're probably going to
think me and my team are a little bit
weird, but I can still remember to this
day when Jamaima from my team posted on
Slack that she'd changed the scent in
this studio. And right after she posted
it, the entire office clapped in our
Slack channel. And this might sound
crazy, but at the Diary of SEO, this is
the type of 1% improvement we make on
our show. And that is why the show is
the way it is. By understanding the
power of compounding 1%s, you can
absolutely change your outcomes in your
life. It isn't about drastic
transformations or quick wins. It's
about the small consistent actions that
have a lasting change in your outcomes.
So two years ago we started the process
of creating this beautiful diary and
it's truly beautiful. Inside there's
lots of pictures, lots of inspiration
and motivation as well, some interactive
elements and the purpose of this diary
is to help you identify, stay focused
on, develop consistency with the 1%s
that will ultimately change your life.
So, if you want one for yourself or for
a friend or for a colleague or for your
team, then head to the diary.com right
now. I'll link it below. This has always
blown my mind a little bit. 53% of you
that listen to this show regularly
haven't yet subscribed to the show. So
could I ask you for a favor? If you like
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and you want to support us, the free
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We'll listen to your feedback. We'll
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to and we'll continue to do what we do.
Thank you so much.
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