“Why Even Try?” — What My Son Told Me About Gen Z’s Future Shocked Me

Hello world. I'm an unemployed ex big tech software engineer with 25 years of experience in the tech industry. Now,

one of the benefits of involuntary early retirement is that I get to spend a lot more time with my kids. And just the other day, I got drawn into a very long conversation with my son. So, it turns

out that my teenage son and his gang of friends thinks that the future is going to be bad no matter what they do. So, he

thought that you might as well give up trying. Initially, I felt kind of

trying. Initially, I felt kind of annoyed. I felt that my son should get

annoyed. I felt that my son should get out there and fight life's contests instead of running to me and whining about it. Honestly, I felt that my boy

about it. Honestly, I felt that my boy was being lazy and entitled. I have

given him so many opportunities and why should he not take advantage of those opportunities to advance himself in life? Where is this defeist giving up on

life? Where is this defeist giving up on everything attitude coming from? And

just then I realized something. I'm

turning into my own parents. Because as

I was growing up, whenever I had some rough spots in my life, this sort of attitude and response was exactly what I got from my own parents. I would be

blamed for being entitled, for being ungrateful for the blessings that I have and basically be called a screw-up for everything. Pretty much every major

everything. Pretty much every major decision that I've made as an adult in the eyes of my parents are at some level a mistake or a screw-up or a disappointment. Now that I'm laid off

disappointment. Now that I'm laid off from my big tech job, to my parents, this is the greatest mistake that I've ever made in my life. Now, I'm always

going to love my parents, but in my personal opinion, this style of parenting is highly, highly counterproductive. And so I wanted to

counterproductive. And so I wanted to provide my son with a slightly higher level of parental guidance. As such, I had a much longer in-depth conversation

with my son. I really wanted to understand why he and his friends thought that their lives and their future was going to be bad no matter what they try to do. Now, what I heard

was quite remarkable, and I'm going to share it with everyone, but please keep in mind this is the point of view of a bunch of teenage boys in high school.

Here are the key points mentioned. So

there is a huge fear that there will be a scarcity of good jobs in the future.

This fear of not being able to get money, not being able to build a secure and thriving future, of not being able to advance in life. It seems like their

fathers, the older brothers, social media, they're telling the boys that getting good, highpaying jobs or careers will be next to impossible in the

future. AI, humanoid robots, all of

future. AI, humanoid robots, all of these things were mentioned as essentially a possible cause of this happening. Now, I think this is a really

happening. Now, I think this is a really legitimate concern, right? Because as

human civilization moves towards an increasingly automated future, the number of good, high-paying jobs for people really could drop through the

floor. Now, my boy also has this opinion

floor. Now, my boy also has this opinion that in the near future, just in time for when he becomes an adult, inflation

will skyrocket to the point where the price for basic staples like groceries would be so high that necessities would almost be like luxuries. Now, both of

us, me and my boy, are science fiction fans. And we started talking about this

fans. And we started talking about this 1970s science fiction movie called Soil and Green. This was like this dystopian

and Green. This was like this dystopian world uh of the 2020s where a bag of groceries would cost more than $200. And

both of us was like, "Oh my god, this movie actually happened in real life."

And in reality, inflation in recent years have been so bad that the price of basic necessities, rent, food,

transportation, utilities, these things have gotten so high that for the average young adult with the median income, pretty much all of their money is being

eaten up just to exist, leaving almost no money for anything else. So, this is also a very legit issue. So that then led to the question of assets.

My son felt that by the time that he and his friends became men, it would be like joining a game of monopoly at the end stages where every single lot has

already been bought up. The thought is that all the property, houses, land, assets, stocks, it would all be so highriced that they would not be able to

acquire property for themselves. My boy

thinks that price of housing, for example, will be so high that he'll never be able to purchase a house for himself. I also think this is a

himself. I also think this is a reasonable and legit concern, right?

Because we've been in a kind of asset bubble where the valuation of assets have gotten so high that most young people can't really afford to make these major purchases and build their wealth.

Another thing that we talked about is the lack of trust in major institutions like the government and corporations and the leaders of these institutions. Now,

I remember when I was a teenager in the '9s, right? My impression of the

'9s, right? My impression of the American government is like a version of Captain America, this sort of shining city on the hill, something for other

countries and governments to emulate. if

aliens are invading the earth or a comet is about to strike the world. I actually

at the time expected the American government to step up and save humanity.

I looked up to the president to the CEOs of major corporations as role models that a person would aspire to become.

Now the younger generation, Gen Z, seems to see these institutions as being fundamentally corrupt and untrustworthy.

And the leaders, they talk about these leaders as being a bunch of degenerate criminals. Now, I'm not entirely sure

criminals. Now, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about all of this, right?

Because it seems to me that the internet has aired a lot of dirty laundry on the misdeeds of the leadership that perhaps these same crimes happened in prior

generations, but back then it would have just been covered up. It seems to me that this level of information transparency on the conduct of top

leadership and top institutions is kind of destabilizing to the entire society.

Now the last thing that we talked about was of course woman troubles. So, it

sounds to me like the crux of the problem here is that young women, young Gen Z women don't want to talk to the young men or really have anything to do

with the young men. Now, this doesn't make much sense to me, right? Because

man and woman, they have a natural need for each other. But I think there's a few things happening here. Now,

naturally, young women would be attracted to sort of the top echelons of guys, right? in terms of physical looks,

guys, right? in terms of physical looks, in terms of money, status, leadership and so on. This is natural and reasonable. But it also seems that young

reasonable. But it also seems that young women are also attracted to young men for their personality, character, and other intangible factors. But this

secondary set of factors requires spending significant amount of time getting to know a guy. And somehow it seems to me that our socioeconomic

system have taken these natural human tendencies and warped them into something dysfunctional. What do I mean

something dysfunctional. What do I mean by that? Well, on the one hand, society

by that? Well, on the one hand, society has made it more difficult for young men to achieve the traditional markers of

success, right? There's just way less

success, right? There's just way less good jobs or good opportunities for young men to go and demonstrate their skill and their leadership and make tons

of money. Society has shifted where

of money. Society has shifted where there are far fewer third places available where young men and women can meet, interact, and really get to know

each other on a deeper level. On the

other hand, it seems like social media and digital platforms are giving the young women a false impression that there is this limitless supply of highc

caliber guys available. But the reality is that small number of highquality guys in society, they're only ever going to

take one wife, right? And chances are with so many young women pursuing them, they may decide not to take any wives.

So net net most young men are not getting women and most young women are not getting men that are willing to marry them and start families with them.

It's just a dysfunctional mess with no easy solution in sight. So by the end of this conversation, my son had made a lot of good points. It seems like the odds

are stacked against Gen Z. So in that case, why bother trying? Why bother

working hard anyway? But here's the thing, an entire generation of young people can't just give up on mass. This

would create a lowd desire society.

There are a lot of examples of lowd desire societies in East Asia. There you

have huge numbers of people who don't want to fight and aspire to anything.

They don't want to compete for the top jobs and the big money. Whatever little

money they have, they don't even want to spend that money. They don't want to go date. They don't want to get married.

date. They don't want to get married.

They don't want to have children. They

don't want to do anything. This kind of a mindset is a recipe for demographic collapse and eventually social collapse.

But here's the thing. Without a

fundamental refactoring of our social economic system, I don't see a clean solution that can solve these challenges for this entire generation of young people. So that night, I had trouble

people. So that night, I had trouble sleeping. I was like twisting and

sleeping. I was like twisting and turning and bad. And that woke up my wife who got annoyed and then she yelled at me. And the next day I did some more

at me. And the next day I did some more thinking. And I thought while a total

thinking. And I thought while a total societal solution is likely not possible, it is totally possible for

individuals to get their kids to escape this trap and succeed in life. So after

some research, I have come up with a list of coping strategies to help parents help their kids succeed. So,

let's get going. You want to provide your kids with encouragement and emotional support. Talk to your kids.

emotional support. Talk to your kids.

Listen to them. Listen to their worries and concerns. Show the joy that you feel

and concerns. Show the joy that you feel for being their parents. Let your kids know that feeling overwhelmed is okay and it's a normal part of growing up and

being an adult in this world. Remind

them that meaningful growth is a journey and these journeys take time. help these

guys build a mindset that is resilient to the storms of life. You want to teach your kids to embrace frugality. You want

to teach them of just how harmful consumerism can be for their future selves. You want to teach your boys that

selves. You want to teach your boys that a man can be happy and content with life without spending huge amounts of money all the time. You want to teach the kids

to be more self-sufficient.

Self-sufficient in terms of managing their everyday tasks. opportunities and

activities and responsibilities. You

want to teach them basic financial literacy, right? How do you manage and

literacy, right? How do you manage and maintain a budget? How do you service and pay off debt? How do you invest the money that you have saved? Things like

that. You want to consider providing targeted financial support to your kids during the critical early years of their career as they're just getting

established. This means subsidizing

established. This means subsidizing their basic living expenses. Perhaps

your kid is just getting started at a low paid internship. Consider allowing

your kid to live at home at reduced rent or no rent for a while. This can be really helpful if your adult child is working in a no pay or low pay early

position and he needs to get that critical work experience to advance.

Obviously, we have to set clear boundaries and timelines for this kind of support, right? Because you don't want kids to become dependent indefinitely on financial support. But

the point of the support is to allow your children to save money, build experience, and become self-sufficient.

Consider setting aside a pool of money to help your children with one-time major life expenses. These expenses

include things like college tuitions or a down payment on their first home. This

kind of one-time help at the right time can greatly accelerate your child's path to success and independence. Consider

modeling healthy relationships.

What do I mean by that? Through your own actions, you can show your children what a healthy relationship looks like. We

can show as parents how man and woman are supposed to treat each other hopefully with respect and kindness and empathy. As parents, we can demonstrate

empathy. As parents, we can demonstrate to our kids that in a functional relationship, virtues like patience,

kindness, respect, and shared values is more important and enduring than superficial qualities like status,

bling, money, short-term attractiveness, and so on. The point of this effort is to teach your child to know what they're looking for in a partner rather than

relying on the filtering mechanism of an app like Tinder to do so. So, that's it for my coping strategies. Perhaps some

of these can help you. I know I'll be trying some of them for myself. Anyways,

I hope you found this helpful. If you

have a morbid curiosity to join me in this life journey, please feel free to subscribe to this channel and subscribe to my Substack newsletter. If you want to support my vlog making efforts,

please feel free to become a member of this channel or just buy me a coffee. If

you want a one-on-one coaching session or just a chat, please schedule a meeting with me. Anyways, thanks so much for watching. Talk soon. Bye.

for watching. Talk soon. Bye.