What Being a Personal Trainer Taught Me About Women

I'll tell y'all, being a personal trainer at these luxury gyms, Equinox, Boston Sports Clubs in Welsley, Massachusetts. Look up Welsie,

Massachusetts. Look up Welsie, Massachusetts. Like I I would say it's

Massachusetts. Like I I would say it's top two, top three, like wealthiest place, wealthiest city in Boston. Like

when I was a trainer at these places, especially when I was in college, because that was my first ever quoteunquote occupation that I did, especially while I was in college, there were a lot of interactions that I would have with women, married women

specifically, not single women. I did

have some single women that I worked with. That's fine. But married women, I

with. That's fine. But married women, I would have some interactions with them that would leave me scratching my head because, you know, I'm a very moral person and obviously don't [ __ ] where you eat, right? Like always, that was

always my mindset. Never [ __ ] where you eat. And and also never touch another

eat. And and also never touch another man's wife, right? That's another thing.

Consensually, of course. I know some people are going to think like I'm saying something crazy, but I would have these crazy experiences where, you know, obviously I'm a trainer. I'm here to

make money. I'm making money and I'm

make money. I'm making money and I'm working with these women and they start to get really flirtatious, right? And

you start to wonder because you know that they got you know that they're married because they came with their husbands in that consultation. Their

husbands were sitting in that consultation. their husbands were egging

consultation. their husbands were egging them on to actually be trained by me and they were all for it. And then once the husband left and and they were just me and them in the gym, right? They would

start to, you know, say flirtatious things. They say, "Oh, you're so

things. They say, "Oh, you're so attractive." Like, "Oh, your muscles. I

attractive." Like, "Oh, your muscles. I

love how you look. Like, oh my god, like you're you're so you're so amazing. I

wish my husband was like that." And they would start to say things like this in the beginning, right? And I would work with these women for about 3 to six months, right? Nothing crazy. But as the

months, right? Nothing crazy. But as the weeks went on, the flirtation the the the flirtations got more and more and more and more and more, right? To the

point where it just got to a point I'm like, you're m like I wouldn't tell him this, but in my head I'm like, you're married. Like, how could you how could

married. Like, how could you how could you be this flirtatious? Like, how could you be egging me on so much? And it

would get to a point, I would say typically around week eight, they would be like, "Hey, I'm not going to lie, like I I'm really attracted to you. like

I don't really do much when I'm at home.

My husband's not there. He's always at work. I you can come over or something

work. I you can come over or something like that or like hey, let's go do this.

Let's go do that. And I would politely say no. I respectfully say no because

say no. I respectfully say no because obviously, you know, I respect their husbands. I respect what they're doing.

husbands. I respect what they're doing.

I respect the hustle that they're doing.

But there's one thing I realized because these demographic of women were rich women, right? And these rich women were

women, right? And these rich women were always left at home by themselves. They

were always bored. So they always wanted to talk to a lot of these guys who were in these services industries, right?

They would have their own personal masseuse who was a male. They would have their own trainer who was a male. They'd

have their own gardener who was a male.

They'd have all these male services around them, right? Clearly for a reason. It it never was just that,

reason. It it never was just that, right? It never was just for just like

right? It never was just for just like their their actual trade work that they did. But as I was talking to them more,

did. But as I was talking to them more, I would try to understand what was going on at home because that would give me a good understanding of why they act the way that they act because I do believe

that women who who feel neglected or or who feel like they're just sitting at home and just like their husband is out doing whatever he's doing. Again,

respectful because he's going out, he's going on business trips. Who knows what he's doing on these business trips, of course, but like he's bringing in money, right? She's living this comfortable

right? She's living this comfortable lifestyle. Why would you talk to a

lifestyle. Why would you talk to a 19-year-old personal trainer who's in college still? Like, why would you do that? You know what I mean? So,

it always hit me in the back of my head like, what's going on? Like, why are you choosing to talk to me versus the guy who's rich? Don't women like rich guys?

who's rich? Don't women like rich guys?

Don't they only want money? And when I started to really analyze this, I noticed that the money was kind of like a safety net for them. They want the rich guys because the rich guys have the

money that will give them the lifestyle that they want. But the fun comes in with the guy who may not be rich but also has a certain personality and has a certain edge to them that they're super

attracted to. More of like the high

attracted to. More of like the high testosterone guy, right? That like they they just have like this crazy fondness of they fantasize over. A lot of women fantasize over the personal trainer.

They fantasize over the the masseuse that touches them a little bit in a certain way and they get excited and they want to do this and they want to do that. I'm not saying all women, but that

that. I'm not saying all women, but that happens consistently. And it got to a

happens consistently. And it got to a certain point where I was really just asking so many questions about their their relationships and they would open up. They would say a lot. They say, "Oh,

up. They would say a lot. They say, "Oh, well, you know, he doesn't he doesn't last very long. Like, it's it's kind of boring. Like, I've never orgasmed in my

boring. Like, I've never orgasmed in my in in my sex life at all like they would they would just like throw this [ __ ] out there and they would bash the guy so much and in my head I'm like but he's a

millionaire like bro when I tell you Wsie Massachusetts millionaire billionaires out there right there are I remember um when I was waiting tables

cuz I did a little bit of serving at the country club the Welsie Country Club the CEO of Bank of America was there I'll never forget that I didn't even know who he was I served him right and these are the types of guys that live there like

all the NBA players live there everything, right? And all of their

everything, right? And all of their wives, I'm not saying his wife or I'm not saying any NBA player's wife, but like a lot of these rich guys wives would go to these trainers and they would flirt with them and they would do

things with them. And it always puzzled me cuz I'm like, you have something safe at home. Why are you why are you coming

at home. Why are you why are you coming here and taking the risk with somebody?

What if what if he finds out? Right? But

then obviously, you know, they they have probably half of whatever the guy has and they feel like they can do whatever they want. And it was just crazy to

they want. And it was just crazy to experience this stuff. And they would always talk about how like he didn't he doesn't necessarily listen to me. He

doesn't pay pay enough attention to me.

I always feel like I'm alone. I'm with

the kids. Like I I I just like want to have some fun, right? And it it's tough to hear this as a man because you're like, man, what if this [ __ ] happens to me? Which again, it can happen to

me? Which again, it can happen to anybody. It can happen to me. It can

anybody. It can happen to me. It can

happen to you. It can happen to anybody.

It doesn't [ __ ] matter. The reality

is it's it is a possibility, right? But what I've also noticed is

right? But what I've also noticed is it's a possibility that can be reduced if you're a man who can basically do more. Right? And again, this is going to

more. Right? And again, this is going to piss off a lot of guys. They're like,

"Why do I have to do more? I just don't want to date women at all." Go ahead.

Don't don't do that. Right? That's your

that's your prerogative. But I take that as a masculine man. I take that as a challenge. like like how can I be

challenge. like like how can I be somebody who's also fun, cool to talk to, like can actually give the woman a good experience while also getting the money as well, right? It's good to have

both, but a lot of these guys would be so focused on their careers, which again, respectful respect to them because that's super important. But the

women would be on the side just [ __ ] around, right? Idol's mind is the

around, right? Idol's mind is the devil's playground is what I learned because as they're doing these exercises, they're pointing their butt out a certain way. They they want to do more squats all of a sudden. They want

you to get right behind them. They want

you to do all these different things.

And I just knew I just realized, man, I'm like, if you're a dude and and you let your and you let your woman like go go be with like a a male trainer or like

a male um masseuse or any of these different services, you're kind of cooked at the end of the day. Especially

if you're a grinder. If you're somebody who's really working hard and building and you're not at home very often, the likelihood of something happening is a lot higher. And I didn't realize this

lot higher. And I didn't realize this until I went through that process. And

once I started to understand like it's not about the money, it's not it's about the fun, it's about the thrill, it's about the emotional roller coaster. A lot of these guys when

roller coaster. A lot of these guys when I would meet them, when I would when they would come and sit down at like, you know, we would do halfway point reviews and stuff like that and like they'd want to renew and everything, they would be so excited that I'm

working with them. They're like, "Man, you're doing so great. You look so amazing, etc., etc., right?" And it's like they they just didn't understand what was going on behind the scenes. It

like could not even be possible in their mind that their their wife would be flirting with a 19-year-old personal trainer. Like, what? like, "I have the

trainer. Like, what? like, "I have the money. Of course, she's attracted to

money. Of course, she's attracted to me." It's like, "No, no, no, no." And by

me." It's like, "No, no, no, no." And by the way, a lot of these guys were fat. A

lot of these guys were fat, out of shape. I was like, "Man, I'll train both

shape. I was like, "Man, I'll train both of you guys." I jokingly say this in the consultations. I'll be like, "I can

consultations. I'll be like, "I can train both of you guys. Actually, that'd

be dope." And of course, the woman would be like, "No, no, no. It's just for me.

It's just for me. It's just for me." And

the guy would be like, "Yeah, yeah, she can have that. I'm I'm good." Now,

what's crazy is the woman would want to get in better shape. The man would not.

As she got in better shape, she would start to look in different directions, right? I would see the same woman

right? I would see the same woman looking at other trainers as well, not just me. I'm not saying that I'm like

just me. I'm not saying that I'm like this Kasanova or nothing like that. It

was just the idea of being with somebody who was in shape, somebody who was young, somebody who looked adventurous, somebody who looked like they were just living life just on the edge. Like that

that's what they were looking for, you know? And so it got to a certain point

know? And so it got to a certain point where I just realized it's it's not it's not all that it seems to be. Like

chasing money is great. Great to be able to chase a a fulfilled life when it comes to like your finances to make sure that you're not stressed all the time.

But it gets to a certain point where all of your life as a man has to be balanced, right? And it's like you can

balanced, right? And it's like you can have the greatest woman in the world, but if you neglect her completely, she's going to go arai. She's going to start doing other [ __ ] because they need

attention. All of them do. It's it's

attention. All of them do. It's it's

normal for them to want attention. But

it was just crazier to see these rich women who had the money who wanted people who didn't have the money. All

the trainers around me also were kind of similar to me financially. Like we

weren't balling, probably making around 50k a year, 40k a year doing the training stuff at the gym. You know how the gym works. Like you you get paid

probably 20% if best of what they're paying you per session, right? The going

rate for those gyms that I was working at, the Equinox one in San Francisco was $200 a session, right? Crazy. $200 a

session. The one in in Wy in Boston, Massachusetts was around $90 a session, $90 to $100 a session.

So, these were like higher price things.

And so, we would get a small percentage of that. We we'd only get 20%.

of that. We we'd only get 20%.

And I just I just understood. I was

like, man, it's not it's not what I the whole like idea of women like I it just shattered my idea. Like it it helped me understand that like you are not safe even with money. If you're

one-dimensional, if you only have money, you're not safe. You got to have multiple different attributes to you that wow the woman. You have to you have to be in her fantasy consistently of as

a man. Like if you're jacked, you're in

a man. Like if you're jacked, you're in shape, and you're also making money, and you're also charismatic, and you're also super competent in other areas of life, she will always be attracted to you for the most part. And and you you have the

freedom to be able to do things with her and have adventures with like a lot of these women would always tell me like, "Oh yeah, we go on vacation like once a year, you know, cuz he's always traveling for work and stuff like that,

and I'm always like with the kids and and all of that." And they would just they would tell me everything about their relationships, everything about their lives. And I would feel so bad for

their lives. And I would feel so bad for these guys because maybe they knew, maybe they didn't know, maybe they just didn't give a [ __ ] honestly. Cuz I I've also come across a lot of guys who are well off that don't give a [ __ ] what

their woman does because they're also doing some [ __ ] on the side and they're really just there to build the family, build the legacy, and just do whatever, right? This will typically happen. But

right? This will typically happen. But

it was it would be so interesting to understand how these women think and how they view their relationship and how they don't give a [ __ ] about their relationship and how they see their relationship as almost a crutch to their

life versus like something that is actually a benefit for them. I mean,

they're benefiting with the money.

They're benefiting with the the guy who's ambitious, right? But they want the other things. They want the intangible thing or the tangible things that aren't necessarily as important as

the money. And as I started to learn

the money. And as I started to learn this, even when I was at Equinox, it was the same exact pattern, the same exact scenario. These rich women would come

scenario. These rich women would come around, they would they would talk, they would overtalk about their conversations with their husbands and their issues in the bedroom, their issues with his

physical appearance, their issues with his over dedication to work. And it's

like in my mind, I'm like, how ungrateful could you be? Like this guy that you're married to, this this multi-millionaire

is out here doing everything possible to keep your life beautiful, but you go to this personal trainer who possibly would financially ruin your

life to get something the 10% that you don't have. So, it was an interesting

don't have. So, it was an interesting dynamic where I realized that a lot of men re think that like, okay, I can give 90%

And even if I don't have the 10%, it's fine. But they don't tend to realize the

fine. But they don't tend to realize the 10% that they ignore is the 90% that the woman wants. It's it goes both ways with

woman wants. It's it goes both ways with relationships that I've noticed. When

I've when I've trained these women, I finally realized this. I was like, a lot of men think like I'm giving 90% of what I think she wants. And I don't have that 10%. In the woman's mind, he's giving

10%. In the woman's mind, he's giving nothing because there's the 10% that that she wants is the 90% that that he gives. and the 90% that she wants is

gives. and the 90% that she wants is only actually zero% of what he gives. So

there's like a misalignment in what's being given on both sides, right? That's

why men cheat because they look for that 10% that they don't have in the household. That's why women cheat

household. That's why women cheat because they they look for that 10% that they they they don't have that means more to them than the 90% that they're getting. So it was a very interesting

getting. So it was a very interesting dynamic. And luckily for me, man, like I

dynamic. And luckily for me, man, like I believe in karma, so I I never ever ever [ __ ] where I where I eat, bro. Like

never never never never never. And I

would just come away with so much more wisdom and so much more understanding of like women who actually are in marriages with successful men, like how they truly think, how money is not everything. It

is something. It is something that's very important. I'm not sitting here

very important. I'm not sitting here saying that you should not go get money and you should just get jacked and be broke and live whatever. Do both because you can do both. And that's what I would always look at their husbands and I'm

like, "Bro, you you could go to the gym.

You're not traveling every single day."

And even if you are traveling, there's a gym in that hotel. You can go train. You

can take care of yourself. You don't

have to look the way that you look. But

they don't care because they're like, "Money money money money money money." Most of these guys were money

money." Most of these guys were money hungry to get to that level to where like these guys were making multi-million They had like multi-millions of dollars in in in money that was coming into them every single

year. They had these billion-dollar

year. They had these billion-dollar corporations, but they didn't give a [ __ ] about their health because they just cared about the money. And I would see the relationship just like drift.

And I would see the upcoming problems that would come in. A lot of these guys end up getting divorces because they would come back into the gym a year or two later and be like, "Yeah, things didn't work out, man. Like everything

went bad." And they would literally just like go to the gym and start to train because they realize, "Damn, I need to get in shape. I I I didn't I didn't take care of my body and stuff like that.

They would talk about the sex life that they had. They would say how it was piss

they had. They would say how it was piss poor. And it just taught me so much,

poor. And it just taught me so much, man. But like I wanted to tell you guys

man. But like I wanted to tell you guys this because I know a lot of us are are are here like, you know, we're we're we're chasing the bag. We're chasing the money. We're chasing all these things.

money. We're chasing all these things.

And we also do want to have women, right? We do. We we are you're attracted

right? We do. We we are you're attracted to women, right? It's okay to say that, fellas. It's okay to say you're

fellas. It's okay to say you're attracted to women. And I know the key with that to maintain the attraction, to maintain the the the pull is to stay in

shape, make money, and be very very social with the woman, right? Be very

involved as best as you can. Show some

level of involvement. That's all of it.

And I think a lot of guys don't necessarily do this. And they they tend to fail with women a lot. That's why a lot of rich guys get divorces very very very quickly. like the the woman waits

very quickly. like the the woman waits for a certain period of time until everything's on autopilot and she collects her bag and she runs and it's like I see this [ __ ] happen over and over again and as a young trainer it

blew my [ __ ] mind cuz I'm like if you have money then the woman's going to stay loyal. I was like nah it's not the

stay loyal. I was like nah it's not the case at all. You have to you have to have more things. You have to have more things to offer. Is this fair? No.

Right. Of course it's not fair but life isn't fair. But at least when you

isn't fair. But at least when you understand these things, you can operate differently and you can focus on different areas of your life and do what I always say is become multi-dimensional. Because when you're

multi-dimensional. Because when you're multi-dimensional, how can she compare you to to anybody at that point? Because

you you tick so many boxes and you tick the right boxes, right? You are in shape. So that way you're not a minute

shape. So that way you're not a minute man, right? You're somebody who can take

man, right? You're somebody who can take their clothes off in in broad daylight and and you're comfortable in your own skin. You are making the money, right?

skin. You are making the money, right?

because you have this career that you're doing or you have this business that you're running. You you understand the

you're running. You you understand the concept of making money. You have the charisma. You can make her laugh. You

charisma. You can make her laugh. You

can you can tell stories. You can

captivate her imagination whenever you need to. You can be around. You have the

need to. You can be around. You have the freedom, right? A lot of these corporate

freedom, right? A lot of these corporate guys are stuck. Golden handcuffs, right?

Golden handcuffs. I remember my uncle, my uncle was probably the most successful person in my family and he left his corporate job that was paying him multiple six figures a year to go build his own business because he wanted the freedom that came with that

business. He was chasing freedom at that

business. He was chasing freedom at that point. He was like, "Man, I got golden

point. He was like, "Man, I got golden handcuffs." He told me, "Martel, if he's

handcuffs." He told me, "Martel, if he's the one that that actually pushed me to go to Babson College cuz I didn't want to go there." He said, "Martel, if you can do anything, be an entrepreneur, own your life. Yes, it will be a sacrifice

your life. Yes, it will be a sacrifice in the beginning, but own your time because when you go into these corporations and you start working in these corporations, you will never have time for yourself. You'll never have

time for your family. The job will be your entire life and you will literally feel like a slave and that paycheck won't mean anything.

And that's what I saw with a lot of these guys that these rich women would would be marrying, right? These rich

guys that these women would be marrying.

Let's keep it real, right? Because

that's where they got the the source of money.

But it was just crazy to experience this stuff and like really really see the the the the dark mind of of how women work when their man is not there. And it just

taught me, man, it's just like one, never ever say say, "Okay, if your if your woman wants to hire a male trainer, you should be in the best shape of your life to where you're giving her nutritional advice, you're giving her

training advice, you should be the go-to for that. She wants to get a masseuse,

for that. She wants to get a masseuse, you learn how to give good good massages so she doesn't need that [ __ ] Everything, bro. And expect the same for

Everything, bro. And expect the same for her, too. Whatever your needs are, bro.

her, too. Whatever your needs are, bro.

Like, if you if if you're a high uh hypersexual guy and you you want to have sex all the time, like she should be catch catching up with that. And if she doesn't, then boom, now you got to go somewhere else, right? So, it it has to

be give and take. But at the end of the day, it's like when you can master multiple different things, life becomes a lot easier and your relationships become a lot easier. And that's where a lot of men mess up. That's that's what

that's what I learned being a trainer.

So, I hope this was somewhat insightful for you. I hope this was helpful for

for you. I hope this was helpful for you. Um, again, if you want to work with

you. Um, again, if you want to work with me one-on-one to just build your life, get some freedom, be able to live the life that I'm living right now, which is super dope, jacked, paid, free, all of

that, link will be in the description.

Tap in with me. one-on-one mentorships

or you can get different programs to help you with different things. Um, I'm

really just keeping everything broad right now so that you can get as much value, whatever value you need at whatever stage you're in. I will be adding more courses and programs in there as well and maybe even like a a

sales accelerator for guys who want to get remote income so that they can be able to live a life of freedom to a certain extent. I mean, obviously you're

certain extent. I mean, obviously you're going to work, but you you'll be able to be location free, right? Which I think is my goal for you guys is to be location free. But hopefully this was

location free. But hopefully this was helpful for you.