The fastest way to become miserable

how to be miserable for the rest of your life step one is to focus on what's not going well whether it's in your business in your relationships in your health if you keep focusing on oh my God we didn't

get enough sales dis quarter I had a fight with this person the moment you bring the focus to a negative you immediately feel miserable and if you do the opposite you focus on what's going well like we made so much progress on

this other aspect of the business oh my relationship with my family is actually really healthy right now if you can look on the positive side you will feel better but what do people do most of the

time they focus on problems that need to be solved a lot of the problems that people come at you with is a non problem the real problems are your like critical health problems your family problems

your financial sustenance that genuinely impact the livelihood of your day-to-day life the rest you're choosing to magnify that situation by bringing your focus to it and every time you do you become that

much more miserable next is to focus on other people's progress instead of your own now this is so easy in today's world where we have so much Social Media

Blasting images of perfect influencers doing perfect [ __ ] it's so difficult to leave the apps as well and then you see one image of this person who's got Perfect Skin perfect body in a luxurious

Hotel spending time having the best food with their best boyfriend or girlfriend or whatever and you're just there like what the hell why the hell does this guy have so much money why the hell does this guy have so much access to all these hotels why does this girl get to

do all this kind of stuff and I don't what happens in that moment you're like oh that's cool and then eventually if you can manage to take yourself away from the phone you feel [ __ ] you feel miserable because you compared yourself

to other people the best thing you can do is compare yourself to yourself of yesterday and this is how you actually build momentum and progress in your life in the gym in your diet in your weight

loss in your Jiu-Jitsu if you're just like okay I'm out of plateau right now but I feel like I got a little bit better at this move this is the way to feel good and before you know it you

overtake most people so make sure to focus on your own progress rather than other people's next you get pushed around and you don't stand up for yourself this is one of the biggest things that I had to develop as I was

growing up cuz I always was somewhat of a nice guy I wanted to avoid conflicts I wanted people to get along if you cannot set boundaries you will be pushed around and you will live the life that other people want you to live your parents are

like oh can you do this for me and this and this and this and you just keep doing it and suddenly you find yourself you're like wait what what about all the stuff that I wanted to do then you start to feel [ __ ] about the fact that you couldn't say no if you don't want to be

miserable setep better boundaries next is to blame other people constantly this is the kind of person you want to avoid whenever they have a problem their first instinct is to blame other people they

don't look back on their own actions and think wait I might have been a douchebag and instead constantly deflect blame to other people the job the societal

structure or men or women or you know certain r races they're constantly saying it's not me it's them now why does this actually make you miserable even if you are right that it was their

fault you are taking control away from your life because that has to change for you to have a good time this is not good you're not going to change them they they ain't going to change the system's not going to change you're just binding

yourself to being miserable and you don't want to do this you want to instead do the more difficult thing to be like okay I take responsibility for this it's my fault even if it's not my fault it's my responsibility and I'm

going to do something to change it instead of Shifting blame take responsibility next when you're just in a cycle of processed food and shitty behaviors drinking smoking and all this

kind of stuff watching porn and Netflix and just you're in that Loop and you're like why is it so difficult to exercise why is it so difficult to eat healthy you're just stuck you do that enough

times it starts to stack up you get Li fat you get obese you can't even get it up you look [ __ ] in clothes you develop face fat what the hell is going on everything goes down the hill I'd be

spending periods like this and then I would have like a summer holiday where from Europe I would come to Korea and I'd be spending time with my family I wouldn't be smoking I wouldn't be like

doing all this like bad food stuff naturally with family you just eat really healthy we were doing healthy stuff like going to see exhibitions and going on Hikes and traveling like just

doing really wholesome healthy stuff and then you start to feel better like you sleep better your mind is fresher and you only realize about this other state that you could reach when you're out of

that next is to think that you can't change so many people believe that their identity their body the way they are their personality is fixed it's not

fixed it's only fixed by the things that are keeping it fixed which is your own beliefs the people around you that's what's keeping you fixed where you are if you cut the chain if you're like okay

I don't care what my high school friends and University professors and my family expect of me or think that I am I don't care what Society wants me to be at a certain age if you can start to cut

those ties and be like I can be something different if I want to and then actually take steps towards it you'll surprise yourself at how much you can change now the clearest example of this that you can experience for

yourself is changing your body because you can literally go work out and see the change in your body in the mirror this is why working out in the gym is super duper powerful you can change but

the first thing is you got to believe and want the change next if you spend time with people that focus on what's not going well that that blame other people constantly that are getting

pushed around and then not good at setting boundaries what's going to happen you're going to think like them you're going to move like them you're going to talk like them you need to understand that if you're in one of those the best way to not become miserable is to get out of it the best

way to stay miserable is to be around people like that I hope all those tips point you in the opposite direction and I'll see you next week